Venting should i ask for help?

[dkdkdkdkkd]

So, I feel kind of confused on whether i should seek help or not. Here's my situation: This year I was supposed to move to another country and study there, however I got rejected from getting a visa and didn't get any answer on my appeal. I took it lightly understanding that it's okay I will just have a gap year and will go there next year. However, even though I was getting better and more hopeful the suicidal thoughts came back because I just don't want to keep on going, I don't want anything and I just want to die because I don't want to work hard to live. I am not planning on ctb in the mean time, but maybe in 2-3 months, so it'll be a more thoughtful decision if I will decide to do it. However, I thought maybe I should reach out to my friends and ask for help, because this feels like a depressive episode and maybe it'll go away in some time. But, I just don't know if I should share this with anyone because I think all of us understand that this topic is very hard to discuss, especially with people who (I believe) care about you. I feel confused. Also, if you think that I should share with someone close about this, maybe you have ideas on how to do that? Tbh I never asked anyone for help, which may be the reason why I feel so confused about how to explain my feelings and I'm also afraid of being kind of a burden because I don't think that someone can really help me

 

[Exiled]

Thank you for sharing that with us. I think that if you are having doubts and are wondering if you should reach out for help, the answer sounds like a yes. Do you have a very trusted close friend that you can gently bring this up to? You don't even have to go into detail or mention the depth of your suicidal feelings. Perhaps you could start with sharing that you are having a deep depressive episode and need some support/listening ear?

 

[dkdkdkdkkd]

Thank you for sharing that with us. I think that if you are having doubts and are wondering if you should reach out for help, the answer sounds like a yes. Do you have a very trusted close friend that you can gently bring this up to? You don't even have to go into detail or mention the depth of your suicidal feelings. Perhaps you could start with sharing that you are having a deep depressive episode and need some support/listening ear?

Thanks for your reply, I really appreciate it. I'll try to reach out to someone, hopefully it will go okay

 

[SVEN]

You could perhaps try a suicide helpline, just to see how you feel actually articulating your thoughts out loud. The advice you get will vary greatly from the volunteer you speak to, from all accounts, so it can be fairly random.