The Official 2020 Everything But The Kitchen Sink Post

[Carina]

What is your warning?

Going to sound weird, but almost like I need to sneeze in my eyes, and they produce extra fluid like they're dry-- I instinctively put a hand toward my tear duct, then both hands over both and kind of curl over if possible, because there's like a point I can't stop it. I have to instantly switch all emotions to anger or something to override, and that doesn't work, just think of random things to try and confuse my brain to stop the crying desire. It happens when I'm driving too. I mean I can totally force me to get to that state too, but when it happens it's like totally out of the blue.

Sorry it took me a minute to reply. I had to watch the video on a different computer because I can't get any videos to play on my phone. That was a really cool video! I liked it a lot! Thanks for posting it. I'm going to look for more of her videos.

Sometimes covers are just as good as the original... her version I think is up there with the original.

 

[Jean4]

Going to sound weird, but almost like I need to sneeze in my eyes, and they produce extra fluid like they're dry-- I instinctively put a hand toward my tear duct, then both hands over both and kind of curl over if possible, because there's like a point I can't stop it. I have to instantly switch all emotions to anger or something to override, and that doesn't work, just think of random things to try and confuse my brain to stop the crying desire. It happens when I'm driving too. I mean I can totally force me to get to that state too, but when it happens it's like totally out of the blue.

Right now I feel it coming on. But I know why. A certain individual has not been online all day. I like to know he is there. So my security blanket is missing and I feel it coming on. At least this time I know. Nothing I can do about it, but I know. And we all know who it is. ;)

 

[BlueWidow]

It is weird the crying. I wish we could figure out what triggers it. I could be sitting here typing you and it just hits me.

Yep.... me too.... I get a warning at least, so I can attempt to suppress it, or when I'm at work (seriously annoying), I just "have to go to the bathroom" I've started blaming meds for me needing to go more than normal, when really it's in case I can't stop--and then blame allergies.

I have the exact same problem!
One minute I'll be perfectly fine, then the next minute— I'm sobbing so hard I can hardly breathe. Sometimes I don't even know what triggers it. I occasionally get a warning, not that it ever does any good. Most of the time though it just hits me out of nowhere. It's really hard when you're around other people and they keep asking you what's wrong and they want you to stop crying and you just want to tell them all to go fuck off and leave you.

 

[Jean4]

I have the exact same problem!
One minute I'll be perfectly fine, then the next minute— I'm sobbing so hard I can hardly breathe. Sometimes I don't even know what triggers it. I occasionally get a warning, not that it ever does any good. Most of the time though it just hits me out of nowhere. It's really hard when you're around other people and they keep asking you what's wrong and they want you to stop crying and you just want to tell them all to go fuck off and leave you.

Which is when you say I have a cold. ;)

 

[Carina]

Like I teared up when I typed "Sometimes covers are just as good as the original..." like how is that even depressing to me?? That makes no sense. I sometimes just wonder if I"m non-stop supressing the urge, and eventually I just break with any emotional release.

 

[Jean4]

Like I teared up when I typed "Sometimes covers are just as good as the original..." like how is that even depressing to me?? That makes no sense. I sometimes just wonder if I"m non-stop supressing the urge, and eventually I just break with any emotional release.

Nah. I can tear up posting a funny meme. It just happens.

 

[BlueWidow]

Which is when you say I have a cold. ;)

Good idea. Yeah, I've told people before that I'm having an allergy attack and that's why my eyes are watering.

@Carina, I cry a lot when I'm driving too. That's also really bad, at least for me. It's another reason I don't like to drive.

 

[Carina]

Nah. I can tear up posting a funny meme. It just happens.

I tear up at memes, suicide memes all the time.

Good idea. Yeah, I've told people before that I'm having an allergy attack and that's why my eyes are watering.

@Carina, I cry a lot when I'm driving too. That's also really bad, at least for me. It's another reason I don't like to drive.

Yeah, and it's like potentially dangerous too. Nothing like driving on a country road with deer, if your eyes are cloudy with tears.

 

[Jean4]

Just listening

 

[BlueWidow]

Just listening

OK @Jean4, i'm going back to my other computer so I can listen to this song. I don't think I've ever heard it before.
I am definitely intrigued!

