I have zero happiness in me. It's not depression or anything for me just been through so much in life that things don't make me happy. I don't think I'm capable of happiness anymore. I only look for a content feeling. I personally take kratom which is very low dose opioids. I found it to work better than alcohol to get me through the day and helps with my bad heart problem. There is one thing that makes me happy and that's helping others. Been a caregiver for many years, helped my dogs and now going to work at a senior citizen home on monday. If I can't make myself happy, I try to with others.
In june I had those same marks on my neck and tried so many other ways to ease my suffering. One day my heart will give though and I get to see my loved ones who have passed before which is the only thing I look forward to.
I don't know why I'm saying this. just trying to let you know we are here with you. Also, for some reason many people such as myself just can't hang. Many have experienced this. I had those some marks around my neck in june.