willitpass
Don’t try to offer me help, I’ve tried everything
- Mar 10, 2020
- 2,061
willitpass
Don’t try to offer me help, I’ve tried everything
- Mar 10, 2020
- 2,061
No fever right now, but I feel like I have a horrible cold. Very sore throat, stuffed nose, watering eyes, chills, body aches. It all just hit at once within a matter of an hour.
willitpass
Don’t try to offer me help, I’ve tried everything
- Mar 10, 2020
- 2,061
Woke up with an even worse sore throat. Feels like I've got a head cold. But I'm also incredible dizzy. I nearly fell over when I stood up because the whole world was spinning. Not sure if this is related to the cut or not. It's possible I've just picked up a regular cold, but maybe if I have it will lower my immune system even more to allow a serious infection to take over.
null_blank
just passing through
- Aug 14, 2024
- 43
willitpass
Don’t try to offer me help, I’ve tried everything
- Mar 10, 2020
- 2,061
Bit TMI but what about this whole thread isn't, just went to the bathroom and the suspected GI bleed from the pain killers has absolutely worsened. It was questionable at first, then seemed to completely clear up, and now it is textbook upper GI bleed stool. That's good news. I feel all stuffy and puffy in the face from this cold or whatever it is. Very thirsty but trying to avoid fluids at all costs.
Crazy to think that god forbid I survive this how much damage I'm doing to myself. My biggest consolation when I do stupid shit like this is that I am definitely taking years off of my life if it doesn't kill me sooner rather than later. God please don't let it be later.
Crazy to think that god forbid I survive this how much damage I'm doing to myself. My biggest consolation when I do stupid shit like this is that I am definitely taking years off of my life if it doesn't kill me sooner rather than later. God please don't let it be later.
They say that desperation is the mother of invention... I hope your unique solution gives you the peace you seek. A family member died of a GI bleed (ironically while in hospital for something else but all they could do was make him comfortable) it took less than a day. Too many NSAIDs. Wishing you the best of luck!
willitpass
Don’t try to offer me help, I’ve tried everything
- Mar 10, 2020
- 2,061
I feel like my brain is trying to run through syrup. I keep getting confused or reading things wrong or forgetting basic words.
willitpass
Don’t try to offer me help, I’ve tried everything
- Mar 10, 2020
- 2,061
My back is in extreme pain. I hardly pee anymore. I'm so thirsty but I'm terrified to consume liquids. The most I'll allow myself to have fluid wise is fruit. Lord kill me please.
stilhavinightmares
Warlock
- Oct 13, 2022
- 717
My heart is broken for you and your increasing suffering. I hope for your sake that it will end soon. So much love to you.
mistymoo
Im going to be apart of the 27 club
- May 30, 2024
- 107
How do you feel about other folks attempting and documenting this? I think I really want to try this
willitpass
Don’t try to offer me help, I’ve tried everything
- Mar 10, 2020
- 2,061
No you don't. This is an incredibly slow and painful process that takes an already impaired immune system, a ridiculously high pain tolerance, and an insane amount of patience. Even then the odds are stacked against you. Especially if you are not immunocompromised, trying this is just about useless. I'm half a month in and I just now started having symptoms and I'm not even sure yet that they're even signs of something lethal. The only reason I'm sticking it out is because I'm a severe self harmer willing to do war crime level torture to myself. Do not try this.
mistymoo
Im going to be apart of the 27 club
- May 30, 2024
- 107
I'm very very used to being sick and in pain. I've been a severe self harder for years. I'm the epitome of a masochist. I fell asleep during a 5hr self harm cover up tattoo because i barely felt it.
This kind of pain would be familiar and welcomed. However I'm not immunocompromised. The pain isn't my issue here. I just want to know if you'd be comfortable with someone else using this as a backup plan if all else falls through?
willitpass
Don’t try to offer me help, I’ve tried everything
- Mar 10, 2020
- 2,061
This is not anything like cutting or tattoos. This is deep aches in the bones. Severe nausea that seems to last hours and hours. It isn't stinging on the skin (obviously the cutting part is, but the susbsequent feelings).
