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dopaminedeath

Death please
Nov 12, 2022
171
Looking for others in my situation. Recently its hard to find goodbye threads that are actually complete. Also wondering if there are others who set a date here and then did it.
 
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Forveleth

I knew I forgot to do something when I was 15...
Mar 26, 2024
2,247
Is there a particular reason you're looking for these? Just curious.

Most of the time setting a particular date puts more pressure on the person so they are actually less likely to CTB. That's why a lot of us here recommend not setting a particular date/deadline as a goal.
 
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dopaminedeath

Death please
Nov 12, 2022
171
Is there a particular reason you're looking for these? Just curious.

Most of the time setting a particular date puts more pressure on the person so they are actually less likely to CTB. That's why a lot of us here recommend not setting a particular date/deadline as a goal.

I want to make the wait bearable for myself. Figured when the day comes around I'll know why i chose that date. But in my head anytime after 16th of next month is good. It is to put some gap between recent wedding/birthday in family and my ctb..

Interesting about the pressure. If not a date, what do you recommend?
 
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Forveleth

I knew I forgot to do something when I was 15...
Mar 26, 2024
2,247
I want to make the wait bearable for myself. Figured when the day comes around I'll know why i chose that date. But in my head anytime after 16th of next month is good. It is to put some gap between recent wedding/birthday in family and my ctb..

Interesting about the pressure. If not a date, what do you recommend?
Personally, I've gotten my method ready and then just waited until I felt ready. I had tried to set a date previously and kept psyching myself out in the days leading up to it because I knew what I was trying to do. So for my last attempt I didn't think about it. I just knew that I had the supplies ready for when I was ready. One day, in the afternoon, I thought, "okay, this is it" and I made my attempt. Until then, I just kept living my life day by day.

There are definitely some people who have successfully CTB by setting a date, but, like I said, it puts more pressure on you and then you are more likely to suffer from SI. I think it takes a bit of impulsivity to be able to overcome any fear so making it more of a spontaneous thing (after careful planning and research) seems to work better for most people from what I have observed.
 
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dopaminedeath

Death please
Nov 12, 2022
171
@Forveleth Fair enough, thanks for sharing this insight
 
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UKscotty

Doesn't read PMs
May 20, 2021
2,447
Personally I think setting a date is a very bad idea. It will do nothing but bring on a sense on pending doom and anxiety.

Also, the way I look at it is that if I'm not ready today, how will I know I will be ready in X days?

Most people can't even stick to a date to start a diet, start running, quit smoking etc, no hope to stick to a date to CTB.
 
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dopaminedeath

Death please
Nov 12, 2022
171
Personally I think setting a date is a very bad idea. It will do nothing but bring on a sense on pending doom and anxiety.

Also, the way I look at it is that if I'm not ready today, how will I know I will be ready in X days?
Thank you, I'll keep this in mind.
 

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