 

[Jean4]

OK @Jean4, i'm going back to my other computer so I can listen to this song. I don't think I've ever heard it before.
I am definitely intrigued!

Yup. Now you know where the name came from. ;)

 

[Carina]

How did I get so dehydrated? Granted I've thought this for like 2 hours, but haven't felt like getting up to get a drink.

 

[Jean4]

How did I get so dehydrated? Granted I've thought this for like 2 hours, but haven't felt like getting up to get a drink.

You got dehydrated because of all the alcohol you drank yesterday. Alcohol dehydrates you, and you didn't drink a minimum of 64 ounces of water today to prevent it. ;)

 

[BlueWidow]

How did I get so dehydrated? Granted I've thought this for like 2 hours, but haven't felt like getting up to get a drink.

You need a drink. . . . A non-alcoholic drink, that is. I think I'll be laying off the alcohol for tonight.

 

[Carina]

You got dehydrated because of all the alcohol you drank yesterday. Alcohol dehydrates you, and you didn't drink a minimum of 64 ounces of water today to prevent it. ;)

Yeah I drank like 24oz of water last night... only... 12oz today. I still haven't got up.

omg I don't want to get up ok... ok.... getting up.... must... get...up.

 

[Jean4]

Yeah I drank like 24oz of water last night... only... 12oz today. I still haven't got up.

omg I don't want to get up ok... ok.... getting up.... must... get...up.

Now you know why grasshopper!

 

[Squiddy]

Back. Looks like I can't rejoin the partial hospitalization program because no one can drive me and I don't have enough money to get my car back. I also talked with my mom and it didn't go too well. She asked me why I didn't act suicidal when I was at my friend's house and I explained to her that I was and she said at this point, she can't help me and how I need to "get my butt up and get a job" and maybe I would feel better.

 

[Jean4]

Back. Looks like I can't rejoin the partial hospitalization program because no one can drive me and I don't have enough money to get my car back. I also talked with my mom and it didn't go too well. She asked me why I didn't act suicidal when I was at my friend's house and I explained to her that I was and she said at this point, she can't help me and how I need to "get my butt up and get a job" and maybe I would feel better.

Some partial programs provide transportation. Do you have Medicaid or Medicare?
Is the program in a actual hospital?

 

[Carina]

I got water my body better be happy.

 

[Jean4]

I got water my body better be happy.

Your body will probably go into shock not knowing what it is

 

[Carina]

Your body will probably go into shock not knowing what it is

Well... wouldn't be the last time lol.

 

[Squiddy]

Some partial programs provide transportation. Do you have Medicaid or Medicare?
Is the program in a actual hospital?

I only have Anthem and it is in an actual hospital

 

[Carina]

I only have Anthem and it is in an actual hospital

Uber? Lift?

 

[Squiddy]

Uber? Lift?

Too expensive

 

[Carina]

Too expensive

Sorry :( Only option I could think of offhand without using your mom.

People in my town are using Uber to get the ER instead of Ambulances!

 

[Jean4]

Anthem Blue/Cross? Call the transportation office at the hospital and ask if they take it for transportation.
You can also ask the program itself if they provide transportation.
I know in New York (where I am) all programs provide transportation

 

[Squiddy]

Anthem Blue/Cross? Call the transportation office at the hospital and ask if they take it for transportation.
You can also ask the program itself if they provide transportation.

I guess I could try that :) I also need to figure out how I'm gonna pay the program because my co-pays are $25 and if it's $25 each time, I won't be able to afford it.

 

[Carina]

By any chance do they have some scaled payment for that? Not all do, but some places offer that.

 

[Jean4]

I guess I could try that :) I also need to figure out how I'm gonna pay the program because my co-pays are $25 and if it's $25 each time, I won't be able to afford it.

Again. Talk to the program about that. They may give you a lower price.

Again. Talk to the program about that. They may give you a lower price.

This really isn't hopeless. You just need to talk to the program.

 

[Squiddy]

Again. Talk to the program about that. They may give you a lower price.

This really isn't hopeless. You just need to talk to the program.

Alright. I just wish my mom would understand my thoughts