The human body, especially when generally healthy at baseline, is incredibly resilient. There are so many protective mechanisms to keep you alive and well. If your immune system is properly functioning, you will not achieve anything from doing this other than a nasty cut with a possibly localized infection (meaning it doesn't spread, it stays where it's at. Then your body is likely able to fight it off before it moves into the blood) and some irritated skin from the abrasive substances you're putting in contact with the nearby skin. There really is no point to doing it if you are healthy.
And even if you arent healthy, I would never recommend this. The pain, of course, is horrific. The confusion I'm starting to experience is very disorienting. When I was septic last time I couldn't stomach anything for days, I couldn't sleep, I couldn't get comfortable. It was awful. And the risks if you survive are not worth it. Limb loss, permanent organ damage, tissue necrosis, stroke, brain damage, the list goes on and on. I would never recommend anyone attempt this.
willitpass
Don’t try to offer me help, I’ve tried everything
- Mar 10, 2020
- 2,061
Lost over a pound in water weight overnight from the dehydration. I've been restricting pretty heavily in food again too. My lips are practically white. I'm so dizzy. Still getting confused at random things and reading things wrong. The heart burn isn't too bad so I'll up the game on the pain meds today. I am willing to do anything. I don't know why my mind is okay with this but shuts down when I start thinking about rigging up a rope and hanging from a tree.
Out of nowhere there is a nasty fishy smell coming from the dressing. I double dress it for that exact reason and it always keeps the smell contained. I can see a lot of new drainage saturating it too. I haven't taken it off to see but I don't know what that means.
Out of nowhere there is a nasty fishy smell coming from the dressing. I double dress it for that exact reason and it always keeps the smell contained. I can see a lot of new drainage saturating it too. I haven't taken it off to see but I don't know what that means.
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willitpass
Don’t try to offer me help, I’ve tried everything
- Mar 10, 2020
- 2,061
Just triple dressed it as I have placed to be today and can't be smelling like your local polluted river full of dying fish.
Ash
What dreams may come?
- Oct 4, 2021
- 1,648
stilhavinightmares
Warlock
- Oct 13, 2022
- 717
You're not afraid of someone being concerned about how you look? Or having a medical emergency and someone calling for help?
willitpass
Don’t try to offer me help, I’ve tried everything
- Mar 10, 2020
- 2,061
I am, but unfortunately I've been making excuses to avoid things for over a week now. People will be more concerned if I completely avoid everything and everyone for too long, considering my history. I'm used to extreme self harm and feeling like shit, so I feel confident that I can fake my way through well enough to avoid suspicion. One bowl of fruit was enough to pink my lips back up enough to not look dead, I'm dizzy every day of my life so I know how far I can push myself before I need to sit down, I'm a bit confused but I'm still coherent. It's a balancing act of sorts.
I am petrified of passing out or something and someone calling for help because there simply is no way to explain this away. They will most likely assume munchausen and I could only convince them otherwise by telling the truth. And telling the truth is obviously not going to land me anywhere but the looney bin. I truly have to find the perfect balance of seeing people enough to not arise suspicion and not seeing people too much that something happens when others are around.
willitpass
Don’t try to offer me help, I’ve tried everything
- Mar 10, 2020
- 2,061
I'm so dizzy. I feel like I'm floating through water. And everything looks like tunnel vision. Noises sound so far away. It's like very heavy disassociation. I'm really purple and mottled but that's not uncommon for me due to medical conditions so it's impossible to say if that's my baseline or an indicative presentation. I feel so cold. Pale/purple and super dry lips but my sats are normal. Only slightly tachycardic. In a decent amount of pain, especially on my back, not terrible, I'd say 4/10. I've been on and off sweaty all day. Id like to go to sleep though. The cut hurts a lot. I still haven't changed the dressing to see what's up. No fevers today.
willitpass
Don’t try to offer me help, I’ve tried everything
- Mar 10, 2020
- 2,061
Nowhere to be the next few days so tonight I'm going to go overboard with the pain killers.
