Method SN in 2 weeks - testing out meds

[toofargone6969]

I'm completing the final touches on my SN plan that I hope to use for real on October 2nd. I've been spending the past couple weeks tying up loose ends, the hardest of which was saying goodbye to my best friend of 16 years, my beloved dog that I had to put down due to liver cancer. It was excruciatingly painful to watch my soulmate pass away but so peaceful for her as they injected her with nembutal, the good stuff. I miss my baby so much and wish I could go the way she did.

But this is all I've got. I've had the SN since April from a source that's no longer available -CCS. My plan is roughly as follows...
12-14 hour fast (the last thing I want in my mouth is chocolate lol or chocolate and ice cream)
Naproxen or ibuprofen taken several times throughout the day (not sure on the timing or if I'll even include it)
Start liquid fast 3 hours before SN
20-30mg domperidone 1 hour before SN
40-80 mg propranolol 1 hour before SN
10mg lorazepam 45 minutes before

I'm not 100% certain on the timing of prop and benzos yet. I've been experimenting this week to get a feel for the meds.

I tried 10mg domperidone last week after waking up so around 15 hours of fasting - no side effects at all. Will test 20mg on Tuesday also on an empty stomach and long fast.

I tried just 20mg propranolol a few days ago and it reduced my resting heart rate from 90bpm to 72 and then 64 over the course of a couple hours. I'll try 40mg next to see if it works faster and what it does to my resting heart rate. I did feel more calm.

I've left a day or two between med tests to allow for a full understanding of each drug. I already take a small 1mg dose of lorazepam nightly for many months now but tonight I went for 6mg to see how sleepy I get, when, etc. Luckily I have access to enough lorazepam (tablets and liquid) to use as much as I need for the SN plan. I was thinking 10mg but I'm not sure yet since I have a small tolerance after months of my nightly 1mg dose

I may have to try another large benzo dose combined with propranolol to see what that's like. As well as confirming my body can handle the full dose of antiemetics with no side effects. I will keep this thread updated with my findings and my final plan. Hopefully it can be of some use to members here and encourage others to test their medications beforehand to make sure they agree with your body and you wont have any unexpected side effects.

I'm very scared to go through with this but it's my only way out (I don't want to hang) so I'm planning it as carefully as I can and as comfortable I can allow myself to be while ingesting literal poison.

Any critique to my plan is welcomed and I'm open to discussion about the elements of my plan. I hope we can all achieve inner peace. I feel so numb and just want it all to be over. Having to plan this out makes it so painful.
The 6mg lorazapema is hitting me hard and typing is becoming difficult
that's a good sign
I feel like I'm smothered by a gravity blanket.
It's been over a hour so even liquid dosing take a while to kick in as its bee over an hour.

 

[PracheenKaal_00!]

I'm completing the final touches on my SN plan that I hope to use for real on October 2nd. I've been spending the past couple weeks tying up loose ends, the hardest of which was saying goodbye to my best friend of 16 years, my beloved dog that I had to put down due to liver cancer. It was excruciatingly painful to watch my soulmate pass away but so peaceful for her as they injected her with nembutal, the good stuff. I miss my baby so much and wish I could go the way she did.

But this is all I've got. I've had the SN since April from a source that's no longer available -CCS. My plan is roughly as follows...
12-14 hour fast (the last thing I want in my mouth is chocolate lol or chocolate and ice cream)
Naproxen or ibuprofen taken several times throughout the day (not sure on the timing or if I'll even include it)
Start liquid fast 3 hours before SN
20-30mg domperidone 1 hour before SN
40-80 mg propranolol 1 hour before SN
10mg lorazepam 45 minutes before

I'm not 100% certain on the timing of prop and benzos yet. I've been experimenting this week to get a feel for the meds.

I tried 10mg domperidone last week after waking up so around 15 hours of fasting - no side effects at all. Will test 20mg on Tuesday also on an empty stomach and long fast.

