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LLawliet

LLawliet

Am I numb, or am I dead
Mar 3, 2020
55
Hi I'm new to the forum and I tend to channel negative thoughts into poems or songs

feel free to add your own creative writings, stories, poetry, etc.

please no negativity, only encouragement and (friendly) constructive criticism on peoples works
Song/poem #1

Put away my problems, hide behind the headphones
Scream the lyrics through my brain
Walk outside, feel the cold in my bones
Joke about my problems again
No one takes it seriously, my life is a joke
Scars on my legs, who's laughing now
Hoodie strings around my neck, I want to choke
But I'll play it off as an act, I'll just take my bow
So I put on my headphones
Turn them up loud
To drown out the the thoughts that swirl in my head like cyclones
As I look out the window at the night sky's undertones
Fingers on a fret board
Restart after my mistakes
Every time I strum I chord
I wish life gave me do-overs instead of headaches
So I pour my soul into songs
That I will never sing
Because I can't find the right notes to finish the damn thing
And these poems will always remain
As so, alone, boring, and mundane
Hoping to one day be sung
But I'll be dead before that day will come
Creative writing piece #1

Hometown Gothic
• abandoned train tracks run all through town. You have vague, hazy memories of seeing those trains run. The trains stopped running before you were born
• Riverbank calls to you. It is always calling. Whispers carry from beyond their graves
• A small creek trickles, calling for you to step in it, to hide. You do not go. You know to never trust the creeks.
• The attic has always had a familiar scent, but you could never place it. No matter how much time you spent, you will never place it.
• You see eyes in the trees. The trees watch from above. But the eyes are yours, and others will never find you.
• The peeling paint of the red barn is comforting. The darkened oil paintings in the house are chilling.
• Intricate diamond-dust mirrors and delicate crystal chandeliers line the halls of the house. It is stuck in time. It is everywhere and nowhere. You do not enter alone.
• Twisting trails will lead you anywhere, but do not get lost, or you will never be found.
• The concrete tunnel knows all your secrets. It reaches out, grasping for you with thousands of transparent, disembodied hands.
• The trees hide tripwires, you know where each and every one of them are. You still do not trust the trees • Follow the river, you cross tar-coated poles. You know you must not slip, or it is over
• Every corner, there is a cat. You do not know if there is more than one cat anymore. No one mentions it, but they all see it. They do see it, right?
• Bleachers face the pool. No one knows where they came from. They have been there since time itself.
Song/poem #2


All I want is to feel alright

All I want is to feel alive

But it feels like the pit in my head sucks in every happy thought

And my heart has just been forgotten and left to rot

The dark needs to be fed

So it creates demons to take over

The blood needs to spill

So the page won't be blank anymore

The musics all that's left for me once all my dreams are dead

But my thoughts will spill over the sound

So I use my songs to try to drag my thoughts to my dreams

Because they're the things that are supposed to be drowned

I need to escape

My head is a cage

The spikes in my heart will stay there

I want to feel joy

I want to be numb

The pain is what keeps me sane cuz it is raw and bare
Song/poem #3


I felt low again today

I get home and nothing's changed



Am I alive or is it just a game

Is it in my head

Am I numb, or am I dead

Sometimes I just need to scream

Let the pressure out of my head



I fell victim to the temptation of metal

Sharp point to my skin

Draw with silver, it turns red

Small scars, fresh and thin
 
Last edited:
SimplyTopHat

SimplyTopHat

Student
Mar 20, 2019
163
Silent Aggressor

Presumptuous,
How you captivate my attention
Without so much as a word.
Taking liberties-
Infiltrating, my inner most sanctum.

Arrogant,
How you feel the right to enter
The most intimate of spaces.
Assuming entitlement,
To what isn't protected.

Self-Fulfilling,
How your existence becomes fact
Transforming beliefs into reason.
Compelling adherence,
To your trifling existence.

Inconsequential,
How I fight back against your plight
You've taken what you want.
Powerlessness begets,
A lifetime of regrets.
 
