Porn

[CursedForDisaster]

nah, I always end up at the harder, disturbing stuff and then i'm shocked after, lol. When i'm horny it's the most fascinating, on-turning thing but after i feel really really bad.

I've stopped feeling bad, just numb

 

[KnightOfEnceladus]

My "porn" is mostly yuri manga for obvious reasons, and most of that isn't even x-rated. It's all emotional, maybe some kissing or gentle sex in some of them. Actual porn depresses me, especially because there's little of it made by and for lesbians out there and so, so, so much fucked up misogyny in the "mainstream" industry. I'm told it's all getting more and more extreme over time too. What happened to two people just enjoying one another for the sake of it and for their mutual pleasure?

 

[CursedForDisaster]

My "porn" is mostly yuri manga for obvious reasons, and most of that isn't even x-rated. It's all emotional, maybe some kissing or gentle sex in some of them. Actual porn depresses me, especially because there's little of it made by and for lesbians out there and so, so, so much fucked up misogyny in the "mainstream" industry. I'm told it's all getting more and more extreme over time too. What happened to two people just enjoying one another for the sake of it and for their mutual pleasure?

In reality I enjoy nice and sensual sex (as well as exploaring things) but when it comes to porn people like me just get bored and become desensitized to what they're watching, that's where the misogyny comes from... it's a thirst for lonely excitement

 

[KnightOfEnceladus]

That's horrible...there are real peoples' safety and dignity at stake here, you know. The industry is awful to women, and only getting worse over time. I will never understand why people get off on harming others or seeing them harmed.

 

[Santiago]

Define 'addicted'. I watch a lot of it, but so does 95% of the rest of society

That's horrible...there are real peoples' safety and dignity at stake here, you know. The industry is awful to women, and only getting worse over time. I will never understand why people get off on harming others or seeing them harmed.

You say that as if the majority of porn stars don't have a choice to quit the business. Most of them do. So if it's harming you that much then quit.

For the minority of girls who get forced it's terrible yes, but you won't find them on any of the popular labels

 

[Severen]

No. I don't even watch porn. It goes against my natural instincts. I'm not the kind of man, who enjoys watching but I'm the kind of man who enjoys doing... It's uncomfortable for me to explain... Let's just say, I'm the descendant of Viking warriors.

I always thought that if you masturbate a lot your "thing" would become smaller each time.So suddenly my "thing" just would disappear as a punishment.

LMAO! Who told you such a lie?

Fucking horrible, its the reason I'm a sad lonely virgin.

If it makes you feel better, having sex usually doesn't end up being anything like porn... Only once in awhile, if you are lucky. Most people who do porn are professional actors and actresses, after all...

 

[ExitTheDay]

I'll admit that I used to be heavily addicted porn, especially around the times that I stopped having sex with my ex girlfriend, just like with any addiction or habit (except hard drugs such as heroin, meth or crack cocaine) moderation is fucking key

 

[bitterness]

tbh its kinda weird. idk. not a good indicator of a healthy sex life, i mean to say that porn is unrealistic and fucked up my sex drive lmfaO
not to mention its weird like,, when i see the "ddlg" things (no hate to people who partake in that!! as long as you're consenting its awesome that you enjoy that ig) but it makes me flashback to the moments in my childhood where i was taken advantage of. sure ill watch porn but mostly bc im bored

 

[spanishguy22]

Am I the only one who can literally go for days without feeling a sexual urge without sexual stimuli? I can get completely horny if I force myself to watch porn, but I can't be arsed in the first place if I don't feel horny. Idk seems like an awful libido

 

[KnightOfEnceladus]

Try peoples drawings instead? There are sites that host all kinds of x-rated artwork and you can follow your favorite pairings and see how different artists draw them.

 

[Severen]

Am I the only one who can literally go for days without feeling a sexual urge without sexual stimuli? I can get completely horny if I force myself to watch porn, but I can't be arsed in the first place if I don't feel horny. Idk seems like an awful libido

Nah, it is normal for a lot of guys. It's a myth that all men are horny animals who want to fuck 24/7... Some people are hyper sexual. Not all of us. I'd only be concerned if you can go for months without feeling a sexual urge.

 

[Help_Me]

I watched it probably 3 or 4 times in my entire life, just because of boredom. Did not really make an effect on me, sometimes it even failed at making me horny. I mean, I get more interesting emotions while watching some other things, like good old horror movies. I think porn is a bit overrated, but I know this is subjective.

 

[Severen]

I watched it probably 3 or 4 times in my entire life, just because of boredom. Did not really make an effect on me, sometimes it even failed at making me horny. I mean, I get more interesting emotions while watching some other things, like good old horror movies. I think porn is a bit overrated, but I know this is subjective.

