Venting Partial hanging, tonight.

[helppls//]

Hey all
I'm going to try partial hanging tonight - please wish me luck

I'll try reply this time if I fail

Will be using a belt, used a blanket in the past and the blood vessels on my face burst so everyone knew something was up

I will be listening to "I really want to stay at your house" while I do it since it's a very nice song

Been thinking about alternative realities lately and how in some I may already be dead and in overs I'll be living out my dreams, and I really hope that my friends in other realities can live with me how they hoped they could
I hope they can love me
I hope they'll never have to see me like this

But this is this reality, I'm departing this one and I will miss them all dearly
But if it works then, well, I was scheduled to die in here

Will miss you all, I know I don't talk here much and mostly lurk but thank you l for just being here
I wish you all luck in your journeys and
If anyone has any advice on partial hanging please let me know - I'll be doing it in a few hours <3

 

[NearlyIrrelevantCake]

Godspeed.

 

[helppls//]

Godspeed.

Thank you

 

[FuneralCry]

I hope you find peace, best wishes.

 

[athiestjoe]

I hope you found everything you were looking for and finally get peace & serenity.

 

[James Sunderland]

I can tell how much thought and emotion you've put into this decision, and it really speaks to how deep you have been feeling. The way in which you talk about your friends within other realities and wishing them the love that you feel you can't have here… that's really powerful. It sounds like you care so much about them, even when things feel this heavy.

You mentioned that song you will be listening to. It is a beautiful and really emotional song. Music has a way of capturing things words can't get, you know? Since it means something to you, I was thinking probably if you would open to talking a bit more before you proceed with your plan. Maybe what that song reminds you of, or what your favorite you could've been in one of those parallel universes? I'm here to listen if you'd like to share.

 

[helppls//]

I can tell how much thought and emotion you've put into this decision, and it really speaks to how deep you have been feeling. The way in which you talk about your friends within other realities and wishing them the love that you feel you can't have here… that's really powerful. It sounds like you care so much about them, even when things feel this heavy.

You mentioned that song you will be listening to. It is a beautiful and really emotional song. Music has a way of capturing things words can't get, you know? Since it means something to you, I was thinking probably if you would open to talking a bit more before you proceed with your plan. Maybe what that song reminds you of, or what your favorite you could've been in one of those parallel universes? I'm here to listen if you'd like to share.

I think if I could I would have been a fighter pilot, I wouldn't want to live longer than 30 no matter what since life is a bit of a slog past then anyways. I'd want to die in service so people could remember me as some sort of hero instead of a loser who just cries in his room yk?

I have been listening to the song a lot lately since well... I did rewatch edgerunners and it reminds me heavily of my ex, she's influenced a lot of my choices, especially this one.

Thank you for listening to me, it really feels like screaming into the void here sometimes

 

[JR_Timm]

Have a great journey Friend.

 

[James Sunderland]

I hear you, dude. Surviving only to be remembered as a hero, making a difference in life that's one powerful wish. And you know, just because life flies like a sandbag doesn't mean your dreams and feelings aren't important. You fight every day, even if it isn't inside the cockpit of an F-16. That does take quite a lot of strength.

It's no wonder that song is on repeat if it's one that reminds you of your ex. Memories like that can see a number of emotions. I can only imagine the depth of how her influence has weighed on your heart, especially with times when it feels like you're screaming into the void. But please know you are not screaming into nothingness right now. Anyway, I'm here, I'm listening, and I really do care. You are not alone, potentially, and I hope that much comes across.

Look, at the end of the day, I respect it's your call and free will's a double-edged sword, but just I want you to know before you do, if I wasn't there for you before, I'm here now. I am here to listen, talk, or even just sit with you in this moment.

 

[helppls//]

I hear you, dude. Surviving only to be remembered as a hero, making a difference in life that's one powerful wish. And you know, just because life flies like a sandbag doesn't mean your dreams and feelings aren't important. You fight every day, even if it isn't inside the cockpit of an F-16. That does take quite a lot of strength.

It's no wonder that song is on repeat if it's one that reminds you of your ex. Memories like that can see a number of emotions. I can only imagine the depth of how her influence has weighed on your heart, especially with times when it feels like you're screaming into the void. But please know you are not screaming into nothingness right now. Anyway, I'm here, I'm listening, and I really do care. You are not alone, potentially, and I hope that much comes across.

Look, at the end of the day, I respect it's your call and free will's a double-edged sword, but just I want you to know before you do, if I wasn't there for you before, I'm here now. I am here to listen, talk, or even just sit with you in this moment.

It's nice to not feel alone in the end, truly thank you, this almost makes me hope that something goes wrong but I have to do it tonight, just waiting for the right moment currently haha.

 

[James Sunderland]

I am really glad you do not feel alone at this moment. It's intense, waiting for the right moment, like everything is building up inside of your head. I'm here with you in this wait. If you want to share what's running in your mind, it's okay; I can listen. No pressure, just letting you know you've got me here. Anything that you want to talk about: your favorite parts of that song, the memories it brings-in, anything at all. Happy memories, sad, all included.

