Thought of me being ctb is comforting to me.. is it odd?

[User00]

Thought of just being gone is comforting to me. All that pain suffering of being alive is no more for me. Once everyone is away for a week I'll be able to ctb on co method.
I'll probably also do SN method just to be on the safe side or some other method that i can have access to. I just want to finally leave in peace.

 

[Huntfish34]

I don't think it's odd at all. Even though it can often scare the shitt out of me....... it also brings a sense of peace and serenity. I certainly understand what you mean.

 

[User00]

I don't think it's odd at all. Even though it can often scare the shitt out of me....... it also brings a sense of peace and serenity. I certainly understand what you mean.

Im not afraid, i am really brave and i can go through with it but its the SI that would probably affect me.

 

[FuneralCry]

I think that it makes sense to feel so comforted by the thought of permanently exiting this world that we were so cruelly forced into. I see suicide as being self care as it's the only way to prevent all suffering and solve all problems in a world where there is unlimited potential to be tormented. I very strongly believe that we just cease to exist after this, and to me this is something so beautiful. Death is true peace which cannot be found through existing, it sounds so ideal to me being completely unaware of everything, I hope that you find the freedom that you are searching for.

 

[outrider567]

Thought of just being gone is comforting to me. All that pain suffering of being alive is no more for me. Once everyone is away for a week I'll be able to ctb on co method.
I'll probably also do SN method just to be on the safe side or some other method that i can have access to. I just want to finally leave in peace.

Comforting to me also, no more suffering and sadness then, from her loss--not to mention I had two separate nightmares about her last night

 

[scamper]

I think that's pretty normal. Personally, knowing that I have the option to ctb available to me also puts me at ease. It's liberating and comforting knowing I'm able to finish my life on my chosen date, and I feel for those who are in situations that make it hard to ctb when they want.

 

[FailerQt.]

Imho, it is not odd. The only reason I can keep "going" nowadays and appear alright in from of the world is that I constantly keep reminding and confronting myself about that I just need to last a little bit longer (until I have enough money for my chosen method) and I'm gone. Should definitely be before end of this year.

 

[N33dT0D13]

Honestly, I'd imagine many people here feel that way, and even if were are in the overwhelming minority, the feeling is still valid. I've even heard people who (I think) aren't suicidal or depressed express comfort in the idea of being gone. I personally agree with Huntfish34 in that it both terrifies and comforts me.

 

[User00]

Imho, it is not odd. The only reason I can keep "going" nowadays and appear alright in from of the world is that I constantly keep reminding and confronting myself about that I just need to last a little bit longer (until I have enough money for my chosen method) and I'm gone. Should definitely be before end of this year.

I go about my day to day life not out of choice, i have to, but i still think of unaliving myself during the night. i think well at least the closest thing i have is sleep for now. I feel sorry majority of the people here feel death is the only answer and if the world wasnt so awful it would be different. Im also thinking i wont be around for long, i want to go this year exactly.