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Why does he hate you? Wanna share? I'm here if you need to vent
That's harsh. I have this weird thing that I care so much about how everyone will react about me ctb. I don't wanna hurt anyone I love even more, but deep inside, I just want them to know so bad, so so so fucking bad. Maybe that's just me screaming for help or being selfish. I don't know anymore. I don't really know me.
All of this is harsh. We're actively planning our deaths. If you've never told anyone ever how you feel you should try at least once. My family doesn't really give a shit, most people don't really give a shit, but there are definitely people who do, who will try to be there for you, and having just one of those people can change stuff for a person.
I don't know why :/ I wish I did so I could fix whatever is wrong with me. I've tried asking him, but he just won't talk to me. He's the only person that ever actually cared about me and I don't know what I did to make him stop.
Maybe is not even your fault. People change, unfortunately. Like, I did everything I could for some people and still got left behind. So... It's like, sometimes, no matter what we do, we are just not enough for them. But still, you are worth of being loved, being trusted, being hugged, so please, remember that. You did everything you could!
Yeah, my family loves me and it tears me apart that i'm going to hurt them like that. I wish i could be different but ctb is my only exit. I have nothing else. At least, it's how I feel.
If it was something as simple as not getting along he would've told me that, and we did get along very well. People only go completely silent and block you when you've done something to make them hate you. I just wish people would tell me what it was.
