Wanted to make a post to see how many others engage with "normal" social media (Instagram, X/Twitter, Facebook, Discord, etc.)
How do you think using it is influencing your decision to ctb in either direction if at all? Does it help control your emotions better? Gives you more of a drive to ctb?
Honestly, I have dissected a good amount of my ego and have learned to love myself unconditionally, so I don't find myself so bothered by people doing better than me. I know that with my childhood, I am doing the best I can. The people who are more successful than me simply had a better life. I won't avoid accountability. I won't stop working hard. I will work 10x harder to catch up with them. But I acknowledge I have done my best and focus on working on myself from where I am, not comparing myself to others.
I personally think I am a 10 even though I know others would not agree because I can acknowledge I have my own opinion of myself and others have their own opinion about me. But I choose to accept myself as I am.
Here is my logic. Other people outside my family HAVE to conditionally love me. If I treat them like garbage, aren't in their league looks-wise, or are way dumber than them to the point they don't like it, then they will not want to interact with me. If I do not provide some sort of value to them, they will stop talking to me. Other people will NOT accept me "as I am." Thus, self improvement is crucial for being in the world with others who will conditionally like you. But there is no reason why I should dislike myself. Others can dislike me because I provide no value to them. But I provide a ton of value to myself. I have limbs. I can help myself eat with my hands. My legs help me walk. My brain allows me to absorb abstract concepts. I mean there are so many ways that we are valuable to ourselves, so we can always give ourselves love.
However, there is literally no reason why we have to conditionally love ourselves. We provide the most value to ourselves if we love ourselves. Love is what we desire from others. Why don't we give that to ourselves? If you haven't done this, you will feel extremely uncomfortable. But if you practice it, it will make you feel a lot better.
Social media is fine as long as you acknowledge that it simply is not real. Let me give you an analogy.
I tell you a story about a boyfriend and a girlfriend. I tell you, "His girlfriend is so abusive. Look at this video of her hitting him. He's a victim." This information can absolutely be accurate. However, what if I told you that before the girlfriend abused her boyfriend, her boyfriend would beat her all the time, tried to ruin her reputation in her job by lying about her and almost got her fired, cheated on her 5 times while she was pregnant with their baby, and kicked her out of the house every time he got pissed at her. All of a sudden, the story completely changes.
With social media, you see all of the highlights of someone's life. You see it all sugarcoated. All the famous influencers have filters on their faces and bodies so that they can compete with the other models on the app. They all paint all the good parts of their lives. But if you knew all the bad stuff happening behind closed doors, you'd be surprised. Most people are abused in this life and have massive egos, so the types of people who run huge social media accounts TEND to be narcissistic. And some may be very low in psychopathy (I have bottom 1% psychopathy despite being a narcissist, so I am essentially harmless), but most tend to not be low just based on the natural distribution of psychopathy. So you have no idea how bad they are behind those closed doors.
For these reasons, I do not care about social media. I do take it as inspiration for my own life. I transform my occasional jealousy into something positive as it allows me to understand what I secretly want. But I never assume their life is great. I just acknowledge the good pictures and achievements are good pieces of their lives, but I don't make a conclusion or generalization about their lives being perfect based on it. I just acknowledge that they have good parts.
