BlueWidow
Visionary
- Oct 6, 2019
- 2,179
The last I knew they had changed the formula and they now have 3 cal each instead of one and a half. They used to have it in the advertising that they were only one and a half calories each. Then they changed the formula sometime in the early 2000's. I'm not sure why they changed it, but the last I knew they still had 3 cal each.
Once you have an eating disorder it never goes away and since I can't lose weight no matter what I do, I just have to block all that stuff out because if I didn't I'd probably go swallow all of my SN right now because of how heavy I am.
To school? Denim top, denim colored pants, white shoesHave a great day! What are you wearing?
Yes, It's hard sometimes. When I moved to my current home in 2018, I had my elliptical trainer put in the bedroom. My thinking was once I recovered from the move and all the other stuff I'd been through, I would be able to start exercising and getting back into a routine. Then my thyroid started going down again and the doctors won't give me enough medicine to even keep me functional, so I sit here longingly looking at my elliptical wishing I could get on and exercise. I've gotten on it a few times but within five minutes I'm so dizzy that I have to get off of it or pass out. Starving without exercising for me is useless because I won't lose any weight, again due to my thyroid. The only way I lose weight is if I do extreme amounts of exercise and extreme amounts of starving. A so-called middle of the road "sensible diet", doesn't work for me because my metabolism is screwed up, partly from all the past eating disorder behavior, but mostly because my thyroid is messed up and it controls your metabolism and your energy level. So my thyroid makes it impossible for me to exercise or lose weight, but the doctors keep me on too low of a dose of medicine to allow me to exercise normally and then yell at me and blame every health problem I have on my weight.This may seem ridiculous to others (especially if they haven't dealt with an eating disorder) but I can understand how this change would freak you out. If a the recipe of once "safe food" changed in this way, even by a few calories, I would strike it off my list too. I don't eat TicTacs but I always thought that consumables under 5 calories l were listed as "0 calories" on the nutritional information label. This is good to know.
Realizing that AN-R will likely be a chronic condition that I will have to manage for the rest of my life is probably one of the bitterest pills that I've had to swallowalthough, I'd much rather be downing secobarbital pills lol. On paper I am doing a lot better and have been stuck in this amazing "partial remission" limbo for some years now. Still, I am left with the same thoughts and the only thing that has changed is that I am occupying a heavier (albeit underweight) body. Knowing that I can just punch my own bus ticket is the only thing that keeps me from a full blown relapse. I'm sorry that you seem to be feeling something similar.
I'm familiar with that mood.Yay you didn't get locked out @BlueWidow
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I am in a weird mood.... I"m torn between a number of t hings I want to do.... and really, none will be done out of any of them
No clue what that is offhand, but I saw it in the thread2m2b sounds extremely interesting.
Super strong alcohol.No clue what that is offhand, but I saw it in the thread
Why?oof, both the darknet/F threads on page one of SD juts got deleted. sigh.
Possibly because of mentioning specific places in a sense without using PMs would be my guessWhy?
Oh ok. Makes sensePossibly because of mentioning specific places in a sense without using PMs would be my guess
Oh ok. Makes sense
yeah, i guess so. We arent allowed to link directly to domains (which i understand) but onion links (there was only one mentioned - as far as i can tell) aren't even accessible by most people or crawlable.
One of the threads had no mention of where to go. Just some great basic info on a drug and how it interacts with a body, and the precautions one can take in trying to procure it (without mentioning where!).
Oh okI mean not saying they'd even say why... but you'd probably have to PM a mod and ask for the exact reason. But they may say they can't say, hard to tell. But if you really want to know for certain :)
I definitely need to burn that picture... and the notes... well the picture. I made a promise with that.
Don't know anything about that, but I am enjoying the cannabis thread you started. Particularly since I know almost next to nothing about it. It's funny because I've been around people who smoked it my whole life, But I've never smoked it or done it in any other form. I Know basically what it's supposed to do you and how it's supposed to make you feel, and I've heard long lists of ailments and health issues that it is supposed to relieve. Just don't know what the hell the US government is doing waiting so long to make it legal nationally.yeah, i guess so. We arent allowed to link directly to domains (which i understand) but onion links (there was only one mentioned - as far as i can tell) aren't even accessible by most people or crawlable.
One of the threads had no mention of where to go. Just some great basic info on a drug and how it interacts with a body, and the precautions one can take in trying to procure it (without mentioning where!).
Well the picture was more of a promise that no one would ever see it, it'd be over my dead body / I'd take it to the grave. As it's a printed copy (crappy copy--20 yrs old, from a scan of a poloroid because that's the way it was done then lol), but still... going to wait until I *know* just for a sentimental sake for now.Get rid of every memento, FFS!
Apparently it was used for discriminatory reasons over the years (as the govt always knew it was harmless), but since it grew, people used it, and it was harmless, it was easy to use to knock down groups the govt didn't like.... really screwed up crap honestly.Don't know anything about that, but I am enjoying the cannabis thread you started. Particularly since I know almost next to nothing about it. It's funny because I've been around people who smoked it my whole life, But I've never smoked it or done it in any other form. I Know basically what it's supposed to do you and how it's supposed to make you feel, and I've heard long lists of ailments and health issues that it is supposed to relieve. Just don't know what the hell the US government is doing waiting so long to make it legal nationally.
I suppose the mods have a fine line to walk between what content they allow on the site and keeping the site safe from those who would just love to have any excuse possible to shut it down. I understand your point though.I do not feel they are obligated to give me a response or anything of the sort, by the dictates of this forum and its general structure.
I am just pained that useful resources for serious people are being censored entirely, instead of trying to make them more accessible to folks without compromising the integrity of the site.
Yeah, that's why they were putting out films like Reefer Madness and trying to make people think it would make them go crazy and commit murder and suicide. Then people started actually using it and realized that was all a bunch of BS. Actually I don't trust the government's opinion on any drug anymore, or much of anything else for that matter. I think most of what they do is based on giving themselves power. It has nothing to do with protecting the people. . . . . more like controlling the people.Well the picture was more of a promise that no one would ever see it, it'd be over my dead body / I'd take it to the grave. As it's a printed copy (crappy copy--20 yrs old, from a scan of a poloroid because that's the way it was done then lol), but still... going to wait until I *know* just for a sentimental sake for now.
Apparently it was used for discriminatory reasons over the years (as the govt always knew it was harmless), but since it grew, people used it, and it was harmless, it was easy to use to knock down groups the govt didn't like.... really screwed up crap honestly.
I do not feel they are obligated to give me a response or anything of the sort, by the dictates of this forum and its general structure.
I am just pained that useful resources for serious people are being censored entirely, instead of trying to make them more accessible to folks without compromising the integrity of the site.
Well the picture was more of a promise that no one would ever see it, it'd be over my dead body / I'd take it to the grave. As it's a printed copy (crappy copy--20 yrs old, from a scan of a poloroid because that's the way it was done then lol), but still... going to wait until I *know* just for a sentimental sake for now.
I suppose the mods have a fine line to walk between what content they allow on the site and keeping the site safe from those who would just love to have any excuse possible to shut it down. I understand your point though.
Is there anyone on the site you could PM about it? I know absolutely nothing about the darknet and so forth.I understand. i got rid of everything but one photo of my ex, that i intend to look at right before i CTB.
I'm just in my feelings cause i'm having trouble securing a nitrogen tank, and the dark net might be my next best way to secure a way out. SN just doesn't appeal to me, and im not sure i'd have a good chance securing antiemetics, etc.
Is there anyone on the site you could PM about it? I know absolutely nothing about the darknet and so forth.