Some of you may have read my posts before, I have wanted to CTB for a while and I have settled on the SN method and ordered it 4 weeks ago, it still hasn't come and it's making me anxious and irritable. I suffer from severe depression and people are starting to notice, I panicked a few weeks ago and irrationally tried to CTB without thinking it through properly and it ended in a failed attempt, plus because of what I had taken I was missing for over 24 hours and the fallout has been horrendous still now 3 weeks later. Because I wasn't found for so long so many people thought that I must be dead, but when I was found and news got round, people were initially just pleased I was ok, but it has now turned to anger and frustration a few people just can't talk to me anymore and others that are say how bad it would make everyone feel if I wasn't here! It went viral in my area in the media and the police searched where I worked and now everybody knows about the state of the mind! I'm also now being watched closely and trying to be persuaded to give life a chance, but I don't know how too!! I'm just so tired and fed up, and putting on a front is so difficult! I'm a bit anxious about the SN because if I attempt it I just can't fail again!! People will not tolerate what happened a few weeks ago again!! I just don't know what to do anymore!!
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OMG!!!! I am 100% the same as you. Quick background. Was hired on 10.05 and fired on 10.09, yes the same week. I was NOT getting the training fast enough so I was let go. NOW it got all over the place and I was fired at 9 am and the cops were knocking on my door at 3pm. The crappy company fired me THEN called the cops and said I was suicidal!! Oh yes it got around everywhere! For me, THE HELL WITH THEM! I feel so much for you as you are my twin, I know that you are a loving,caring person and to have others look at you SUCKS! Please remember we are here for you, and we care and love you and you have the support of ALL of us period! all the love an empathy in the world to you my global family member!
GoodPersonEffed
Brevity is my middle name, but my name was TL
- Jan 11, 2020
- 6,728
It's hard to know how to help. When you attempted, you were adamant you'd thought it through and were not open to feedback, your mind was made up. I didn't think it was a good idea, but I chose to respect your stated boundaries and didn't object or try to change your mind.
The only thing I can suggest is to notice who here gives you sound advice, ask for it before acting, and give credence to their advice...even when whatever pushes you to do irrational things or things that are self-defeating tries to push you to do so.
I hope that helps.
Silvermorning
The polar bears made me do it
- Oct 10, 2020
- 214
Go easy on yourself, nothing major is gonna change if you postpone things a week or two , isn't it? Don't pay too much attention to the people in your town, we are all gonna end up being worm food anyway, life is just a temporary nuisance, thankfully.
It arrived this morning!!
Thank you, My Sn arrived this morning. Is it a sign?
Thank you, sorry to hear your in the same place.OMG!!!! I am 100% the same as you. Quick background. Was hired on 10.05 and fired on 10.09, yes the same week. I was NOT getting the training fast enough so I was let go. NOW it got all over the place and I was fired at 9 am and the cops were knocking on my door at 3pm. The crappy company fired me THEN called the cops and said I was suicidal!! Oh yes it got around everywhere! For me, THE HELL WITH THEM! I feel so much for you as you are my twin, I know that you are a loving,caring person and to have others look at you SUCKS! Please remember we are here for you, and we care and love you and you have the support of ALL of us period! all the love an empathy in the world to you my global family member!
GoodPersonEffed
Brevity is my middle name, but my name was TL
- Jan 11, 2020
- 6,728
You're welcome.
I don't believe in signs. You ordered it, and it's arrived.
I'm concerned about you posting photos. Did you remove the exif data? Since all that drama with the police, it possible anyone is monitoring you being on this site?
I read something about toxic codependency the other day.
When one person doesn't do what they want to do because they are worried about hurting other peoples feelings.
Apparently it leads to an exploding doormat personality.
People making you feel guilty are contributing to that kind of relationship, and making things worse.
When one person doesn't do what they want to do because they are worried about hurting other peoples feelings.
Apparently it leads to an exploding doormat personality.
People making you feel guilty are contributing to that kind of relationship, and making things worse.