I tried just 20mg propranolol a few days ago and it reduced my resting heart rate from 90bpm to 72 and then 64 over the course of a couple hours. I'll try 40mg next to see if it works faster and what it does to my resting heart rate. I did feel more calm.

I've left a day or two between med tests to allow for a full understanding of each drug. I already take a small 1mg dose of lorazepam nightly for many months now but tonight I went for 6mg to see how sleepy I get, when, etc. Luckily I have access to enough lorazepam (tablets and liquid) to use as much as I need for the SN plan. I was thinking 10mg but I'm not sure yet since I have a small tolerance after months of my nightly 1mg dose

I may have to try another large benzo dose combined with propranolol to see what that's like. As well as confirming my body can handle the full dose of antiemetics with no side effects. I will keep this thread updated with my findings and my final plan. Hopefully it can be of some use to members here and encourage others to test their medications beforehand to make sure they agree with your body and you wont have any unexpected side effects.

I'm very scared to go through with this but it's my only way out (I don't want to hang) so I'm planning it as carefully as I can and as comfortable I can allow myself to be while ingesting literal poison.

Any critique to my plan is welcomed and I'm open to discussion about the elements of my plan. I hope we can all achieve inner peace. I feel so numb and just want it all to be over. Having to plan this out makes it so painful.
The 6mg lorazapema is hitting me hard and typing is becoming difficult
that's a good sign
I feel like I'm smothered by a gravity blanket.
It's been over a hour so even liquid dosing take a while to kick in as its bee over an hour.

I'm sorry it had to come to this
I wish you the best with your plans.
I hope you are able to find your freedom and peace successfully.

 

[thebookofdisquiet.]

Domperidone is a lot safer than Meto when it comes to side effects so I wouldn't worry about it.

I took 80mg of Propranolol last week and my heartbeat went from 47bpm to 45 so it didn't do much for me, maybe because I have bradycardia? Glad that it worked for you though, I think I'll have to take a lot more.

I'd say don't skip the ibuprofen, the recommended is 600mg and any chance to reduce discomfort is important!

I think the medicine and their timing are ok, good luck! I'll follow this thread until it's my time to go later this week.

 

[Unknown21]

I have both of metoclopramide and domperidone what would you advise me to use?

 

[sanshi]

Not far from my appointment

 

[toofargone6969]

I have both of metoclopramide and domperidone what would you advise me to use?

It's up to you. Maybe try a test dose of 10mg of each on different days. I chose domp because it accomplishes the same thing without crossing the blood brain barrier as much as meto which increases risk for nasty side effects. Domperidone works on same receptors but in a safer way and still speeds up gastric emptying. Just felt like the right choice for me. I think both are completely fine but you must do a test dose before your regimen to ensure theres no unexpected side effects. I had none with 10mg domp and will try 20mg domp tomorrow or Thursday.

 

[release_me]

I'm completing the final touches on my SN plan that I hope to use for real on October 2nd. I've been spending the past couple weeks tying up loose ends, the hardest of which was saying goodbye to my best friend of 16 years, my beloved dog that I had to put down due to liver cancer. It was excruciatingly painful to watch my soulmate pass away but so peaceful for her as they injected her with nembutal, the good stuff. I miss my baby so much and wish I could go the way she did.

But this is all I've got. I've had the SN since April from a source that's no longer available -CCS. My plan is roughly as follows...
12-14 hour fast (the last thing I want in my mouth is chocolate lol or chocolate and ice cream)
Naproxen or ibuprofen taken several times throughout the day (not sure on the timing or if I'll even include it)
Start liquid fast 3 hours before SN
20-30mg domperidone 1 hour before SN
40-80 mg propranolol 1 hour before SN
10mg lorazepam 45 minutes before

I'm not 100% certain on the timing of prop and benzos yet. I've been experimenting this week to get a feel for the meds.

I tried 10mg domperidone last week after waking up so around 15 hours of fasting - no side effects at all. Will test 20mg on Tuesday also on an empty stomach and long fast.