Yeah, not everyone gets turned on by the same kind of stuff.

 

[DetachedDreamer97]

Anyone else here severely addicted to porn?

As embarrassing as it is, yes.

 

[Jean Améry]

Addicted? No. There is the tendency to watch things that are somewhat extreme which I don't think is healthy at all. A lot of mainstream porn is rather mysogynistic and while I think everything that goes on between consenting adults is morally ok it's not how I want to treat women.

Amateur porn (where's there's a clear connection between the actors) and lesbian porn are less offensive that way and of course there's always erotic literature like literotica although a lot of stuff is rather badly written and this to me is a turn-off.

Those who have problem with porn addiction probably try to adress a personal issue. I don't think porn by itself and used non-compulsively with a clear understanding it's just fantasy and not real life is a problem. The moral outrage that surrounds it seems rather ridiculous to me.

 

[CursedForDisaster]

As embarrassing as it is, yes.

We aren't alone man

 

[Rocksandsand]

Define 'addicted'. I watch a lot of it, but so does 95% of the rest of society


You say that as if the majority of porn stars don't have a choice to quit the business. Most of them do. So if it's harming you that much then quit.

For the minority of girls who get forced it's terrible yes, but you won't find them on any of the popular labels

Hey so I have been a sex worker, dominatrix, camgirl and been in porn. And the VAST MAJORITY of women in these fields aren't exactly spoilt for choice when it comes to work. It's not necessarily that the performers or workers are 'forced' in the conventional sense, but we are certainly forced by circumstance. Some women have kids and are single parents with no support, some are experiencing significant socioeconomic factors that make a well paying job almost impossible to get, and some still are in entrenched poverty cycles.

I'm not saying it's all adult entertainers, but it's the majority of female and trans workers. People generally don't aspire to be in adult entertainment, and a lot that say they do are lying to maintain a fantasy for the clientele.

 

[Santiago]

Hey so I have been a sex worker, dominatrix, camgirl and been in porn. And the VAST MAJORITY of women in these fields aren't exactly spoilt for choice when it comes to work. It's not necessarily that the performers or workers are 'forced' in the conventional sense, but we are certainly forced by circumstance. Some women have kids and are single parents with no support, some are experiencing significant socioeconomic factors that make a well paying job almost impossible to get, and some still are in entrenched poverty cycles.

I'm not saying it's all adult entertainers, but it's the majority of female and trans workers. People generally don't aspire to be in adult entertainment, and a lot that say they do are lying to maintain a fantasy for the clientele.

I respect that, but surely porn is not the only possible way out of that situation? I am genuinely curious. You know better than me as you have the experience, but I find it hard to believe there are no other options.

 

[Rocksandsand]

I respect that, but surely porn is not the only possible way out of that situation? I am genuinely curious. You know better than me as you have the experience, but I find it hard to believe there are no other options.

I want you to substitute 'porn' with 'suicide' in that statement and then re-read it.

I don't mean for that to sound rude. But I need to highlight that if you haven't felt that kind of trapped desperate feeling about income security, I am probably not going to be able to make it understandable from explaining it - the same way most people don't understand the circumstances that make suicide feel like the only option

 

[Santiago]

I want you to substitute 'porn' with 'suicide' in that statement and then re-read it.

I don't mean for that to sound rude. But I need to highlight that if you haven't felt that kind of trapped desperate feeling about income security, I am probably not going to be able to make it understandable from explaining it - the same way most people don't understand the circumstances that make suicide feel like the only option

No. I know exactly what's it like to have no income security and having to take care of my little sibling. I also know I worked my ass of at multiple jobs to make that income. So why do you feel like porn was the only option?

The difference between the comparison you are making is that suicide truly is the only option when you want death

 

[stellabelle]

I find it boring. I used to like scrolling through erotic blogs on tumblr before they banned adult content. I don't really like videos but tolerated them for a short time after tumblr changed their TOS. Only with the volume off. Can't stand the noise. Gifs were better.

 

[Rocksandsand]

No. I know exactly what's it like to have no income security and having to take care of my little sibling. I also know I worked my ass of at multiple jobs to make that income. So why do you feel like porn was the only option?

Right, so that's your personal conception and experience of poverty. In the same way someone can be depressed but not understand suicidality.

Adult entertainment was the only option for me because my mother was diagnosed with terminal cancer and I needed the largest pay for the least time. I was also essentially unemployable in any mainstream industry because I was severely depressed at the time. I didn't want to do anything illegal, so this was my option.

 

[Severen]

No. I know exactly what's it like to have no income security and having to take care of my little sibling. I also know I worked my ass of at multiple jobs to make that income. So why do you feel like porn was the only option?