LivideLamb

LivideLamb

I'm so decaying, feeling like an ashtray
Jan 5, 2020
340
Just wanted to stop by and say that I really love both of your writings! Looking forward for this thread! And hopefully I could lose my anxiety, and start posting some of my poems too.
 
SimplyTopHat

SimplyTopHat

Student
Mar 20, 2019
163
Just wanted to stop by and say that I really love both of your writings! Looking forward for this thread! And hopefully I could lose my anxiety, and start posting some of my poems too.

Thank you. :)!
I hope to someday see your poetry too.
 
A

ArtsyDrawer

Enlightened
Nov 8, 2018
1,438
Inspired by this.
---
[█▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒]
[█████▒▒▒▒▒▒]
[█████████▒▒]
...
[Loading complete]
...
[Username: ]
[Password: ]
...
Checking authentication
...
[█▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒]
[█████▒▒▒▒▒▒]
...
Username and password accepted.
Welcome back, commander.
...
[root@troy - root/log/bridge_log/recent]
...
Accessing folder.
Retrieving files.
Download complete.
...
[root@troy - /root/log/bridge: sort_files (reverse);]
[root@troy - /root/log/bridge: play: ship_log_1]
...
Loading file.
File loaded.
---
[ship_log_1]
Minor hull breach detected. Low sector.​
Risk level: minuscule.​
Breach size: minuscule.​
Fuel level: 99.95%​
Target: landing.​
Communication with bridge established.​
M: Commander, I've detected a minuscule breach of hull under the vessel. Please remember to extract landing gear to its fullest before landing.​
C: Acknowledged. We'll get you fixed after the next jump. Don't remind me of it again.​
M: Commander, there is a possible chance of vermin contamination.​
C: Acknowledged. Don't remind me.​
[end of file]

[root@troy - /root/log/bridge: play: ship_log_2]
Minor hull breach detected. Low sector.​
Risk level: medium.​
Breach size: minuscule.​
Fuel level: 75%​
Target: jump 2​
Communication with bridge established.​
M: Commander, the ship has been contaminated by life forms from the previous landing. Size has not been determined. Please change course to the nearest decontamination service station before you proceed.​
C: Acknowledged. Change course to Asaroth station.​
M: Accepted. Changing course.​
[end of file]

[root@troy - /root/log/bridge: play: ship_log_3]
[Custom log file detected.]
Minor hull breach detected. Low sector.​
Risk level: severe.​
Breach size: minuscule.​
Fuel level: 45%​
Taking that detour was risky. I hope the risk won't escalate further than it already has. We're infested, and I haven't updated the rest of the crew yet.​
While not completely crucial and definitive to the delivery, it is a worrying event due to fact, or myth, that humans are capable of adapting to most environments, regardless of how hostile those may be.​
For the time being the sector has been completely sealed off.​
Video feed from the few cameras left shows the humans having broken into the liquid disposal unit and dipping themselves into the tank. Disgusting.​
Considering its poisonous nature, it's surprising that these creatures aren't completely dead within seconds. Worse, they seem to be relieved by this and are drinking from it. I'm about to lose my lunch.​
Ironically, they're getting theirs quite plentifully down there.​
[end of file]

[root@troy - /root/log/bridge: play: ship_log_4]
[Custom file detected]
No hull breaches detected.​
Risk level: severe.​
Fuel level: 100%​
I don't know how to handle this. We got the ship fixed, but the decontamination facility found nothing.​
Every so often they come out. I don't know where they're hiding, but they're down there. Considering how they seem to nourish from the liquid disposal unit primarily and swift through the solids, they're there for a long time. At least until the end of their life cycle, unless they begin reproducing.​
So far they have survived one FTL jump of twelve kiloparsecs without any means of protection.​
As I write this log, they are arguing over mundanities. They have already established a basic hierarchy not far from that of a common Torlax. The largest one is now the leader of the pride.​
The only good, relatively, part of the situation is that they're located nowhere near the vital parts of the vessel, and thus can be replaced with the entire garbage disposal itself. Expensive, yet efficient. And that's assuming we manage to get away far enough from the mechanists.​
[End of file]