I tried just 20mg propranolol a few days ago and it reduced my resting heart rate from 90bpm to 72 and then 64 over the course of a couple hours. I'll try 40mg next to see if it works faster and what it does to my resting heart rate. I did feel more calm.

I've left a day or two between med tests to allow for a full understanding of each drug. I already take a small 1mg dose of lorazepam nightly for many months now but tonight I went for 6mg to see how sleepy I get, when, etc. Luckily I have access to enough lorazepam (tablets and liquid) to use as much as I need for the SN plan. I was thinking 10mg but I'm not sure yet since I have a small tolerance after months of my nightly 1mg dose

I may have to try another large benzo dose combined with propranolol to see what that's like. As well as confirming my body can handle the full dose of antiemetics with no side effects. I will keep this thread updated with my findings and my final plan. Hopefully it can be of some use to members here and encourage others to test their medications beforehand to make sure they agree with your body and you wont have any unexpected side effects.

I'm very scared to go through with this but it's my only way out (I don't want to hang) so I'm planning it as carefully as I can and as comfortable I can allow myself to be while ingesting literal poison.

Any critique to my plan is welcomed and I'm open to discussion about the elements of my plan. I hope we can all achieve inner peace. I feel so numb and just want it all to be over. Having to plan this out makes it so painful.
The 6mg lorazapema is hitting me hard and typing is becoming difficult
that's a good sign
I feel like I'm smothered by a gravity blanket.
It's been over a hour so even liquid dosing take a while to kick in as its bee over an hour.

That's a well researched and thought out plan my friend! Respect ! What's your SN dosage and route of administration? Care to reveal, please?

 

[toofargone6969]

That's a well researched and thought out plan my friend! Respect ! What's your SN dosage and route of administration? Care to reveal, please?

Thank you. I've been researching since I came here in April.
My SN dose will be 20 grams in 50ml water (I'm barely weigh 105 pounds so don't want to take too much, even 20 is probably too much)
My backup glass will have 15 to 20 grams SN in 50mL water or less if it mixes well.
Route of administration will be drinking it through a straw, quickly. Not sipping or wasting my time tasting it. I'm gonna chug it with a straw then lay on my right side with the backup glass on the nightstand within reach. I'll have a bag for vomit and my phone with me to update my official goodbye thread. Nobody will find me until around 10 hours later so that should be plenty of time.

 

[release_me]

Thank you. I've been researching since I came here in April.
My SN dose will be 20 grams in 50ml water (I'm barely weigh 105 pounds so don't want to take too much, even 20 is probably too much)
My backup glass will have 15 to 20 grams SN in 50mL water or less if it mixes well.
Route of administration will be drinking it through a straw, quickly. Not sipping or wasting my time tasting it. I'm gonna chug it with a straw then lay on my right side with the backup glass on the nightstand within reach. I'll have a bag for vomit and my phone with me to update my official goodbye thread. Nobody will find me until around 10 hours later so that should be plenty of time.

Wow ! You really are set ! Such clarity and vision.... amazing ! Thank you for sharing
Mind if I ask what brought you to this ?

 

[Huggs]

You could try fasting for that time to see if it makes you nauseous, though domperidone will probably make that a non-issue. I'm not sure about the differences between the stat dose of antiemetics versus the regime, taking the stat dose should be alright. This looks like a solid plan to me, it's especially good that you're testing the medication.

 

[Unknown21]

It's up to you. Maybe try a test dose of 10mg of each on different days. I chose domp because it accomplishes the same thing without crossing the blood brain barrier as much as meto which increases risk for nasty side effects. Domperidone works on same receptors but in a safer way and still speeds up gastric emptying. Just felt like the right choice for me. I think both are completely fine but you must do a test dose before your regimen to ensure theres no unexpected side effects. I had none with 10mg domp and will try 20mg domp tomorrow or Thursday.

Thanks for response, good luck with your plans.

