Help Wanting to harm myself

[4Kumo7]

I want to do it so much, but I can't even cut myself now. Does anyone know any methods in which I could hurt myself without it having long term effects on my body, like loss of energy on a limb.
And if I do cut myself but not deeply, will it be safe?

 

[onthefence]

Advice from a SH addict- please don't do it.

 

[4Kumo7]

Advice from a SH addict- please don't do it.

Well I've been doing it since I was 13 but stopped and currently am 1 year clean. But I honestly don't see the reason for why I shouldn't cut myself if it's not deep

 

[onthefence]

I still don't recommend it. I quit for over 20 years and started again 2 years ago - was just doing it every few weeks. Now I'm spiraling and doing it daily and causing more damage than I intend. A small cut will give you a few endorphins… then it won't give you any a few times later…. And you will cut just a little deeper… a slippery slope.

 

[4Kumo7]

I still don't recommend it. I quit for over 20 years and started again 2 years ago - was just doing it every few weeks. Now I'm spiraling and doing it daily and causing more damage than I intend. A small cut will give you a few endorphins… then it won't give you any a few times later…. And you will cut just a little deeper… a slippery slope.

I understand where you're coming from, but I wouldn't be able to cut myself deeper than I usually do cause I'm terrified of the sight, as pathetic as that sounds.
20 years is really impressive tho, and I'm sure you still got it in you to stop altogether

 

[onthefence]

Not pathetic at all. Honestly I traded cutting for something less messy but still end up with infections n scars. Unfortunately I can't quit rn. It's one of the things that is keeping me a bit sane.

 

[4Kumo7]

Not pathetic at all. Honestly I traded cutting for something less messy but still end up with infections n scars. Unfortunately I can't quit rn. It's one of the things that is keeping me a bit sane.

It's okay, you should definitely take your time. I can understand how it keeps you sane tho, but just try being safe

 

[onthefence]

I'm trying to be as safe as I can.. so hard to explain why I need more antibiotics…

 

[4Kumo7]

I'm trying to be as safe as I can.. so hard to explain why I need more antibiotics…

I hate explaining myself regarding this, it's scary. The worst part is having to hide the scars so people wouldn't notice

 

[onthefence]

I've been lucky so far.. not anywhere people see. But the fricking dermatologist definitely moved my clothes without asking n saw the scars- thank goodness nothing fresh at that time. I said it was just from a skin infection I couldn't leave alone but we both knew the truth. Told me to use silicone scar tape..

 

[elliottsmith]

I want to do it so much, but I can't even cut myself now. Does anyone know any methods in which I could hurt myself without it having long term effects on my body, like loss of energy on a limb.
And if I do cut myself but not deeply, will it be safe?

I won't tell you what to do,just know that it is as addicting as it gets and once you start you'll probably need more willpower than you'll ever have(considering that you most likely deal with depression,considering this site's demographic) to quit it,I've been struggling with this BS for a long time and every single place I go that has people who struggle with SH they tell you not to do it,hell,even in this pro-choice site,people advise against it.I won't lie,if you are feeling like shit it will feel better for a little while but I want you to know what you are getting yourself into.I know shit must be pretty bad for you rn for you to consider it,been there done that,but please,think it through,I now feel as bad as I felt before starting it but have to deal with both my thoughts and this addiction now.If you need to talk to someone,I'm here.If you read through this and will still do it,don't cut too deep,clean the skin before and after cutting,put a gauze on the wound and apply pressure untill it stops bleeding,don't check the wound very frequently;prioritize sterile stuff to cut and know your anatomy a bit so you don't risk cutting something you didn't mean to

 

[Manaaja]

Take a pillow and throw it around (make sure it doesn't hit anything that can break or fall down) or squeeze it really hard or hug it or scream into it.

 

[4Kumo7]

I've been lucky so far.. not anywhere people see. But the fricking dermatologist definitely moved my clothes without asking n saw the scars- thank goodness nothing fresh at that time. I said it was just from a skin infection I couldn't leave alone but we both knew the truth. Told me to use silicone scar tape..

Cutting somewhere people can't see is safer probably yeah, but I hope that interaction with the dermatologist wasn't TOO uncomfortable, at least she gave you an advice I think
Nobody besides my mom and sister ever noticed, or maybe they did but didn't say anything. My mom noticed only because I flipped out and told her, she wouldn't have noticed otherwise lol

I won't tell you what to do,just know that it is as addicting as it gets and once you start you'll probably need more willpower than you'll ever have(considering that you most likely deal with depression,considering this site's demographic) to quit it,I've been struggling with this BS for a long time and every single place I go that has people who struggle with SH they tell you not to do it,hell,even in this pro-choice site,people advise against it.I won't lie,if you are feeling like shit it will feel better for a little while but I want you to know what you are getting yourself into.I know shit must be pretty bad for you rn for you to consider it,been there done that,but please,think it through,I now feel as bad as I felt before starting it but have to deal with both my thoughts and this addiction now.If you need to talk to someone,I'm here.If you read through this and will still do it,don't cut too deep,clean the skin before and after cutting,put a gauze on the wound and apply pressure untill it stops bleeding,don't check the wound very frequently;prioritize sterile stuff to cut and know your anatomy a bit so you don't risk cutting something you didn't mean to

I know it's addicting, it wouldn't be my first time cutting lol. I had that will power to stop, but it didn't came thanks to my determination alone, somebody's presence was helping me. But now that I cannot see him, I don't find any reasons for why I shouldn't start again, especially since I believe that's what I deserve.
And yes, while it indeed feels better, I like the sight of myself hurting physically as well, idk why, I've been like this since I was around 10 years old, maybe younger.
And thanks for all that you said, it definitely helps ♡

Take a pillow and throw it around (make sure it doesn't hit anything that can break or fall down) or squeeze it really hard or hug it or scream into it.

That could work, but I honestly want something that still hurts me physically