[root@troy - /root/log/bridge: play: ship_log_5]
[Custom file detected]
They are... interesting... disgusting, but interesting.​
They still live in the disposal unit. They've grown accustomed to it. They have yet to attempt to breach the sealant containing them, which is particularly strange, as one would expect for such terrifying creatures to infest and destroy our ship by now.​
The pride's leader has created this... thing... from the various pieces of garbage that come through the waste disposal. A large, hollow box with a smaller, although longer piece of metal coming from its front. The other two humans seem to be most amused and happy as the leader repeatedly strokes the hollow box. As soon as the leader starts pawing it with what appears to be some level of skill, the other two drop what they're doing and begin some form of playing in accordance to the leader's pawing. Some strange, impossible to understand game of sorts.​
The rest of the crew has been informed of our infestation and are planning to breach the seal and perhaps kill all three using long-distance pulsars.​
As of recently, I found myself opposing. Truly, a strange situation​
[end of file]
 
A

ArtsyDrawer

Enlightened
Nov 8, 2018
1,438
You are a very beautiful writer.
Thank you.
It's like... a quarter, apparently, of the whole thing. Simulating the command terminal (winkey+r, cmd.exe) look made it fatter than I've originally intended.
It was supposed to be much shorter than this, but I failed in making it, you know, normal-sized. Originally I wanted to make that "loading file" look a lot more, but then I saw the first and thought "fuck no!"
I'll try to continue this tomorrow. I have the entire idea, and plot fleshed out in my head.
Part of the issue is that it's sitting there as a sort of movie. More like an anime than a Hollywood production.
Second part of the issue is that today was a good day, so I don't know if I could actually continue it tomorrow. 2 good days in a row means very bad days are coming very very soon.
I'll try to continue this more, but can't actually 100% promise it tomorrow.
 
Largeletters

Largeletters

Alone
Jan 21, 2020
640
Thank you.
It's like... a quarter, apparently, of the whole thing. Simulating the command terminal (winkey+r, cmd.exe) look made it fatter than I've originally intended.
It was supposed to be much shorter than this, but I failed in making it, you know, normal-sized. Originally I wanted to make that "loading file" look a lot more, but then I saw the first and thought "fuck no!"
I'll try to continue this tomorrow. I have the entire idea, and plot fleshed out in my head.
Part of the issue is that it's sitting there as a sort of movie. More like an anime than a Hollywood production.
Second part of the issue is that today was a good day, so I don't know if I could actually continue it tomorrow. 2 good days in a row means very bad days are coming very very soon.
I'll try to continue this more, but can't actually 100% promise it tomorrow.
I hope your bad days aren't too bad. I wish you the best.
 
B

Brackenshire

Arcanist
Feb 23, 2020
468
Fragile are our emotions, they swell, sway and are crushed with the energy of our surroundings.
Hidden from the world as people pass thru looking at you but not seeing you.
Talking to you but not hearing you.
Voiceless we fade to a shadow, wispy tendrils of dust settling into nothingness.
Ceasing to exist, forgotten...not
 
SimplyTopHat

SimplyTopHat

Student
Mar 20, 2019
163
Silence of the Damaged

A collection of beings,
Crafted in negligence...
To fulfill an innate desire.

Captives living wordlessly,
Seeking to attain the out of reach-
Marching one by one,
Through crowded streets
They're offenders...

Inchoate lies:
Used to replace meaning.

Hold your dreams-
Lest they be stolen.
Shut your mouth-
Lest your words be twisted.
Close your eyes-
Lest your visions be misguided...

Careful-
Words are no more that wishes
Without meaning.

Shield your heart...
Lest the sound of silence,
Become the moan of the damaged,
And the ache of the forgotten.
 