 

[toofargone6969]

Wow ! You really are set ! Such clarity and vision.... amazing ! Thank you for sharing
Mind if I ask what brought you to this ?

Thanks. May as well get this right since it's the last thing I'll ever do, and I've fucked up my entire life.

My physical health started to deteriorate last December after a sudden back injury and I also stopped sleeping. I already had long standing depression and anxiety but I was functional. Now I'm a shell of who I once was. I used to be a beautiful, driven, and passionate person with goals and dreams for the future. I'm too afraid to leave the house, half my hair has fallen out, and I look disgusting from 9 months of barely sleeping and constant anxiety attacks. I used to have beautiful thick curly hair and perfect clear skin, and a nice body. That's all gone now and theres no getting it back. My entire personality has also gone. I used to have so many passions and interests but now I can barely even watch TV and eat. My dark thoughts, paranoia, and health anxiety and health issues have completely taken hold of me. I've been to a dozen doctors and none have helped me. Tried many many meds, ketamine therapy, TMS, therapy... none of it helped me. The only thing that can save me is a time machine. I dont want this body or this mind, so I will eliminate them.

 

[release_me]

Ok now that is some real shit you've been through and going through! Im so sorry.
Well you still are driven, passionate and focussed... looking at your ctb plan so meticulously worked out, I can say this. But only you know what demons you're fighting and only i know what am fighting.

 

[toofargone6969]

Ok now that is some real shit you've been through and going through! Im so sorry.
Well you still are driven, passionate and focussed... looking at your ctb plan so meticulously worked out, I can say this. But only you know what demons you're fighting and only i know what am fighting.

Thanks. I'm sorry you are here too. I hope we both find the peace we deserve

 

[release_me]

Thanks. I'm sorry you are here too. I hope we both find the peace we deserve

Thanks my friend... the world is not worthy of us....

 

[fightingforchoice]

I'm completing the final touches on my SN plan that I hope to use for real on October 2nd. I've been spending the past couple weeks tying up loose ends, the hardest of which was saying goodbye to my best friend of 16 years, my beloved dog that I had to put down due to liver cancer. It was excruciatingly painful to watch my soulmate pass away but so peaceful for her as they injected her with nembutal, the good stuff. I miss my baby so much and wish I could go the way she did.

But this is all I've got. I've had the SN since April from a source that's no longer available -CCS. My plan is roughly as follows...
12-14 hour fast (the last thing I want in my mouth is chocolate lol or chocolate and ice cream)
Naproxen or ibuprofen taken several times throughout the day (not sure on the timing or if I'll even include it)
Start liquid fast 3 hours before SN
20-30mg domperidone 1 hour before SN
40-80 mg propranolol 1 hour before SN
10mg lorazepam 45 minutes before

I'm not 100% certain on the timing of prop and benzos yet. I've been experimenting this week to get a feel for the meds.

I tried 10mg domperidone last week after waking up so around 15 hours of fasting - no side effects at all. Will test 20mg on Tuesday also on an empty stomach and long fast.

I tried just 20mg propranolol a few days ago and it reduced my resting heart rate from 90bpm to 72 and then 64 over the course of a couple hours. I'll try 40mg next to see if it works faster and what it does to my resting heart rate. I did feel more calm.

I've left a day or two between med tests to allow for a full understanding of each drug. I already take a small 1mg dose of lorazepam nightly for many months now but tonight I went for 6mg to see how sleepy I get, when, etc. Luckily I have access to enough lorazepam (tablets and liquid) to use as much as I need for the SN plan. I was thinking 10mg but I'm not sure yet since I have a small tolerance after months of my nightly 1mg dose

I may have to try another large benzo dose combined with propranolol to see what that's like. As well as confirming my body can handle the full dose of antiemetics with no side effects. I will keep this thread updated with my findings and my final plan. Hopefully it can be of some use to members here and encourage others to test their medications beforehand to make sure they agree with your body and you wont have any unexpected side effects.

