Suicide is selfish

[Soulless_Angel]

I have just spent the last hour listening to a neighbour who has stated a family member took their own life a few years back, she was very strong on how they were selfish and had no mind to others, and that what they did was so cruel and so forth,

When I tried to speak from my own side, I was silenced, her voice the only one that mattered, her informing me to think of others and the children, repeating, repeating,
I ended up taking my drink walking away from the situation, but my mind is fucked,
Right now im in the mind set I want to end it even more, and that's not even drink talking, it's a mindset that proves to me how selfish I am, simple as, no fucking shame!

Am I alone?

 

[Yomyom]

It's totally a selfish thing to do and I'm more than fine with it
Family will never understand the pain a suicidal person feel, in some point you just stop give a shit to what other people might think

 

[4eyebiped]

If someone, or something, is suffering you can choose to either selfishly tell it to stay and continue to suffer or selflessly let it go.

 

[Sprite_Geist]

It's also equally selfish to judge someone who has taken their life. They are hijacking a situation that isn't about them, and making it about themselves. "So you're suicidal and in a lot of pain... But let me tell you how that will affect ME."

Plus the word "selfish" is overused. It's mostly used negatively even though it's not always bad. The definition of selfishness is to do something that benefits yourself over others, so in other words: self-interest. The thing is we act on self-interest every day. Bought yourself a new phone? Self-interest. You could have spent that money on a charity. Want to have children to pass on your genes? Self-interest. You could have adopted. The list goes on. We commit selfish/self-interested actions all the time and yet we don't stigmatise each other for them, but somehow wanting to CTB gets special attention from people who like to throw the word "selfish" around.

People end their lives because they don't get any help, or the right help. So surely then isn't it those around a suicidal person who are selfish for not giving them the support that they need?

 

[RileyTanaka]

I agree with others here in saying that indeed it's selfish and it requires selfishness to carry out. Others want you to stay, suffer, and not bother them with your suffering so they can be comfortable. Think about the irony in that. By staying alive when your life is inexorably painful, they want you to choose their comfort over your own.

The way I see it, humans are - by their nature - selfish. We are nothing but creatures on this floating rock in space trying to extend our genes and then we die. In the interest of survival it is in our nature to prioritize our own needs first and foremost. The only "warped" part of it to others is that it's not in the interest of survival, but for our own demise. The most important dimension they're missing is the suffering we experience.

As an aside, I actually met one person who is not suffering with mental health issues, never has, and supports people ending their pain if necessary - more pointedly, on their own terms. She is a cancer survivor, however, so I think it takes some kind of understanding of suffering for people to begin thinking critically on the issue.

 

[TheGoodGuy]

No one asked to be born so everyone has the right to die, forcing someone to live in a world they never were able to consent to is selfish.

 

[Jumper Geo]

People are narrow minded they just say things like that so they don't have to think and deal with the root cause of why that person ctb, sorry you feel lost and want to ctb I know it's tough you could write in your suicide letter, you ctb because you spoke to your neighbour and she depressed you, lol, it will stop her gossiping.

Take care, drink more rum to cheer yourself up.

Cheers

Geo

 

[Green Destiny]

I counter that argument with the simple fact that isn't it selfish in itself to force someone who is suffering to live out their days in perpetual misery?

 

[pete_x]

In the end, does it matter ?

 

[Blue Portal]

I have just spent the last hour listening to a neighbour who has stated a family member took their own life a few years back, she was very strong on how they were selfish and had no mind to others, and that what they did was so cruel and so forth,

When I tried to speak from my own side, I was silenced, her voice the only one that mattered, her informing me to think of others and the children, repeating, repeating,
I ended up taking my drink walking away from the situation, but my mind is fucked,
Right now im in the mind set I want to end it even more, and that's not even drink talking, it's a mindset that proves to me how selfish I am, simple as, no fucking shame!

Am I alone?

There's no one size fits all for this. I think some suicides are selfish but most are not. It also depends on if they honestly tried to reach out for help.

 

[_Minsk]

i wouldnt even call anyone family if they would blame and shame me for being done, without trying to spend even a minute to comprehend how someone must feel who plans ctb

 

[ssaaahmo]

i don't think it's 100% possible to empathize with a suicidal person because you never know what goes on in their mind or what drove them to that decision

 

[Close_to_freedom]

It's totally a selfish thing to do and I'm more than fine with it
Family will never understand the pain a suicidal person feel, in some point you just stop give a shit to what other people might think

Amen

In the end, does it matter ?

That's important to keep in mind. Mentally fast forward a hundred years and everyone you know is dead anyway. The 'how' doesn't matter.

 

[Soulless_Angel]

Amen

That's important to keep in mind. Mentally fast forward a hundred years and everyone you know is dead anyway. The 'how' doesn't matter.

I read after 4 generations, you are forgotten anyway.

I was so drunk last night, a lot is a blur, but i cant get her almost annoyance at the fact someone she knew had hung themselves out of my mind.

Apparently if you have a family, you HAVE to keep going and get better. Damn if it was only that simple.

 

[Close_to_freedom]

I read after 4 generations, you are forgotten anyway.

I was so drunk last night, a lot is a blur, but i cant get her almost annoyance at the fact someone she knew had hung themselves out of my mind.

Apparently if you have a family, you HAVE to keep going and get better. Damn if it was only that simple.

