The burden of being a failure

[ForgottenTomb]

A reoccurring theme that I see on this forum is the theme of being a failure. I wonder, how much does the burden of living as a failure contribute to your desire to ctb?

For me, it does play a significant role, but it's not the main reason. Other factors make me want to ctb, but the weight of having to live as failure makes me feel like I have to ctb.

 

[LoiteringClouds]

Hello @ForgottenTomb,
I'm so sorry to hear you feel this way.
Do you feel like it's all doom and gloom?
If so, this world isn't a safe place to stay.

I attempted CTBing several times because of that.
I wanted to leave no matter what.
I did without any doubt.
All I need was a way out.

When you feel your life is irreparable,
I think, feeling like a loser is unbearable.
Though no exit plan has been laid out,
May you find a way out.

May your suffering cease
And you find peace


Now I'm in a relatively good situation, but it was sheer luck - not my effort - that had mercy on me.
I can't expect a miracle to happen on you, but I wish your situation improves somehow

 

[The anhedonic one]

Yes,
I would say that the burden of being a failure contributes to around 50% of my suicidal ideation.
The other 50% is a mixture of mental illness, and existential crisis, as well as worldly problems, lack of money etc.

 

[TimetoGo!]

Yes,
I would say that the burden of being a failure contributes to around 50% of my suicidal ideation.
The other 50% is a mixture of mental illness, and existential crisis, as well as worldly problems, lack of money etc.

This

 

[Sid19]

Not the main reason, but it does contribute to it overall. Being a failure, incompetent, socially awkward. Everything plays a role in it.

 

[Grav]

It's one of many reasons, probably a third.

 

[Forever Sleep]

It's weird. It probably used to be my main reason. I suppose it still is in a way. The consequences of failing financially in the creative job I want to do means I will need to get another wage slave job. That used to be the major factor pushing me towards CTB. Now though- I just don't seem to have the energy or desire for even the creative stuff. Of course- I'd likely still give it my best if an opportunity came up but deep down- my heart's gone out of everything- even succeeding in what I used to love to some degree.

 

[Praestat_Mori]

What's a failure? That's a question that may be different for everyone. I consider myself as a failure because I cannot recover from the last business fail that happened to me years ago. And this is going to kill me so this is my main reason to CTB.

 

[SexyIncél]

Pisses me off, our shit societies change the meanings of words. Let's look at the etymology of win:

"to desire, strive for"

So ironically, many who fail are also winners. It's just many social structures are rigged games that stamp FAIL on their heads. We've all seen dedicated people fail

It's all a joke. Like for example these pretend "job makers". Does anyone think there'll ever be enough wageslavery for everyone? Of course not — the moment there's zero unemployment, the drones won't fear getting fired. They'll just say "See ya mini-Trump" and grab the next job. And build power to change the rules

Even at the very top, everyone's so uncertain. Guys like Prince have to change their name into a symbol. Or Tucker Carlson makes $25 million/year, but has to wear a stupid sweater in that Andrew Tate interview, because his boss told him

I've known people at the very top of their profession. They still have to tiptoe around. I feel I have that drive to win, and do what it takes to make shit happen. Often in ways that try to help others out. (Because do I have anything better to do in this universe?) But I'm frustrated at all the structural stubbornness of people around me ("society"). Many seem smarter than me, they see the pointlessness & don't even try

The etymology of fail:

"to stumble"

There's always someone sticking out a foot, to make me stumble