I'm very scared to go through with this but it's my only way out (I don't want to hang) so I'm planning it as carefully as I can and as comfortable I can allow myself to be while ingesting literal poison.

Any critique to my plan is welcomed and I'm open to discussion about the elements of my plan. I hope we can all achieve inner peace. I feel so numb and just want it all to be over. Having to plan this out makes it so painful.
The 6mg lorazapema is hitting me hard and typing is becoming difficult
that's a good sign
I feel like I'm smothered by a gravity blanket.
It's been over a hour so even liquid dosing take a while to kick in as its bee over an hour.

I just wanted to say that I'm thinking of you and I am planning the same exit, should things get to breaking point. I'm sorry life got you to this position. I can all too well relate to your story, especially the loss of a soulmate. Except its my fault that mine is gone! I don't feel I've exhausted every avenue of trying to get better but it sounds like you've dedicated a lot to it. I really hope you feel there's truly nothing you can do, as similarly to what someone else mentioned on this thread, you're clearly still an intelligent and driven person. Sending love to you, whatever you decide.

 

[toofargone6969]

I just wanted to say that I'm thinking of you and I am planning the same exit, should things get to breaking point. I'm sorry life got you to this position. I can all too well relate to your story, especially the loss of a soulmate. Except its my fault that mine is gone! I don't feel I've exhausted every avenue of trying to get better but it sounds like you've dedicated a lot to it. I really hope you feel there's truly nothing you can do, as similarly to what someone else mentioned on this thread, you're clearly still an intelligent and driven person. Sending love to you, whatever you decide.

Thank you, that's really kind. I'll make an official goodbye thread when the time comes. I'm sorry life got you here too... it's so unfortunate to find ourselves here and none of us deserve it. I hope you find some way to recover and get better. I do feel I've exhausted all my options because what I want to truly be ok with life just isnt attainable for me. Thanks for your kind message <3

 

[LaVieEnRose]

I really want to do the same week. I've possessed SN for over a year now. It wss actually almost discovered recently after remaining stashed away in the same spot for over a year. Is that a sign to get going with it? I'm afraid of failure more than anything, more than the experience though that's not cheery either. Coming around in the ICU after over suffering and contemplating for so long....that would be my worst nightmare.

Fasting is going to be a pain in the ass especially since I get hungry and thirsty easily. It will be hard to decide what I want to consume last.

You have all the necessary materials for as peaceful an experience as possible. I hope it is so and that whatever unpleasantness is as mild and short-lived as possible.

Wish I could literally just shut off on my own without having to do anything external.

 

[toofargone6969]

I really want to do the same week. I've possessed SN for over a year now. It wss actually almost discovered recently after remaining stashed away in the same spot for over a year. Is that a sign to get going with it? I'm afraid of failure more than anything, more than the experience though that's not cheery either. Coming around in the ICU after over suffering and contemplating for so long....that would be my worst nightmare.

Fasting is going to be a pain in the ass especially since I get hungry and thirsty easily. It will be hard to decide what I want to consume last.

You have all the necessary materials for as peaceful an experience as possible. I hope it is so and that whatever unpleasantness is as mild and short-lived as possible.

Wish I could literally just shut off on my own without having to do anything external.

I'm afraid of failure too and being in the hospital since I'm terrified of people other than my family. I think only you can know if it's a sign that the time is right. Fasting will be hard for me too, and I drink a lot of water so I'm not looking forward to restricting my intake. Its very sad this is the best option for us in the absence of N or other peaceful options. Inert gas and CO are not possible for me. I hope your experience is peaceful also and that you have the meds you need.

I'll be making an official goodbye thread with my updated regimen and I'll do my best to post updates after I take the SN for as long as I can.

A shut off switch would be nice. This process of planning and executing with the fasting, meds, and discomfort is quite excruciating mentally. I just want it to be over.

 

[Praestat_Mori]

I wish you all the best with your plan. I hope you find peace!