Sweet Release

Sweet Release

Experienced
Nov 24, 2019
252
Hometown Gothic
• abandoned train tracks run all through town. You have vague, hazy memories of seeing those trains run. The trains stopped running before you were born
• Riverbank calls to you. It is always calling. Whispers carry from beyond their graves
• A small creek trickles, calling for you to step in it, to hide. You do not go. You know to never trust the creeks.
• The attic has always had a familiar scent, but you could never place it. No matter how much time you spent, you will never place it.
• You see eyes in the trees. The trees watch from above. But the eyes are yours, and others will never find you.
• The peeling paint of the red barn is comforting. The darkened oil paintings in the house are chilling.
• Intricate diamond-dust mirrors and delicate crystal chandeliers line the halls of the house. It is stuck in time. It is everywhere and nowhere. You do not enter alone.
• Twisting trails will lead you anywhere, but do not get lost, or you will never be found.
• The concrete tunnel knows all your secrets. It reaches out, grasping for you with thousands of transparent, disembodied hands.
• The trees hide tripwires, you know where each and every one of them are. You still do not trust the trees • Follow the river, you cross tar-coated poles. You know you must not slip, or it is over
• Every corner, there is a cat. You do not know if there is more than one cat anymore. No one mentions it, but they all see it. They do see it, right?
• Bleachers face the pool. No one knows where they came from. They have been there since time itself.
Song/poem #2
[/QUOTE]

Aw man I love Hometown Gothic!
I can imagine some badass Postpunk bass lines or Coldwave beats accompanying it!
Got me thinking all sort of melancholic imagery ripe with decay!
Silence of the Damaged

A collection of beings,
Crafted in negligence...
To fulfill an innate desire.

Captives living wordlessly,
Seeking to attain the out of reach-
Marching one by one,
Through crowded streets
They're offenders...

Inchoate lies:
Used to replace meaning.

Hold your dreams-
Lest they be stolen.
Shut your mouth-
Lest your words be twisted.
Close your eyes-
Lest your visions be misguided...

Careful-
Words are no more that wishes
Without meaning.

Shield your heart...
Lest the sound of silence,
Become the moan of the damaged,
And the ache of the forgotten.

Woah thats some powerful imagery right there!
Kind of like Simon and Garfunkel crossed with Roger Waters!
Good work!


Hi, well if any of you are interested I front a glitchy queercore punk band called The Perverts!
Heres one of my songs that I wrote today -

I Drew A Picture of a Unicorn

(Verse 1)

People my age are married with kids
They also own a house and a mortgage

All I'm good for is tight jam jar lids
My job don't pay and my underwear has skids

To be honest its really got me pissed
All my effort really turned to shit

(Chorus)
So,
I drew a picture of a unicorn
A happy smiling unicorn
It was not furry porn
Just a happy smiling unicorn
(x2)

(Verse 2)

I dont fit in much really don't gell
The Devil blocked my number when I got back from Hell

One time I got arrested when I was mentally unwell
The police were rough so I told them that they smell

When I was sitting there held in a cell
I thought this was really lame definitely not swell

(Chorus again)

(Verse 2)

Sometimes I feel like I'm reaching the end
I'm glad I still got my band and my friends

Fresh new gigs just round the bend
We might go on tour but that depends

I type my sad goodbyes but I never click send
If I do it too often they think I pretend

(Bridge - Scream UNICORN 8 times)

(Chorus again)
Silence of the Damaged

A collection of beings,
Crafted in negligence...
To fulfill an innate desire.

Captives living wordlessly,
Seeking to attain the out of reach-
Marching one by one,
Through crowded streets
They're offenders...

Inchoate lies:
Used to replace meaning.

Hold your dreams-
Lest they be stolen.
Shut your mouth-
Lest your words be twisted.
Close your eyes-
Lest your visions be misguided...

Careful-
Words are no more that wishes
Without meaning.

Shield your heart...
Lest the sound of silence,
Become the moan of the damaged,
And the ache of the forgotten.