The difference between the comparison you are making is that suicide truly is the only option when you want death

Well working your ass off sucks. And how can you really take care of a kid if you are always working? And a lot of women who turn to porn are also drug addicts. And drugs are not cheap.

 

[Santiago]

Right, so that's your personal conception and experience of poverty. In the same way someone can be depressed but not understand suicidality.

Adult entertainment was the only option for me because my mother was diagnosed with terminal cancer and I needed the largest pay for the least time. I was also essentially unemployable in any mainstream industry because I was severely depressed at the time. I didn't want to do anything illegal, so this was my option.

Aha there we go. It was the large pay. As expected.
Now in your situation that is understandable and I can respect that. But let's not act like all porn stars are in that situation.

Nothing wrong with going for the large pay regardless btw, but that was not the point. The point was that they were being forced to.

 

[Rocksandsand]

Aha there we go. It was the large pay. As expected.
Now in your situation that is understandable and I can respect that. But let's not act like all porn stars are in that situation.

I can say quite comfortably that the majority are. If you start speaking to the girls in brothels or strip clubs (and you aren't a client), it rapidly becomes clear that no one is there for a love of the work.

Well working your ass off sucks. And how can you really take care of a kid if you are always working? And a lot of women who turn to porn are also drug addicts. And drugs are not cheap.

Mmm I don't think you have much of a foundation there. The women I worked with were more concerned about paying rent than anything else. We used to have a running joke in the brothel that you know the industry is going to shit when the hookers don't even spend their money on coke...

 

[Hayalet]

Anyone else here severely addicted to porn?

I'm not sure if I'm addicted...but sometimes that and masturbation are the only thing that gets me to sleep.

 

[Santiago]

I can say quite comfortably that the majority are. If you start speaking to the girls in brothels or strip clubs (and you aren't a client), it rapidly becomes clear that no one is there for a love of the work.



Mmm I don't think you have much of a foundation there. The women I worked with were more concerned about paying rent than anything else. We used to have a running joke in the brothel that you know the industry is going to shit when the hookers don't even spend their money on coke...

Right I believe that, but they are there for the large pay? Not because they don't have any other options correct?
It's not like they all need it to pay hospital bills like in your situation

Now sure they have other expenses like everyone else like rent, food, etc...
Many people struggle with that every day, but get there aswell without porn

 

[Rocksandsand]

Right I believe that, but they are there for the large pay? Not because they don't have any other options correct?
It's not like they all need it to pay hospital bills like in your situation

Now sure they have other expenses like everyone else like rent, food, etc...
Many people struggle with that every day, but get there aswell without porn

The pay usually isn't larger over a year, it's just works out to be more per hour. So you can work less to earn the same amount. Which works for people in this position because poverty makes you massively time poor, particularly as women are lumped with carer work which often isn't paid.

I didn't have hospital bills to pay - I live in a country where we have decent medical care - but I was exceptionally time poor. So I could minimise my work hours and maximise income. That's what makes mainstream employment not viable - the time poor element.

 

[Santiago]

The pay usually isn't larger over a year, it's just works out to be more per hour. So you can work less to earn the same amount. Which works for people in this position because poverty makes you massively time poor, particularly as women are lumped with carer work which often isn't paid.

I didn't have hospital bills to pay - I live in a country where we have decent medical care - but I was exceptionally time poor. So I could minimise my work hours and maximise income. That's what makes mainstream employment not viable - the time poor element.

Ah that does make sense to be honest. I imagine that is especially the case for cam work. They seem to be able to make a lot of money an hour when they are 'popular' (although I don't know if they get to keep it all or have to give some to the site aswell)

I guess my initial point somehow still stands though that they aren't being forced (as in not having other options). It would mean all poor single mothers would be doing porn which obviously isn't the case.

But I do understand how porn is perhaps the most ideal solution because of the income/hour rate.

 

[Rocksandsand]

Ah that does make sense to be honest. I imagine that is especially the case for cam work. They seem to be able to make a lot of money an hour when they are 'popular' (although I don't know if they get to keep it all or have to give some to the site aswell)

I guess my initial point somehow still stands though that they aren't being forced (as in not having other options). It would mean all poor single mothers would be doing porn which obviously isn't the case.

But I do understand how porn is perhaps the most ideal solution because of the income/hour rate.

Single parenthood usually isn't enough on its own... the women I worked with usually had an extreme factor involved... A particular woman springs to mind who has MS and previously worked as a nurse. She had triplets and then a month later her husband died from undiagnosed cancer. The childcare costs alone made nursing shifts impossible. But porn and cam work completely fit her schedule and limitations due to her MS. She was forced by circumstance. Usual poverty isn't enough, there's usually something making that poverty extreme.