Discussion Were you considered a weird kid?

[LonelyPrince]

Yes, prob because of neurodivergence. I still don't know what I gave due to psychiatrists being unable to understand what's my problem.
Wherever I went as a kid I was bullied.

 

[DonLockwood]

Yeah I definitely was. Throughout my childhood I was off-putting to others and normally kept with the other "weird kids". Most of my free time I was kept to computers cause of just not being invited or around other people. Autism doesn't help with it either.

I would still consider myself one today. Poor social skills with strangers. Keeping with the same group from school. Making friends is hard where I'm from. But I'd argue it's more cause of me rather than where o am.

 

[lastappleonearth]

Yes, prob because of neurodivergence. I still don't know what I gave due to psychiatrists being unable to understand what's my problem.
Wherever I went as a kid I was bullied.

I'm sorry, bullying is genuinely awful

Yeah I definitely was. Throughout my childhood I was off-putting to others and normally kept with the other "weird kids". Most of my free time I was kept to computers cause of just not being invited or around other people. Autism doesn't help with it either.

I would still consider myself one today. Poor social skills with strangers. Keeping with the same group from school. Making friends is hard where I'm from. But I'd argue it's more cause of me rather than where o am.

I think it's generally a bit more difficult to make friends when you're an adult. It especially sucks when you don't have any school or childhood friends anymore. But idk, depends on a bunch of things I guess

 

[Die.A.Ria]

I once took a highlighter and colored my entire body yellow to convince my teacher I had jaundice. Is that weird? I feel like it is.

HAH WHAT

 

[lastappleonearth]

HAH WHAT

Power move tbh

 

[iguazo falls]

yeah, i was almost diagnosed with schizoid and/or autism as a kid. i didnt fit in with any of my family, and was part of the weird kid groups though eventually i had not much in common with them either. i was lucky enough to be ignored instead of bullied and adapted in some ways, but generally i feel i was offputting to a lot of people and too quiet/brooding for them. i honestly believe self esteem is big factor to why i offput people, and my mum would yell at me as a kid asking "why can't you just be normal" or berate me in public for wearing comfortable clothing (like a hoodie) which i think she's the initial cause of a lot of my self image issues. in retrospect repressing myself and actively trying to pretend via clothing and mannerisms (also a lot due to my parents) to be someone who i'm not put alot of people off too. plus trying to bribe or be desperate for certain people's attention didn't help. i was often excluded from my own friends' events and hangouts likely for ruining their vibe or not being as experienced in life. i had even been rejected from weird groups for not being as explicitly alternative or queer enough which was fairly hurtful since i was stuck in a situation of not being able to express myself without family breakdown. a lot of it was just me as well, i was kind of crazy and edgy as a teen and the most chronically online one but i just wanted to be seen and cared about like anyone else.

there's this guy people i know diss or don't like and there's literally nothing crazy or harmful about him, he just comes off as desperate and tries to pay for your time by buying you stuff from the store. last i heard he took on an eshay kind of attire and is all of a sudden hanging out with people i know are pretty brash instead his last group of nerds (who i think didn't like him). his parents afaik were christian and really sheltered the guy. in retrospect i wish i got to know the guy more, and hearing what people around me said about him hurt too. it kinda triggers something when i hear people who identify a lot with being weird or against the norm hate on others who haven't done anything wrong but give them an odd vibe, or are struggling with insecurity.

 

[lastappleonearth]

yeah, i was almost diagnosed with schizoid and/or autism as a kid. i didnt fit in with any of my family, and was part of the weird kid groups though eventually i had not much in common with them either. i was lucky enough to be ignored instead of bullied and adapted in some ways, but generally i feel i was offputting to a lot of people and too quiet/brooding for them. i honestly believe self esteem is big factor to why i offput people, and my mum would yell at me as a kid asking "why can't you just be normal" or berate me in public for wearing comfortable clothing (like a hoodie) which i think she's the initial cause of a lot of my self image issues. in retrospect repressing myself and actively trying to pretend via clothing and mannerisms (also a lot due to my parents) to be someone who i'm not put alot of people off too. plus trying to bribe or be desperate for certain people's attention didn't help. i was often excluded from my own friends' events and hangouts likely for ruining their vibe or not being as experienced in life. i had even been rejected from weird groups for not being as explicitly alternative or queer enough which was fairly hurtful since i was stuck in a situation of not being able to express myself without family breakdown. a lot of it was just me as well, i was kind of crazy and edgy as a teen and the most chronically online one but i just wanted to be seen and cared about like anyone else.

