The reasons why this week im going to CTB

[Sageiois]

This is going to be kind of long so i dont expect yall to read this fully but still

So lets start off with recent events.
I was in training to be a truck driver in the US and while i was on the road i found out my fiance was cheating on me with online people since the day i left
Im fixing to loose this job because they learned of my SH habits and saw the scars, put me in a hotel (where supriss suprise i sh again) and now im on a bus back to the company so they can let me go and send me back home
Home, i live with my parents now and i sleep on the couch in the living room. They use me for money because of drug problems they have and since i dont have a room i have no privacy to anything
We got, or should i say they got evicted because of said drug problems and used me to pay for rent, ended up buying drugs.
Before that in my teenage years i was physically and mentally abused by family members and attempted CTB (mixed otc medication, almost worked)
Theres more details that i wont put here because it wont matter by the end of this week, or mid way through it
Im 22 m in the US, j reside in texas and texas will be my resting place. I just want to feel peace

 

[FuneralCry]

To me it's so awful how many humans are so unnecessarily cruel and just create way more suffering. But anyway I hope that you eventually find the freedom you search for, best wishes.

 

[Meteora]

I'm so sorry..... I will never understand why some people get to bear so much while others have an easy life. I m tempted to say, you re only 22, give it another try.... but I know how it feels... the break-up, the lack of support, the auto-aggression......
May you find the peace you wish for. You deserve it.