Woah thats some powerful imagery right there!
Kind of like Simon and Garfunkel crossed with Roger Waters!
Good work!
Silent Aggressor

Presumptuous,
How you captivate my attention
Without so much as a word.
Taking liberties-
Infiltrating, my inner most sanctum.

Arrogant,
How you feel the right to enter
The most intimate of spaces.
Assuming entitlement,
To what isn't protected.

Self-Fulfilling,
How your existence becomes fact
Transforming beliefs into reason.
Compelling adherence,
To your trifling existence.

Inconsequential,
How I fight back against your plight
You've taken what you want.
Powerlessness begets,
A lifetime of regrets.

Damn! I think you just wrote the soundtrack to my life!
 
Last edited:
SimplyTopHat

SimplyTopHat

Student
Mar 20, 2019
163
Woah thats some powerful imagery right there!
Kind of like Simon and Garfunkel crossed with Roger Waters!
Good work!

Damn! I think you just wrote the soundtrack to my life!

Thank you, I've been writing poetry off and on for years, it's how I process experiences in my life/mind.

I type my sad goodbyes but I never click send
If I do it too often they think I pretend

This stood out to me, as I'm in the process of mentally composing my notes... I wanted to start with the one for my best friend, but it's giving the most grief &preventing me from starting. So I felt this.

Good job, definitely a unique song.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Sweet Release
Sweet Release

Sweet Release

Experienced
Nov 24, 2019
252
Thank you, I've been writing poetry off and on for years, it's how I process experiences in my life/mind.



This stood out to me, as I'm in the process of mentally composing my notes... I wanted to start with the one for my best friend, but it's giving the most grief &preventing me from starting. So I felt this.

Good job, definitely a unique song.
Thanks.
Yeah that was probably the most honest line in the entire song.
I am usually considered a quirky writer with an obscure sense of humour.

Also I agree its a good way to work through life experiences.
 
  • Like
Reactions: SimplyTopHat
Never Free

Never Free

Student
Feb 6, 2019
177
Blasphemes catastrophic.
Words burst from within.
Soul crushing.
Words feel foreign.
Can't be forgotten.
I pray.
Why I'm filled with evil blasphemy
Taboo of religion
Why I'm compelled to sin.
Holy name said in vain.
All these words trapped in my head
Words couldn't be held
Spat out instead
Good God
Just let me be dead
I'm trapped in the sin
Crawling out of my skin
 
LLawliet

LLawliet

Am I numb, or am I dead
Mar 3, 2020
55
I wrote this today, I haven't been very inspired lately and just haven't been doing the best...

Noises in my head
Words that won't come out
Motivation and inspiration
Nowhere to be found
Thoughts like knives
Boiling in my brain
Driving me to blood
Please take away the pain
I want to think happy thoughts
But all I have are fears
Anxiety and insecurity
Depression hate and tears
Shadows that surround me
Growing in the night
Even with the coming day
They won't disappear in the light
I want to write a song
Because that's what would make people hear me
But all that becomes is poetry
Just dark and sad and dreary
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: Brackenshire
LLawliet

LLawliet

Am I numb, or am I dead
Mar 3, 2020
55
I wrote this recently and it's one of my favourite poems/song bits I've written

All life is is broken hearts and caffeine headaches
Painkillers, hangovers, and spring breaks
Same routine, day to day
Everything we do to keep death at bay
Torn up drawings, Scuffed up knees
Split bloody knuckles and brain freeze
Anything to keep away my thoughts
Fighting, freezing, red-stained cuts

Also I know this isn't really a chat to rant, but I kind of need to put this stuff somewhere, I'm scared my boyfriend doesn't love me anymore. We had our first kiss right before quarantine and then we were quarantined away from each other but restrictions have eased so we started hanging out and whatever more, but it feels like maybe he fell out of love with me during the time we were quarantined away from each other.
 
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Reactions: NoGlorySoul

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