ibuprofen_ninja

ibuprofen_ninja

Member
Oct 26, 2021
82
what form of hanging were you using, and how did it end up failing? did you do any lasting damage? how do you feel being alive today, have things changed at all for you? did failing make you want to switch methods, and if so what is your method of choice?
 
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DyingToDie123

DyingToDie123

she/her
Oct 25, 2023
385
- Partial, multiple times
- I don't know if it was SI or I just have incompatible bodily anatomy. I suspect the latter.
- No lasting damage
- I still very much want to die lol
- I'm probably going to try some other methods but I still have the rope in case I get desperate again.
 
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ibuprofen_ninja

ibuprofen_ninja

Member
Oct 26, 2021
82
- Partial, multiple times
- I don't know if it was SI or I just have incompatible bodily anatomy. I suspect the latter.
- No lasting damage
- I still very much want to die lol
- I'm probably going to try some other methods but I still have the rope in case I get desperate again.
so you survived without anyone finding you/'rescuing' you?
 
DyingToDie123

DyingToDie123

she/her
Oct 25, 2023
385
t

you mean to say you backed out at the last second?
I never even got to the point where I felt like I was going to pass out. I just kneeled there uncomfortably for a while, adjusting each time to hopefully hit the sweet spot but always failing.

It's very possible I didn't put enough pressure on due to SI or the rope being too long or something. I never figured it out.
 
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ibuprofen_ninja

ibuprofen_ninja

Member
Oct 26, 2021
82
I never even got to the point where I felt like I was going to pass out. I just kneeled there uncomfortably for a while, adjusting each time to hopefully hit the sweet spot but always failing.

It's very possible I didn't put enough pressure on due to SI or the rope being too long or something. I never figured it out.
well it's both good and bad that you're still here I guess. in fairness it took me a few goes at working things out before I found my "sweet spot" and I guess there are a number of other factors that can effect it
 
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carac

carac

"and if this is the end, i am glad i met you."
May 27, 2023
1,111
Same, partial mulitiple times but unable to pass out despite being determined.
 
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ibuprofen_ninja

ibuprofen_ninja

Member
Oct 26, 2021
82
Same, partial mulitiple times but unable to pass out despite being determined.

do you think that result lends itself to the wrong technique, or the wrong position, wrong equipment, something like that?
 
willitpass

willitpass

Donā€™t try to offer me help, Iā€™ve tried everything
Mar 10, 2020
2,941
I did partial. I would pass out instantly and wake back up standing. My unconscious body was fighting so hard I would stand up to ease the pressure. I passed out 7-10 times before the pressure in my head was so excruciating I couldn't put enough pressure on my neck to pass out again. I strongly believe if I had somehow managed to lean into the rope one more time I would have died. I had a very bad bloody nose. My head hurt for days. My legs had gone numb so I called my family for help and ended up in the hospital. I was lucky that I did not sustain any damage other than I developed mild tics after that I still have to this day. Unconscious SI is a beast. The body will fight tooth and nail to live.
 
ibuprofen_ninja

ibuprofen_ninja

Member
Oct 26, 2021
82
I did partial. I would pass out instantly and wake back up standing. My unconscious body was fighting so hard I would stand up to ease the pressure. I passed out 7-10 times before the pressure in my head was so excruciating I couldn't put enough pressure on my neck to pass out again. I strongly believe if I had somehow managed to lean into the rope one more time I would have died. I had a very bad bloody nose. My head hurt for days. My legs had gone numb so I called my family for help and ended up in the hospital. I was lucky that I did not sustain any damage other than I developed mild tics after that I still have to this day. Unconscious SI is a beast. The body will fight tooth and nail to live.
I can relate to the limb numbing, within a few seconds my body loses feeling and my limbs start spasming. I think you had the right spot, but it's like you said you have to stop your body resisting somehow.
 
willitpass

willitpass

Donā€™t try to offer me help, Iā€™ve tried everything
Mar 10, 2020
2,941
I can relate to the limb numbing, within a few seconds my body loses feeling and my limbs start spasming. I think you had the right spot, but it's like you said you have to stop your body resisting somehow.
I didn't have that experience as I went fully unconscious instantly. When I say I couldn't feel my legs by the end it was just loss of sensation in my legs probably due to disrupted spinal fluid and blood. I was never awake for the spasming or anything like that. I would lean into it, instantly pass out, then wake up standing.
 
