Post something funny

[Swisher]

I can't stop watching this, send help (watch w/ audio)

https://streamable.com/ux04l

((had to re-upload this, hope it works this time @Swisher!!!))

I posted one for you! I love dogs!!!

 

[Swisher]

 

[Swisher]

 

[Hopeless_soul]

 

[Jane Doe]

 

[Jane Doe]

 

[Thewhowithin69]

[QUOTE="gingerplum, post: 177674, member: 3804"

The ability to make otherwise painful or uncomfortable subjects funny is the type of black or gallows humor that I find funniest, especially done with Oswalt's intelligence.

THIS is a common trait of those of us from medical professions....I was always so shocked when someone didn't find death (bodily functions) funny, but then my father (physician, obgyn) sent notes to school on notepads for oral contraseptives with full reproductive organ drawing in background and I didn't think that was wierd....I also never understand why the teacher or secretary seemed so red after reading said note. I went to a fundamentalist/conservative cult religious school!! Lol oh the ironies of my life....gotta laugh, no??

One thing for sure, there's probably nothing less funny than overanalyzing a joke, so I'll stop myself at that.[/QUOTE]
This is true and yet you came accross as sweet imo....

 

[Thewhowithin69]

[QUOTE="gingerplum, post: 177674, member: 3804"

The ability to make otherwise painful or uncomfortable subjects funny is the type of black or gallows humor that I find funniest, especially done with Oswalt's intelligence.

THIS is a common trait of those of us from medical professions....I was always so shocked when someone didn't find death (bodily functions) funny, but then my father (physician, obgyn) sent notes to school on notepads for oral contraseptives with full reproductive organ drawing in background and I didn't think that was wierd....I also never understand why the teacher or secretary seemed so red after reading said note. I went to a fundamentalist/conservative cult religious school!! Lol oh the ironies of my life....gotta laugh, no??

One thing for sure, there's probably nothing less funny than overanalyzing a joke, so I'll stop myself at that.

This is true and yet you came accross as sweet imo....[/QUOTE]
Shit I fucked that all up didn't I?
I have no online cred...obviously I don't know what I'm doing on forums!! I don't even do Facebook so I'll return to under my rock haha

 

[gingerplum]

This is true and yet you came accross as sweet imo....

Shit I fucked that all up didn't I?
I have no online cred...obviously I don't know what I'm doing on forums!! I don't even do Facebook so I'll return to under my rock haha[/QUOTE]

I agree completely :)

 

[stellabelle]

 

[Jane Doe]

@Johnnythefox

 

[Johnnythefox]

View attachment 5941 @Johnnythefox

Yep, that's me to a T.

 

[Jane Doe]

Yep, that's me to a T.

The majority of people on this site tbh

 

[Johnnythefox]

A young couple on their wedding night were in their honeymoon suite. As they were undressing for bed, the husband, a big burly man, tossed his trousers to his new bride and said: "Here, put these on." She put them on and the waist was twice the size of her body. "I can't wear your trousers," she said. "That's right,'' said the husband, "and don't you ever forget it. I'm the one who wears the trousers in this relationship." With that she flipped him her knickers and said: "Try these on." He tried them on and found he could only get them on as far as his kneecaps. "Hell," he said. ''I can't get into your knickers!" She replied: "That's right... and that's the way it is going to stay until your attitude changes."

 

[Johnnythefox]

A man came home from work one day to find his wife sitting on the front porch with her bags packed. He asked her where she was going and she replied: "I'm going to Las Vegas." He asked her why she was going. She told him: "I just found out that as a woman I can make £400 a night doing what I give you for free." He went into the house, packed his bags and returned to the porch. His wife said: "And just where do you think you are going?" "I'm going too!" he replied. "Why?" she asked. "I want to see how you are going to live on £800 a year!"

 

[Johnnythefox]

A man and a woman are having dinner in a restaurant. Their waitress, taking another order at a table a few paces away, spots that the man is slowly sliding down his chair and under the table, with the woman acting unconcerned. As the waitress watches, the man slides all the way under and out of sight. Still, the woman dining opposite him appears not to notice. Finally, the waitress comes over to the table and whispers discreetly to the woman, "Pardon me, ma'am, but I think your husband just slid under the table." "No, he didn't," the woman calmly replies. "He just walked in the door."

 

[Johnnythefox]

 

[Johnnythefox]

Two girlfriends are chatting. "Have you heard about the new husband shopping centre in town?" one asks. "It's a four-floor building where women can go to choose a husband from hundreds of eligible men. The only rule is, once you go up a floor, you can't go down, except to leave the place never to return. Let's try it out." So, the pair head off to the shopping centre. Climbing the stairs to the first floor, they find a sign on a door reading, "These men have jobs and love kids." "Well, that's better than not having a job or loving kids," says one, "but I wonder what's further up." On the second floor, they are greeted by a sign that says, "These men have high-paying jobs, love kids and are extremely good-looking."

The ladies are tempted, but decide to go on. On the third floor, a sign says, "These men have high-paying jobs, love kids, are extremely good-looking and help with the housework." So, up they go to the fourth floor, where the sign on the door reads, "This floor is empty and exists only to prove that women are impossible to please."

 

[Johnnythefox]

 

[Johnnythefox]

A man and his wife are sound asleep in bed when the phone rings.

The man picks up, listens for a second and says, 'How the hell would I know, you idiot? I'm not a weatherman,' before slamming down the receiver. 'Who was that?' asks his wife. 'Wrong number. It was some jerk asking if the coast was clear.'

 

[Johnnythefox]

 

[Johnnythefox]

 

[Johnnythefox]

A man says to his new girlfriend: "Since I first laid eyes on you, I've wanted to make love to you really badly." "Well," she replies, "You succeeded."

 

[Johnnythefox]

Two cows standing next to each other in a field. Daisy says to Dolly: "I was artificially inseminated this morning." "I don't believe you," replies Dolly. "It's true, no bull!"

 

[Johnnythefox]

 

[Johnnythefox]

Q: How many divorced men does it take to change a lightbulb?

A: Who cares? They never get the house anyway.

******

 

[Johnnythefox]

A man goes to his psychiatrist. "Doctor, you've got to help me," he says. "I keep thinking that I'm a well-known psychoanalyst." "How long has this been going on?" asks the shrink. "Well," the man replies, "it all started when I was Jung..."

 

[Johnnythefox]

 

[Johnnythefox]

 

[Johnnythefox]