there's this guy people i know diss or don't like and there's literally nothing crazy or harmful about him, he just comes off as desperate and tries to pay for your time by buying you stuff from the store. last i heard he took on an eshay kind of attire and is all of a sudden hanging out with people i know are pretty brash instead his last group of nerds (who i think didn't like him). his parents afaik were christian and really sheltered the guy. in retrospect i wish i got to know the guy more, and hearing what people around me said about him hurt too. it kinda triggers something when i hear people who identify a lot with being weird or against the norm hate on others who haven't done anything wrong but give them an odd vibe, or are struggling with insecurity.

Wanting to be seen and cared about is only natural. If you feel like no one really cares about you and that is has been like this for a while, the logical consequence is obviously desperation. Idk, I'm pretty desperate too, but I just don't act on it anymore, I don't try to connect with anyone anymore tbh, but I do want to be cared about someday. I feel like I have a lot to give in terms of love and also friendship, but yeah, we will never know I guess. I don't even know why I work out, I mean nobody even sees me. Sorry for the rant btw. I hope things get better for you, you deserve to be cared about

 

[notthatclever]

No.. and yeah.. I was bullied really bad at times.. I was a really emotional child.. I cried a lot when I was little.. funnily enough I don't cry much anymore.. I've dealt with some form of bullying all my life really.. not that I stand for it.. I'm not a pushover.. but people see me and think they can bully me for some reason.. it's really weird.. but I was really quiet and liked to play alone a lot.. I'm still that way..

But I mean I also liked to do normal kid things.. I liked swimming, we had a pool growing up.. I liked to play outside a lot.. I was into music and art and took lessons for piano and things like that.. I usually always had really good grades.. straight A's or A's and B's until about 7th grade or so and social pressure became to overwhelming for me and my grades didn't go back up until we moved before my Junior year.. I had good grades in some classes but other weren't so hot.. social pressure at that age at my school was a lot for me.. and I had trouble concentrating.. also a lot of deaths happened around that time.. we had like 5-6 people die in my family in a span of 3-4 years.. we were always at funerals.. it was a really stressful time in my life.. but it took me longer to figure out how girls were.. like looks and clothes and stuff.. but if by weird you mean eating paste and shit like that.. no.. I wasn't THAT weird kid.. I've always been socially awkward though.. I never had many friends. Even when I was little.. I just had a couple close ones.. my two sisters though.. they're friends with everybody.. social butterflies.. everybody seems to like them no matter what..

For context.. my first day of school ever, Kindergarten.. mind you this is almost 40 years ago.. I remember it well though.. and I was super excited and my Dad walked me in and my little sister tagged along to watch.. and we were in the front lobby and I saw another girl and walked up to say hi.. because I was excited.. and she just out of nowhere slapped me in the face..

We were 5.. and that's pretty much been my life some way somehow since.. just random strange bitches acting like just that.. a bitch..

All my friends growing up just about were female.. but anymore now my friends are my cats.. my cats are my family too really..

But I mean I was in piano.. martial arts.. Girl Scouts for years.. I did normal kid things..

I was just the quiet liked kid inside those things.. I was damn near the only girl in martial arts and kickboxing my age. I was little when I started..

I had an obsession with the tv show Kung Fu and begged my parents.. so I was this tiny 6 year old doing martial arts.. I was in that for years.. I'm actually a better kickboxer..

I'm a lefty so all the karate moves.. because when you test you have to move in certain sequence.. I learned it backwards..

Whereas kickboxing.. you're just flying through the air round housing everybody..

