Discussion wanting to CBT but worried of what happens after

[alurem]

didn't know if i was asking for help or starting a discussion but i think this can spark one so discussion it is
i wanna CTB due to my relatively crappy living situation plus the fact that i'm likely to get hate crimed due to me being trans.
my issue is that while i'd like to believe in the whole christianity schtick, and i do, i'm worried that if i'm wrong, it'll be just a black endless void of nothing.
no memories
no feelings
just void
that just seems irrationally scary to my feeble mind, similar to how if someone tried to understand eldritch horrors, they'd go mad
i know there's no stable answer to this but maybe a discussion could help me make up my mind

 

[Vizzy]

didn't know if i was asking for help or starting a discussion but i think this can spark one so discussion it is
i wanna CTB due to my relatively crappy living situation plus the fact that i'm likely to get hate crimed due to me being trans.
my issue is that while i'd like to believe in the whole christianity schtick, and i do, i'm worried that if i'm wrong, it'll be just a black endless void of nothing.
no memories
no feelings
just void
that just seems irrationally scary to my feeble mind, similar to how if someone tried to understand eldritch horrors, they'd go mad
i know there's no stable answer to this but maybe a discussion could help me make up my mind

After death, it is just nothingness!

 

[alurem]

After death, it is just nothingness!

source? i grew up believing in the modern idea of christianity, thankfully i got the internet before my mom convinced me trans people are vermin because i wouldn't want to CTB because of that

 

[cami]

hmm yeah, i know what you mean. i personally feel like my life is already a void, you know? so i guess i just hold on to hope. that something after death will be better and happier and more beautiful than the crappy hand i've been dealt in life. it's all i can do.

 

[alurem]

hmm yeah, i know what you mean. i personally feel like my life is already a void, you know? so i guess i just hold on to hope. that something after death will be better and happier and more beautiful than the crappy hand i've been dealt in life. it's all i can do.

i can't relate entirely as my life isn't empty yet but it feels like i'm reaching the bottom of the barrel, it's the reason i'm asking in the first place.

 

[Vizzy]

source? i grew up believing in the modern idea of christianity, thankfully i got the internet before my mom convinced me trans people are vermin because i wouldn't want to CTB because of that

Source is there is no source

What's your source for afterlife?

No one knows where we came from before our birth and no one knows where we go after we die

All these religions are human made, humans are good in making up stupid things and spreading it to the world, people die everyday and we see it what happens after death still we make up things which doesn't make sense

We born, live and die then become the part of the earth, it's just a cycle of life which is same like animals but humans just take it to extreme

 

[alurem]

Source is there is no source

What's your source for afterlife?

No one knows where we came from before our birth and no one knows where we go after we die

All these religions are human made, humans are good in making up stupid things and spreading it to the world, people die everyday and we see it what happens after death still we make up things which doesn't make sense

We born, live and die then become the part of the earth, it's just a cycle of life which is same like animals but humans just take it to extreme

i'm mostly just holding onto the fact that i was taught my religion therefore i'm biased towards it, i just can't let go of it easily

 

[cami]

i can't relate entirely as my life isn't empty yet but it feels like i'm reaching the bottom of the barrel, it's the reason i'm asking in the first place.

hope you find the answers and peace you desire my love.

 

[leftdreaming]

I can't imagine there being an afterlife or at least not an afterlife like the ones religions speak of. Whatever it is, I'll be facing it eventually so I just don't think about it. For your sake, I hope the afterlife is all you want it to be and that maybe in one way or another we will meet on the other side.

Nothingness is scary in its own way, but we've experienced that before, right?

 

[magician99]

I'm not religious because there is no proof that God exists and the bible was written by a bunch of humans who knew even less than what is currently known. With that being said, NDes exist and they vary from person to person. Some say that their NDE was peaceful, some say that it was scary, some say that it was nothing. It's different for everyone. And I have a hard time believing that every person who talked about their NDE is just some attention-seeking person.

Interesting fact: "A highly-cited 2018 study provided participants with low doses of the hallucinogenic drug N,N-dimethyltryptamine (DMT) in a controlled setting, then asked them to describe their experience. Their descriptions were uncannily similar to collected descriptions of NDEs. It turns out that DMT is widely present in the mammalian brain. In 2019, researchers at the University of Michigan not only found the compound in various locations in rat brains, but they also discovered neurons with the two enzymes required to make it. Moreover, the neurons seem to produce DMT at levels comparable to those of other key neurotransmitters like dopamine, which drives pleasure, and serotonin, which stabilizes mood. DMT has also been found in small amounts in human brain tissue and larger amounts in cerebrospinal fluid, a clear fluid that surrounds the brain and spinal cord."