FadingDawn

FadingDawn

Experienced
Jul 18, 2023
262
I tried partial, multiple times; and, as earlier people have said, I couldn't black out despite trying to kneel down and re-adjust the material around my neck several, maybe it was SI, weakness, possible a good of trouble from bodily anatomy; might try again; still very much desirous of death... I feel weak, and wobbly, and uncertain in the head following some attempts; but I'm not sure, and don't think, I sustained lasting or long-term damage, and unsure if those effects were from the physical or emotional aspects of the attempt.
 
ibuprofen_ninja

ibuprofen_ninja

Member
Oct 26, 2021
82
I didn't have that experience as I went fully unconscious instantly. When I say I couldn't feel my legs by the end it was just loss of sensation in my legs probably due to disrupted spinal fluid and blood. I was never awake for the spasming or anything like that. I would lean into it, instantly pass out, then wake up standing.
aren't you lucky :ahhha: when I do it I start to lose feeling my limbs jerk like I said, and then my vision fades to grey
does your vision fade to grey? maybe we're pressing different spots
 
willitpass

willitpass

Donā€™t try to offer me help, Iā€™ve tried everything
Mar 10, 2020
2,941
aren't you lucky :ahhha: when I do it I start to lose feeling my limbs jerk like I said, and then my vision fades to grey
does your vision fade to grey? maybe we're pressing different spots
I leaned directly into my right carotid. This was years and years ago, I was only 13, but from what I remember as well as my journal entry recounts at the time, I passed out literally instantly. Not even a second to think. Just out.
 
ibuprofen_ninja

ibuprofen_ninja

Member
Oct 26, 2021
82
I leaned directly into my right carotid. This was years and years ago, I was only 13, but from what I remember as well as my journal entry recounts at the time, I passed out literally instantly. Not even a second to think. Just out.
I don't really know what spot I'm compressing, all I know is that the rope goes right underneath the jaw
 
carac

carac

"and if this is the end, i am glad i met you."
May 27, 2023
1,111
do you think that result lends itself to the wrong technique, or the wrong position, wrong equipment, something like that?
Possibly, first time I tried I got really close to passing out but I was kneeling really low and it was a big strain on my thighs to just stay in that position but it probably was a better one. following attempts I shortened the distance so I was kneeling upright and wasn't able to apply as much pressure so proably wasn't as effective.
 
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ibuprofen_ninja

ibuprofen_ninja

Member
Oct 26, 2021
82
Possibly, first time I tried I got really close to passing out but I was kneeling really low and it was a big strain on my thighs to just stay in that position but it probably was a better one. following attempts I shortened the distance so I was kneeling upright and wasn't able to apply as much pressure so proably wasn't as effective.
man, so many factors to consider. that was one of the things putting me off of partial, kinda seems like I'll stand up the minute it starts to feel uncomfortable or painful
 
carac

carac

"and if this is the end, i am glad i met you."
May 27, 2023
1,111
man, so many factors to consider. that was one of the things putting me off of partial, kinda seems like I'll stand up the minute it starts to feel uncomfortable or painful
Yea I think either consciously or unconsciously it's very easy to resist
 
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C

changes

Member
Nov 25, 2023
18
Would someone mind confirming please whether you should then lean backwards or forwards when in a kneeling position for partial?
 
ibuprofen_ninja

ibuprofen_ninja

Member
Oct 26, 2021
82
Partial is tried more often but has a SIGNIFICANTLY higher rate of failure than full suspension.
really? think I know which one I'm going for then, cheers
Would someone mind confirming please whether you should then lean backwards or forwards when in a kneeling position for partial?
last time I tested the method I leant forward with the noose knot at the back of my head
 
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D

DeliveryMan105

Member
Apr 24, 2024
5
- I tried the hanging position where you are squatting and then let your weight collapse
- I used a rope, carabiner used for rock climbing and a weight lifting belt for my neck. The piece of metal on the belt gave out and broke with the carabiner. If I had just used the rope + belt I wouldn't be here. I instantly blacked out I have no idea how much I was there for I estimate 1-5 minutes but regaining consciousness was one of the worst things ever I swear I would have jumped of a building or used a gun if it was in front of me.
- No damage from what I can tell. Life hasn't changed my health is still in bad condition
- No, failing did not make me want to change method I will still use it but if I do it I will make sure no mistakes happen this time around.
 
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ibuprofen_ninja

ibuprofen_ninja

Member
Oct 26, 2021
82
- I tried the hanging position where you are squatting and then let your weight collapse
- I used a rope, carabiner used for rock climbing and a weight lifting belt for my neck. The piece of metal on the belt gave out and broke with the carabiner. If I had just used the rope + belt I wouldn't be here. I instantly blacked out I have now idea how much I was there for I estimate 1-5 minutes but regaining consciousness was one of the worst things ever I swear I would have jumped of a building or used a gun if it was in front of me.
- No damage from what I can tell. Life hasn't changed my health is still in bad condition
- No, failing did not make me want to change method I will still use it but if I do it I will make sure no mistakes happen this time around.
I take it your health was in a bad state prior to the attempt? also, did your order your rope online?
 