But I liked cartoons and Disney movies and all the normal stuff.. I just never was great at figuring out having friends..

Then again everybody I try to be friends with.. they fuck me over and fuck me over and fuck me over and then when I'm clear I've had enough they tend to blame me and play victim..

Boyfriend is trying to play that now.. nobody cares or believes him because they know better..

And trust me dating him is having the patience of Ghandi..

I guess it just got to a point here lately.. I just feel like I'm wasting my life with him..

He's had almost a year to change his shit and he hasn't.. if anything he's doubled down on it.. he's one of those that makes a better friend.. but only if you're a guy..

He's 45 and never been married.. so that's a red flag. I was with my ex husband for 18 years.. he just doesn't understand how relationships work at all.. he doesn't understand give and take..

I just broke up with him.. I just ripped the bandaid right off.. like just a couple hours ago.. he's trippin..

All I have to do is make sure he's taken care of so he can care for the cats until I can come back and get them.. I've just never seen somebody with all the maaajor fucked up problems he hasn't be so deludedly critical of somebody that has nowhere near his problems in life or issues.. I mean he throws rocks in a shattered glass house..

He is the ultimate hypocrite.. he is just not clued in with the real world at all..

And from what I understand what little he's told me.. he was a very aggressive child.. he had a lot of problems.. he was normal in terms of just being a bad kid.. he did the normal bad kid shit.. did a lot of drugs.. had sex young.. had his first kid at 15 with an 18 year old girl.. dropped out of high school to work to pay child support.. so a lot of his current problems seems to stem that he's in some stunted adolescence..

It's like being around an overgrown teenager a lot.. his adult life he's been weirder..

I digress.. I was just more socially awkward rather than weird.. I enjoyed all the normal kid things I just had a hard time developing friends.. and I was bullied a lot.. probably my at the time baby subconscious as to why I started martial arts..

I almost always date a social butterfly though.. every guy I date is super social has a million friends.. my ex husband was a social butterfly..

Now that I'm single.. I'm banning myself from dating for five years.. and the next one I'm going out of my way to make sure they're a loner homebody type like me..

 

[Passenger4224]

Always was. I'm an adult now and still am. I am indeed a fucking weirdo.

 

[hevnsfall]

I was the morbidly obese straight A goth outcast who got beaten and bullied for 12 years straight until moving out to uni. Still am weird. Will forever be.

 

[neverexistedd]

yes, I've always been the "Weird one", some people even were asking me if I'm on drugs/I do drugs/I smoke weed/I'm hungover, even though I wasn't any of these things, people just think I'm a weird person and hate me since they meet me, I just embraced it and learned to not care about anyone anymore

 

[name2come]

Oh, totally. I'm pretty sure now that I'm somewhere on the spectrum of neurodivergence, but as a kid this often manifested in not really knowing how to socialize or relate to other kids. I could be very naive and miss social cues. I was a weird mix of immature emotionally but maybe overly mature in manner, but I guess that's not an uncommon package. As I moved into my teens, I became increasingly aware of how I was getting things wrong and struggled with low self-esteem as result. I got very good at masking. I'm pretty good at mirroring the personality and energy of people I'm around, though usually pitched a good deal more introverted. I can match energy pretty good, but I'm much more likely to sit on the sidelines than jump in. I don't trust my instincts with others. I imagine I seem nice, but quiet. I don't know how to make friends or sustain friendships, so I wouldn't exactly say my masking is terribly effective for much beyond not seeming like a weirdo. But I also kind of envy the freedom being a weirdo can bring. I would have eventually "found my people", but when I did I just couldn't engage much. I am desperately afraid of being a burden on people or overstaying my welcome, but what this really means is that I never ask anyone for anything. Not even their attention. I might as well not be there. And that's on me. I know this isn't anyone else's doing. I just never learned how to have friends. Its too late now. I can be fickle, anyway. I'm not sure I'd be good at it.

 

[coralreefer]

Omg yes This, but I was a little scary. So what I'm about to tell you guys is partly what I remember myself and partly what my mom told me.

