Passive Ideation

[Vink]

I've thought about it for as long as I can remember, though it didn't become active ideation until I was nine.

I never thought I'd live to see this day. Honestly, most days I regret not acting on it back when I wasn't so afraid of whatever, if anything, comes after.

People told me that if I sought help, I'd get better, but deep down, I knew it would always stick with me. I was right. Not a day goes by where I don't passively wish I'd just gone through with it. It's always in the back of my mind—even when I'm distracted, or on the rare occasion that I laugh. I even think about it when I'm giddy.

I'm just so exhausted. But I'll stick around, for now.

 

[empx a0354]

I've thought about it for as long as I can remember, though it didn't become active ideation until I was nine.

I never thought I'd live to see this day. Honestly, most days I regret not acting on it back when I wasn't so afraid of whatever, if anything, comes after.

People told me that if I sought help, I'd get better, but deep down, I knew it would always stick with me. I was right. Not a day goes by where I don't passively wish I'd just gone through with it. It's always in the back of my mind—even when I'm distracted, or on the rare occasion that I laugh. I even think about it when I'm giddy.

I'm just so exhausted. But I'll stick around, for now.

Life is so unfulfilling. The only reason I'm sticking to it is because I believe in an afterlife otherwise I'd be dead by now

 

[iwkmsssb]

it's always been at the back of my mind as well. it's been getting worse for me these days and everyday i wish i never woke up. trying to get help but i'm also very exhausted. hanging on by a piece of thread.