took you all with me to work today

[cemeteryismyhome]

I got out of bed this morning, got ready for work, went to work, faked my way through the day which is always exhausting, blending in and hiding who I really am. And all day long I thought about people who've posted here, who simply can't do any of that due to depression and other things. I think I'm just in an animated outer shell that keeps moving although I'm dead inside. Being able to fake a mostly "normal" life doesn't bring me fulfillment or happiness. It feels like being dragged over broken glass and razor blades. It feels dishonest.

 

[bankai]

Pretty much the same here. I go to a job daily as well. It's just faking my way through and shaking hands and smiling. Exhausting. Mentally. Physically. No joy. Just dreary monotony.

All to get paid so I can live a life I hate.

 

[apearl]

ohhh boy same here, even worse I'm a have a minimum wage job that requires a lot of social interaction so I can't rest the facade for even a minute till the shift is over, and these are about 9 hour shifts.

After my shift today I cried in my car for like 10 minutes before going home because im so exhausted of it all.

 

[wantingdignity]

I can relate to the feeling of not really feeling like you are in your body and like you're just going through the motions.

Do you think your feelings are a sign that you need something to change? Or just something you have to go through until the feeling passes?

 

[Unbearable Mr. Bear]

My job isn't grueling. I'm thankful to have it and the people inside try their best to accommodate things for me. But yes, sometimes I feel like a flesh golem doing the daily program every day

 

[Pluto]

 

[nobody_oac]

It's a horrible feeling. I did it for two decades before I couldn't deal with it anymore. I want to do something, but last time I tried, I quit on the third day and slept in the car because I couldn't face the family.