I used to really like this horror movie when I was a kid (don't remember the name, I think I repressed the memory of it lol), where the main character was a child and liked to dissect animals (kinda, it was more like ripping animals apart). I really struggled with social stuff because me and my parents have never really had a relationship, but basically I thought the main character was so cool and he was a little older than me so I sort of looked up to him for a lack of better words.

It started with insects. I would kill them and pluck off their legs and stuff, but that stuff is pretty normal for kids. Then it was larvae and bigger insects and small animals like butterflies and crabs and stuff. I didn't really see them as living organisms because they were so small and can't really make sounds, so that's why I kept doing it. I think I liked it because it gave me power over something and it was sort of interesting to look at.

This next part I don't really remember, but my mom told me the gist of it.

In our town I lived in when I was younger there used to be a huge cat problem, there were a lot of them all over the place and people were forbidden from feeding them and taking care of them because of it. Anyway, this made kittens really common around the area and I wanted to "experiment" on a bigger animal I guess. I killed the kitten first and was planning on looking at its intestines and insides because I thought it would be cool, but honestly it just made me feel terrible. I barely remember it, but I remember crying the whole night and thinking karma was gonna get me.

I truly feel awful thinking about it now, but yeah, I was pretty weird back then and everyone pretty much knew it.

(Fyi: this was when I was around six-eight and I've never thought about harming any animal or human since! It really impacted me and taught me a lesson about empathy. I also went to a child psychologist after this, but I wasn't diagnosed or medicated with anything.)

 

[DanielDanDean]

Always the weird one, always an outcast.
Niche interests, little social ability, was a smart kid but gave up trying before middle school because.. why bother?
Then I got access to the (at the time way more free) Internet and discovered I wasn't alone.
When I was in high school, alcohol helped me be less shy but I still was a bit of an outcast
Still an outcast today after ~5 years of thinking I had finally found my place in life

Now governments and companies are killing the internet, my only safe place in life

 

[Lost in a Dream]

Hell yeah I was weird as a kid. I remember when I was in preschool, I used to take these toys that were meant to fit together to build stuff that I discovered could fit onto my finger tips and look like claws while I stamped around and pretended to be a T-rex. I also struggled with socializing when I was a kid and had periods where I hated just about everyone I went to school with, while also having friends that were also weird like me. My fellow weirdos were the only ones I didn't hate. Being a kid was a strange time for me. I also had facial ticks when I was younger and people called me retarded a lot. When I was in Middle school, I used to play with a tape recorder where I invented my own imaginary friends and gave them names and voices, while I recorded them doing things together on cassette tapes.

Truth be told, I was way more intelligent than most of my classmates were, despite them calling me that R-word. When I was a kid, I loved learning about history, and I used to take my history books home and just read them to myself, and then when the rest of my class would catch up, I was like, "Yeah, I remember this haha!" There was also a time when my class was reading something in one of our history books about slavery in the south and my teacher literally dared us to read in a Southern accent. I was the only one willing to try it (despite that accent not being normal for me) and I remember the teacher had a hard time trying not to laugh lol.

And to this day I'm still super weird compared to most people. I mean I believe that people who don't want to live should have the right to end their lives peacefully any time they choose, but most people are completely anti-choice when it comes to suicide. I say most people suck, and I want to be nothing like them. I'm also an antinatalist and an efilist, since I am completely against procreation (which is normal and natural to most people), and think that the extinction of all life would be the best way to end all suffering (and most people seem to think that's wrong because SOME people and animals enjoy their lives).

 

[zanshu]

Yes, I was definitely the weird quiet kid at school. During kindergarten and the first two years of elementary school I never spoke a word, which is why I didn't have any friends back then.
Slowly, as I started talking, I became the weird weeb kid who cried a lot lol.

I am pretty outgoing and bubbly now, and that is not faked. I enjoy laughing and talking to people, and spending time with my friends I adore.