I hate that they assume there's a better.

 

[I screwed up]

Only if others knew the pain u r in .... Even then if they feel u r selfish then its clear who is really selfish ...

 

[ohhgeeitsme]

If someone doesn't understand suicide, that just means they've never experienced utter hopelessness. People can live rather horrible lives, deal with pain and still not understand suicide because they still never got the point of true hopelessness and agony. For someone to understand it without going through it themselves are usually very intelligent, perceptive and capable of objective insight. There aren't a whole lot of people like that on Earth, unfortunately.

 

[mathieu]

I think it is selfish that I plan to CTB but that it is also selfish that my family want me not to do it.

 

[FriendofDeath]

There's no one size fits all for this. I think some suicides are selfish but most are not. It also depends on if they honestly tried to reach out for help.

When I was young and felt suicidal, I decided I didn't want to put my parents through that, so I stayed. In my early 20s I was in a doctor's office where a man shot his doctor and then himself. I was very angry that he changed everyone's lives that day by pulling that trigger. Could not believe his selfishness. Then I lost my young son. I've been mad at him at least once, but most often I am overwhelmed by the loss. I came to realize many who suicide are in extreme pain - mental, physical or both. And as much as I'd like to save everyone so no one has to experience loss to suicide, I realize it is an individual's choice. This is why I can consider it now even though I know the damage I might do to family members. I have no immediate plans, but I think about it often.

 

[Meowkin]

I have just spent the last hour listening to a neighbour who has stated a family member took their own life a few years back, she was very strong on how they were selfish and had no mind to others, and that what they did was so cruel and so forth,

When I tried to speak from my own side, I was silenced, her voice the only one that mattered, her informing me to think of others and the children, repeating, repeating,
I ended up taking my drink walking away from the situation, but my mind is fucked,
Right now im in the mind set I want to end it even more, and that's not even drink talking, it's a mindset that proves to me how selfish I am, simple as, no fucking shame!

Am I alone?

It sounds like you had a very unpleasant interaction with your neighbour which made you agitated. It's not pleasant when someone shoves their opinion on you. I'm sorry you had to endure that.

 

[ceelo]

I have just spent the last hour listening to a neighbour who has stated a family member took their own life a few years back, she was very strong on how they were selfish and had no mind to others, and that what they did was so cruel and so forth,

When I tried to speak from my own side, I was silenced, her voice the only one that mattered, her informing me to think of others and the children, repeating, repeating,
I ended up taking my drink walking away from the situation, but my mind is fucked,
Right now im in the mind set I want to end it even more, and that's not even drink talking, it's a mindset that proves to me how selfish I am, simple as, no fucking shame!

Am I alone?

real selfishness is expecting someone to live in agony just so you get your wants... theres actually also a genetic element to suicide so...

 

[Nem]

Imagine you come from a poor family and somehow you become successful in business and you become very wealthy...would that be selfish since the rest of the family is poor? That neighbors opinion is just that and it is very closed minded, they have no idea what you are actually feeling like and staying alive so that others don't feel sad is selfish itself. Hope things get better for you
Peace/hugs

 

[Deleted member 17331]

The first thing I thought about was this meme:

 

[Bruces]

The way I see it is that suicide maybe a selfish act as it obviously hurts other people but that doesn't necessarily mean that PERSON is selfish as to them they might not see any alternative.

 

[yellow_boat]

Life is a thousand times more selfish than suicide.

 

[neveraskedforthis]

I am so fucking tired of hearing the word 'selfish'. Literally everything you do is ultimately out of own interest, altruism doesn't exist. Ill be happy to leave this hellhole and i think me never having kids compensates for commiting suicide.

 

[rhiino]

Ill be happy to leave this hellhole and i think me never having kids compensates for commiting suicide.

No need to compensate anything there, mate.
If anything, it is selfish to get kids. You cannot ask them whether they want to live, they might feel like shit one day, wanting to ctb like most people here do. Where I live every fourth gets mentally ill until 25. Pretty bad prospects. Let alone the fact that the planet is massively overpopulated already. So the rest of the world, breeding like crazy, should not tell me about being selfish because I want to end my own fucking life.

 

[Soulless_Angel]

No need to compensate anything there, mate.
If anything, it is selfish to get kids. You cannot ask them whether they want to live, they might feel like shit one day, wanting to ctb like most people here do. Where I live every fourth gets mentally ill until 25. Pretty bad prospects. Let alone the fact that the planet is massively overpopulated already. So the rest of the world, breeding like crazy, should not tell me about being selfish because I want to end my own fucking life.

I ask the children situation is not brought up on this thread, there are plenty of other threadsfor that, I am a parent, so back off with this shit!

 

[Livinginhell]

Who's more selfish, me committing suicide as living every day is suffering. Upsetting the few who care for a while. Or me to continue to suffer every day to spare them the loss , yet upset and worry them everyday.

 

[Soulless_Angel]

Who's more selfish, me committing suicide as living every day is suffering. Upsetting the few who care for a while. Or me to continue to suffer every day to spare them the loss , yet upset and worry them everyday.

people are forgotten so easily, so how is it selfish? A lady I know CTB Back in December, No mentions her now, her husband has a new girlfriend, everyone has moved on.
We sit and suffer for life or they sit and suffer for a few months before getting on withs hit