DMT seemingly floods the human brain at death and causes vivid dreams and NDEs. So if death is some sort of DMT trip we don't come back from, then a afterlife could exist.

So what awaits us after death is either what we believe happens (this would explain why NDEs vary from person to person), or nothingness. Even if it turns out to be nothingness, we can't experience that either way, so there is nothing to be concerned about. You would never be able to tell what's going on, it would be like sleeping without ever waking up.

 

[Praestat_Mori]

Religion is man made and nobody knows what really comes after death, except from persons who reported about their NDE we could never ask someone who really did the last and final step to the other side.

I look at this from a physical point of view and there is ofc no scientific evidence for that, just my thoughts. We don't know what "life" itself is, it's called "soul/mind/energy of life" that makes as able to think to make decisions to understand things, that we exist and so on. We don't know what really is behind it and why it is there. So probably after death the "energy of life" will leave the body and will reunite with the cosmic web that is throught the cosmos and probably beyond it (To me it's also somehow nothingness). The body, a cluster of atoms, will stay on earth and decays. That's it.

 

[BlackNails]

I grew up very christian.
For all childhood and till the end of my teens
Its nice to believe there is some "holy land" after,
but IMHO the only peace after is the nothingness.
Its scary now, to think of it then, but when the time comes, you cant even feel anymore.

People think nothingness as in "balck" when you close your eyes. But its much less than that. It is truly no existence.
Source: idk speaking with my finger up my ass.

 

[Lost Magic]

It really depends on what you believe in tbh. Nobody really knows the secrets of what comes after death (despite what they may tell you). Having said that a lot of people who have had near-death experiences or have taken DMT claim that the afterlife is nothing to fear. We are made out of living energy so that energy either dies with our body or it lives on someplace else. It's all up for interpretation. These bodies will surely die, at some point in our lives. I just see death as a natural progression of life and whatever happens afterward is an adventure.

 

[catharspiral]

This is why I read NDEs. I've always been filled with curiosity about the afterlife, and it gives peace to believe that maybe I (whatever remains of me) won't float in a dark void for eternity and might instead feel truly loved for once at the end of the line, as many NDErs describe. What calls to you without inciting even the tiniest bit of fear deep down is your truth, your resonating bell

 

[BornHated]

Oh, yeah. I can relate to the feeling of dread about what can come after.
On my end all I suspect is that consciousness is transferred over in some way I can't understand, and that's kind of what I'm afraid of. I do believe in an RNG style reincarnation and fellas I must say I'm not looking forward to a life cycle as some cow in a slaughterhouse or ungulate prey animal in Africa or something.

I'm the opposite in that I do want nothingness. I don't remember anything when I sleep- that's what I want it to feel like. Had I the ability, I'd jettison my dying body and remains into a deep-space cosmic trip with no chance of being reborn as a bacteria or anything again.

 

[blacksand]

the same thing which happens to someone who was never born at all because their parents never met. Nothing because they don't exist.

 

[FuneralCry]

I very strongly believe that we just cease existing after this, and for me such a thing is incredibly comforting. To be completely unaware of this disgusting and hellish existence and to be unable to suffer for all eternity is the best thing possible, I only fear existing here as there is unlimited potential for torture in this world, and death is finally freedom from everything, to die returns one back to the ideal state of non-existence. I just see existence as being a horrific, tragic mistake in the first place, it's the true problem which can only be solved by ceasing to exist.

I personally don't see existence as being desirable in any way, I don't understand the appeal to any kind of existence, only nothingness is perfection to me.

 

[Forever Sleep]

I guess I just think if it's nothingness- then it's like where we were before we were born. We didn't feel scared or alone or bored- we didn't feel anything. I hope that death will be the same. Like falling to sleep- feeling your consciousness drift away and then- just not waking up again. No perception of time. No knowledge of how long you've been out of it. Peacefulness... Hopefully

 

[EternalShore]

Sorry about them all just going your religion and lushing atheism and stuff. :( This community tends to be very much that way, and it sucks! >_<
Also, am also gender dysphoric and Christian! :D Teehee~ There are few like us, but it's definitely nice to see! ^_^
Anyways, we'll probably only know for sure if they're right about all that stuff once we die which is a little too late but oh well.
Please look into logical proofs for God (my favorite is Aquinas's 5 ways) or all of the evidence for the resurrection of Jesus if you do have doubts. :)
That being said, I'm personally far more worried about possibly getting sent to Hell for CTB'ing! >_< Luckily, God doesn't say anywhere directly in the Bible that you'll go to Hell for it, but it is still a worry of mine. :(

