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Fantasy22

Member
May 10, 2024
60
I made the drink and I tried to drink it but I couldn't finish it it was really bad. I still dunno if I wanna die or not I think I'm tired tired of being alive would rather die and get it over with. I feel my heart racing but I don't know if it will kill me. I was trying to ctb but it was so bad and I'm on the fence anyways. Did I make a mistake. Will I die soon? Or just be sick it's was so small an amount I took
My heart is racing but I don't know if it's the sn or the ctb attempt adrenaline but before my heart wasn't racing before I just felt numb.
Maybe if I take another sip and slowly drink it? Like do I have to chug it. It was so salty and kinda chemically like chlorine. I put it in the freezer for some reason for like day and it didn't freeze isn't that weird
 
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Fantasy22

Member
May 10, 2024
60
I think I'll take another sip and see what happens. I didn't take meto today but I have been fasting and I took some earlier this week
Do you play games ?? Any mobile apps or desktop
Do you play games ?? Any mobile apps or desktop
not really, I played marvel rivals yesterday with a coworker for the first time yesterday
I feel like bile in my throat I think. I'm not sick but there's like a tightness kinda. I had another sip it's like 1/3 or maybe 1/2 way gone. I'm more used to the taste so it was easier this time it's still so salty tho I can handle salt so it's not that bad but I'm so thirsty now
My stomach hurts now a bit, not bad. Actually I think I can feel it getting worse. Should I make myself throw up right now. I don't think I want to die I just don't wan to live either. I jsut want to stop suffering and to me living is suffering. I feel my heart a lot now
 
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Fantasy22

Member
May 10, 2024
60
I think I'll just lay down and see how a half portion does to me. If the universe wants me to die I'll die. Leave it up to god if I believe in it. My heart is racing so much it's not painful tho I don't mind it really
 
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9uerencia

9uerencia

New Member
Jun 4, 2025
3
I think I'll just lay down and see how a half portion does to me. If the universe wants me to die I'll die. Leave it up to god if I believe in it. My heart is racing so much it's not painful tho I don't mind it really
please keep updating if you can
i'm here with you, OP
 
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Fantasy22

Member
May 10, 2024
60
I made myself throw up but I dunno if that was enough
 
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suicidenow

Member
Jul 20, 2024
16
OP are you okay?
 
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opheliaoveragain

opheliaoveragain

Eating Disordered Junkie
Jun 2, 2024
2,046
checking in on you, OP. ❤️
 
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