Venting Thinking bout ctb even when I'm ok

[think.like]

I don't understand myself. I had a wonderful day and now I'm thinking bout how much I wanna die. I don't think it will ever be okay if even on a day like this these thoughts come back. I just want them to stop

 

[lightningwallcloud]

Hey it makes sense to me. I've started to see "good days" as just a brief distraction from the pain of this life. I think it's normal to have good moments/distractions but still ultimately see that you want out.

 

[FF777]

well i mean, when the funness of what was happening earlier in the day ends then it kind of makes the "nothingness" of any thing happening any more seem kind of like a bummer.. at least you had the fun at all, and you can keep thinking about that for now..

for me day time just generally makes me feel better, and then night time kind of makes me more depressed a little, so i wonder if that has any thing to do with it too..

 

[plskilme]

Me too honestly.