 

[isitjustme]

didn't know if i was asking for help or starting a discussion but i think this can spark one so discussion it is
i wanna CTB due to my relatively crappy living situation plus the fact that i'm likely to get hate crimed due to me being trans.
my issue is that while i'd like to believe in the whole christianity schtick, and i do, i'm worried that if i'm wrong, it'll be just a black endless void of nothing.
no memories
no feelings
just void
that just seems irrationally scary to my feeble mind, similar to how if someone tried to understand eldritch horrors, they'd go mad
i know there's no stable answer to this but maybe a discussion could help me make up my mind

I would suggest watching a Yale course called "Death". It's available on YouTube and tackles a lot of what you mentioned in your post.
They discuss philosophical and religious points of view as well. I understand you are religious and I know for a fact the professor is atheist but he is pretty neutral, the course is not about proving who is right but rather stops at just presenting all the available points of view. Though me being atheist and you not, maybe I am not well equipped to say for sure if you'll have the same experience. In any case give it a try, I certainly came out of that course a lot more informed of how humans view and deal with death.

Here is the link to the entire course:

 

[oh_no191]

I like to believe the afterlife is whatever you dream it to be. If you think there's a heaven, there's a heaven. A void? Then there's a void. Reincarnation? Then you'll get reincarnated. It keeps me stable. If I want a never ending explorable world I'll get one. Whatever you dream of will be a reality. (This is my personal view on it)

 

[yellowroses]

didn't know if i was asking for help or starting a discussion but i think this can spark one so discussion it is
i wanna CTB due to my relatively crappy living situation plus the fact that i'm likely to get hate crimed due to me being trans.
my issue is that while i'd like to believe in the whole christianity schtick, and i do, i'm worried that if i'm wrong, it'll be just a black endless void of nothing.
no memories
no feelings
just void
that just seems irrationally scary to my feeble mind, similar to how if someone tried to understand eldritch horrors, they'd go mad
i know there's no stable answer to this but maybe a discussion could help me make up m

didn't know if i was asking for help or starting a discussion but i think this can spark one so discussion it is
i wanna CTB due to my relatively crappy living situation plus the fact that i'm likely to get hate crimed due to me being trans.
my issue is that while i'd like to believe in the whole christianity schtick, and i do, i'm worried that if i'm wrong, it'll be just a black endless void of nothing.
no memories
no feelings
just void
that just seems irrationally scary to my feeble mind, similar to how if someone tried to understand eldritch horrors, they'd go mad
i know there's no stable answer to this but maybe a discussion could help me make up my mind

Hi! I'm also trans! Personally I think our own beliefs decide what happens after, but I also don't think nothingness is anything to be afraid of either. Think about before you were born, it would be just like that.

 

[alurem]

Sorry about them all just going your religion and lushing atheism and stuff. :( This community tends to be very much that way, and it sucks! >_<
Also, am also gender dysphoric and Christian! :D Teehee~ There are few like us, but it's definitely nice to see! ^_^
Anyways, we'll probably only know for sure if they're right about all that stuff once we die which is a little too late but oh well.
Please look into logical proofs for God (my favorite is Aquinas's 5 ways) or all of the evidence for the resurrection of Jesus if you do have doubts. :)
That being said, I'm personally far more worried about possibly getting sent to Hell for CTB'ing! >_< Luckily, God doesn't say anywhere directly in the Bible that you'll go to Hell for it, but it is still a worry of mine. :(

i mean if it helps you any the only real thing that gets you to heaven is believing that jesus died on the cross for our sins and a belief that the god mentioned in the bible is the one and only true god, so as long as you've got those check marks down, you'll go to heaven (assuming it exists)

I like to believe the afterlife is whatever you dream it to be. If you think there's a heaven, there's a heaven. A void? Then there's a void. Reincarnation? Then you'll get reincarnated. It keeps me stable. If I want a never ending explorable world I'll get one. Whatever you dream of will be a reality. (This is my personal view on it)

so like damnerung from the SCP community?

 

[EternalShore]

i mean if it helps you any the only real thing that gets you to heaven is believing that jesus died on the cross for our sins and a belief that the god mentioned in the bible is the one and only true god, so as long as you've got those check marks down, you'll go to heaven (assuming it exists)

Thank you :) It does! :D Now, that I recall, last year, my denomination had a conference meeting on ctb and sh, I went to it, and it was actually extremely progressive and empathetic (shocking considering most people's views on it)! ^_^ They even mentioned how people who do ctb are more than likely going to Heaven because we are saved by faith in the gospel, not by our faith in life.