Sometimes, though, people would randomly ask me if I'm okay because I tend to have this dissociative look in my eyes, but I am also neurodivergent, so

 

[lastappleonearth]

Oh, totally. I'm pretty sure now that I'm somewhere on the spectrum of neurodivergence, but as a kid this often manifested in not really knowing how to socialize or relate to other kids. I could be very naive and miss social cues. I was a weird mix of immature emotionally but maybe overly mature in manner, but I guess that's not an uncommon package. As I moved into my teens, I became increasingly aware of how I was getting things wrong and struggled with low self-esteem as result. I got very good at masking. I'm pretty good at mirroring the personality and energy of people I'm around, though usually pitched a good deal more introverted. I can match energy pretty good, but I'm much more likely to sit on the sidelines than jump in. I don't trust my instincts with others. I imagine I seem nice, but quiet. I don't know how to make friends or sustain friendships, so I wouldn't exactly say my masking is terribly effective for much beyond not seeming like a weirdo. But I also kind of envy the freedom being a weirdo can bring. I would have eventually "found my people", but when I did I just couldn't engage much. I am desperately afraid of being a burden on people or overstaying my welcome, but what this really means is that I never ask anyone for anything. Not even their attention. I might as well not be there. And that's on me. I know this isn't anyone else's doing. I just never learned how to have friends. Its too late now. I can be fickle, anyway. I'm not sure I'd be good at it.

Yeah I got pretty good at mirroring and masking, when I was in high school, but that shit was so exhausting. So now I'm back to having really bad social skills and I'm pretty introverted, well always was I guess. I'm also struggling with low self esteem. I thought that working out would kinda solve this, but it didnt, I like my body now and think it looks good, but I'm so insecure abt my face.
Well anyways, wish you the best

Yes, I was definitely the weird quiet kid at school. During kindergarten and the first two years of elementary school I never spoke a word, which is why I didn't have any friends back then.
Slowly, as I started talking, I became the weird weeb kid who cried a lot lol.

I am pretty outgoing and bubbly now, and that is not faked. I enjoy laughing and talking to people, and spending time with my friends I adore.

Sometimes, though, people would randomly ask me if I'm okay because I tend to have this dissociative look in my eyes, but I am also neurodivergent, so

I think for the first 6 months in kindergarten I also didn't speak to anyone. I guess I was pissed at my parents that they "gave me away" lol, but yeah then I fortunately started interacting with others.
I btw also have that look, but I guess, I just dissociate quite often. It's like I'm never really present, at least not mentally

 

[infinitetraumacycle]

I was wondering, bcs ever since I can remember I have been called weird by my family members. Granted, I did some weird stuff and had strange interests I guess, but idk. In kindergarten and elementary school I used to draw a lot, and the only thing I ever drew was violence and war and I don't even know why, I'm not a violent person. My parents told me that I wanted to look at WW2 books, when I was just 4 years old. In elementary school I started drawing quite elaborate war scenarios, I really liked doing that. Also I've always been told that I have a very melancholic personality, like that I don't often show positive emotions or don't act euphoric. It was always irritating when ppl were upset, bcs I couldn't act euphoric after being gifted something. It's not like I do that on purpose, I just can't bring myself to do it and I don't want to fake it either. I could never really fit in, not even when it comes to my own family

Yeah pretty early already,

When I was between 4-12 I didn't really talk with anyone and people would always point that out, not with family either. I used to go to football when I was younger and they always asked me why I never talk or why I never showed up in training.

But at high school it was worse, I eventually did start talking more with who I thought were friends. But the topics I talked about were always making them annoyed. So eventually I just got bullied for that. They would tell me to shut up when I was talking about crypto or history.

But yeah it got really bad, it was also a little my fault but when I was severely depressed I said some stupid stuff and everyone knew me as a weird kid and they thought I would do a school shooting, which I never claimed to do. Just some gossips but whatever

Weird kids unite ig lmao

Also I have a question. My cousin sounds really similar to you with the melancholic personality. He was always like that too to everyone except me and I noticed that.

Do you have anyone you trust very much? If yes do you feel like you can be euphoric around them?