D

DeliveryMan105

Member
Apr 24, 2024
5
I take it your health was in a bad state prior to the attempt? also, did your order your rope online?
Yes my health was bad before the attempt but surviving that made me go a little longer because I couldn't believe I survived it and actually did it. Like many I was struggling to find a position where I easily pass out but once I found it I was out like a switch everything just became darkness. And yes everything I used was ordered off Amazon actually.
 
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ibuprofen_ninja

ibuprofen_ninja

Member
Oct 26, 2021
82
Yes my health was bad before the attempt but surviving that made me go a little longer because I couldn't believe I survived it and actually did it. Like many I was struggling to find a position where I easily pass out but once I found it I was out like a switch everything just became darkness. And yes everything I used was ordered off Amazon actually.
well I hope that in spite of your health you're feeling relatively okay
 
T

Tremy

New Member
Apr 24, 2024
1
I tried to hang myself about 9 years ago (partial). But basically I got too scared and didn't go through with it.

What I did was attach a dog leash to the top of a door and wrapped the other end around my neck so that it would self tighten as I stopped standing. I was testing it out and as soon as I allowed myself to sink down to the ground I began to pass out (vision went dim), so I figured it would definitely work.

Said some final prayers and went to finish the job.. but I couldn't repeat the process properly. Now every time I tried instead of feeling like passing out I just felt HUGE PRESSURE in my head! I'm not sure what changed since everything seemed exactly the same. Same position, different results.

Well I kept trying to do it anyways, despite the pressure, and eventually the pain just got to be too much for me and my nose started bleeding (a lot). Still no signs of passing out. So I just gave up because of not being able to reproduce the initial results.

Ever since then I get random, sudden sharp pains (only) inside the right side of my head, and occasional numbness on the outside (like the top of my scalp and right side of my face) but the doctors tell me they can't find anything wrong (CT and MRI scans are supposedly normal). Pretty sure I must have damaged some kind of blood vessel in there though.

I tried twice more since then, but the same thing kept happening with the pressure and headache and nosebleeds. And I just don't want to keep doing more damage anymore for fear of getting a stroke or something one day.

Some things in my life got better and some things got worse. But I guess overall I'm glad I didn't succeed (would have missed a lot). I continue to make a lot of mistakes, but it's weird because the things that used to bother me back then don't really do that anymore. Or not nearly as much at least. Like I had basically wanted to kill myself over a girl, but now I don't really care about that sort of thing anymore. And if I were able to travel back in time to tell the past me that "in the FUTURE you won't feel like this" I really doubt the past me would believe the current me. It would just seem unimaginable.
 
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ibuprofen_ninja

ibuprofen_ninja

Member
Oct 26, 2021
82
I tried to hang myself about 9 years ago (partial). But basically I got too scared and didn't go through with it.

What I did was attach a dog leash to the top of a door and wrapped the other end around my neck so that it would self tighten as I stopped standing. I was testing it out and as soon as I allowed myself to sink down to the ground I began to pass out (vision went dim), so I figured it would definitely work.

Said some final prayers and went to finish the job.. but I couldn't repeat the process properly. Now every time I tried instead of feeling like passing out I just felt HUGE PRESSURE in my head! I'm not sure what changed since everything seemed exactly the same. Same position, different results.

Well I kept trying to do it anyways, despite the pressure, and eventually the pain just got to be too much for me and my nose started bleeding (a lot). Still no signs of passing out. So I just gave up because of not being able to reproduce the initial results.

Ever since then I get random, sudden sharp pains (only) inside the right side of my head, and occasional numbness on the outside (like the top of my scalp and right side of my face) but the doctors tell me they can't find anything wrong (CT and MRI scans are supposedly normal). Pretty sure I must have damaged some kind of blood vessel in there though.

I tried twice more since then, but the same thing kept happening with the pressure and headache and nosebleeds. And I just don't want to keep doing more damage anymore for fear of getting a stroke or something one day.

Some things in my life got better and some things got worse. But I guess overall I'm glad I didn't succeed (would have missed a lot). I continue to make a lot of mistakes, but it's weird because the things that used to bother me back then don't really do that anymore. Or not nearly as much at least. Like I had basically wanted to kill myself over a girl, but now I don't really care about that sort of thing anymore. And if I were able to travel back in time to tell the past me that "in the FUTURE you won't feel like this" I really doubt the past me would believe the current me. It would just seem unimaginable.
I get that problem too, like I've planned out my end a number of times over the past year but once or twice when I was sure I was gonna do it I hesitated right at the moment I could have done it. Fear of the pain used to be a thing, but I've practiced my methods enough now that I know I can do it relatively pain free. Just waiting for a day when I'm absolutely ready to leave the world behind, which'll hopefully be soon. Thanks for responding anyway, I'm glad you're at a place where you feel better.
 

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