Venting Talks about the future hurt

[EternallyCold]

I hate it when people talk about the future with me these days. Like when my mom talked about how I should save up money now so I can buy a house as soon as I'm 25, as if I'll love long enough to do that. It's miserable, talking about a future I wouldn't be in. Everybody's always asking about what school I'm thinking of going to, and I haven't thought about it either coz I'll be dead soon anyways. I can't believe I actually thought about a future before my exams, I was thinking of the things I would get to do after my exams and was even saving up for a new phone. I was so stupid. It's so sudden though, what went so wrong? I swear I was fine before, like yea I thought about killing myself sometimes but I never thought I'd actually do it. Now I have a plan and everything's ready. I can't believe it's all coming to an end soon. Hopefully I'll finally get some peace and I'll finally be able to escape from all this pain.

 

[fkyou]

Same

 

[camusfan_ig]

I feel ya man. It sucks. I understand they can't read our minds, so they don't know what's going on, but when it's so constant... Its upsetting. It makes you feel guilty. You're trying to hold yourself together if the day comes, but when ppl constantly remind you of your future, it just reminds you of what you're planning to do. And you're already thinking abt it enough as it is

 

[CandleShade]

Being reminded of a future you won't have is so goddamn cruel, yeah
Wish the best for you

 

[cocoo]

I feel you. Every time someone brings up an event happening next year that they're planning/hoping I'll be there for I'm at a loss for words.
And I relate to being hopeful for the future before exams. I started this semester so well and now I'm going to lose everything and no one in my life even knows...
I know no one likes to hear it, but you're not alone on this and I hope you find peace <3

 

[whosready4tmrw]

I hate it when people talk about the future with me these days. Like when my mom talked about how I should save up money now so I can buy a house as soon as I'm 25, as if I'll love long enough to do that. It's miserable, talking about a future I wouldn't be in. Everybody's always asking about what school I'm thinking of going to, and I haven't thought about it either coz I'll be dead soon anyways. I can't believe I actually thought about a future before my exams, I was thinking of the things I would get to do after my exams and was even saving up for a new phone. I was so stupid. It's so sudden though, what went so wrong? I swear I was fine before, like yea I thought about killing myself sometimes but I never thought I'd actually do it. Now I have a plan and everything's ready. I can't believe it's all coming to an end soon. Hopefully I'll finally get some peace and I'll finally be able to escape from all this pain.

I totally get that. The worst part is that you can't explain to someone why it's hurt you so much. People are so harsh when you don't want to plan or talk about the future and you can't just let them know that there isn't a future for you.

 

[RosebyAnyName]

I ended up pushing through with life and even achieving certain things, but it didn't make me feel better at all. Achievement did not change the past or the reason I wanted to die in the first place.