 

[helppls//]

I am really glad you do not feel alone at this moment. It's intense, waiting for the right moment, like everything is building up inside of your head. I'm here with you in this wait. If you want to share what's running in your mind, it's okay; I can listen. No pressure, just letting you know you've got me here. Anything that you want to talk about: your favorite parts of that song, the memories it brings-in, anything at all. Happy memories, sad, all included.

I'm going to miss one of my friends so much, I truly love him to the point where it could be a crush, he is so patient with me and cares so much about me even though I haven't known him for that long, I really hope I don't hurt him with this. He knows I love this song and I hope he can listen to it and remember me in fondness.

I am really glad you do not feel alone at this moment. It's intense, waiting for the right moment, like everything is building up inside of your head. I'm here with you in this wait. If you want to share what's running in your mind, it's okay; I can listen. No pressure, just letting you know you've got me here. Anything that you want to talk about: your favorite parts of that song, the memories it brings-in, anything at all. Happy memories, sad, all included.

I do wonder if maybe I should stay alive, keep trekking on just for him - sorry just thought to add this

 

[James Sunderland]

It sounds like your friend really means a lot to you, and you clearly care deeply about him. I can understand how it must be tearing you apart to think about hurting him. Perhaps we could talk about him a little more? What is it about him that makes you connect with him so? Sometimes it helps to talk about these feelings; at least the weight becomes lighter, if only for a moment.
Pardon me for my late responses, you can expect me to do so within 10-20 minutes of each.

 

[helppls//]

It sounds like your friend really means a lot to you, and you clearly care deeply about him. I can understand how it must be tearing you apart to think about hurting him. Perhaps we could talk about him a little more? What is it about him that makes you connect with him so? Sometimes it helps to talk about these feelings; at least the weight becomes lighter, if only for a moment.
Pardon me for my late responses, you can expect me to do so within 10-20 minutes of each.

He is almost like an idol to me, an inspiration, he has recovered from things I still struggle with and he wantes to help me heal but I know he'd be fine if I left, he's ready to help people and maybe watch them go.

Also it's all good, I have nothing happening right now aside from waiting haha

 

[James Sunderland]

He sounds like he's such an amazing individual, and I can just tell he means so much to you. And from the way he acts around you, I know that clearly, he really deeply cares about you. And it's gotta be that he sees something in you, too. Probably, you think that he'd be okay if you left him. But maybe he saw in you the same strength and potential that you see in him. Sometimes, it's the ones in our lives that believe in us most who inspire us. I wonder if he'd be willing to walk this road a bit longer with you, even when things feel this heavy.

 

[helppls//]

He sounds like he's such an amazing individual, and I can just tell he means so much to you. And from the way he acts around you, I know that clearly, he really deeply cares about you. And it's gotta be that he sees something in you, too. Probably, you think that he'd be okay if you left him. But maybe he saw in you the same strength and potential that you see in him. Sometimes, it's the ones in our lives that believe in us most who inspire us. I wonder if he'd be willing to walk this road a bit longer with you, even when things feel this heavy.

I know he will always be here for me I just don't know how much longer I can keep myself alive.

 

[James Sunderland]

I can never imagine how exhausting it must be to feel this way, even with someone as supportive as your partner. It's a lot to carry and makes perfect sense considering the way things have been constantly hard for such a long period now. If it were helpful, you don't have to do this alone right now. I'm here to listen if you want to talk more about what's been weighing on you. And for right now, maybe that's OK just to lean on your friend and let them help keep you grounded, even if it is one day at a time. You're worth that support, hear me? You really are.

 

[helppls//]

I can never imagine how exhausting it must be to feel this way, even with someone as supportive as your partner. It's a lot to carry and makes perfect sense considering the way things have been constantly hard for such a long period now. If it were helpful, you don't have to do this alone right now. I'm here to listen if you want to talk more about what's been weighing on you. And for right now, maybe that's OK just to lean on your friend and let them help keep you grounded, even if it is one day at a time. You're worth that support, hear me? You really are.

Thank you so much, truly thank you
I hope for whatever reason you're on this damnned site that you'll not be affected by it too much and get whatever is best for you <3
Maybe a day longer wouldn't hurt, even though bad things will come tomorrow, especially pain on my neck since I've already been putting pressure on it, maybe it'll be worth it one day

 

[James Sunderland]

That makes me glad to hear. One day could overwhelm, but whether it was partly worth it, that's something worth more exploration. I'll be here tomorrow, too, if you wish to talk, vent, or just someone with whom to share the weight. Bad days have a way of piling up, but sometimes when we take things just a moment at a time, they inch along a bit easier. Who knows? Perhaps something tiny will make tomorrow a little bit more bearable.

I hear you with regard to neck pain; that does sound really tough. I can only imagine it adds to everything else you're feeling. Is there anything that helps blunt it, even just a little?

I'm on this site just to help people who feel lost regarding decisions about their life, like I once did. I really hope you live long enough to look back at this interaction and all the ones we'll keep having to find some strength to pass on to someone else who needs it.

You are strong, so please do stay strong.

 

[helppls//]

That makes me glad to hear. One day could overwhelm, but whether it was partly worth it, that's something worth more exploration. I'll be here tomorrow, too, if you wish to talk, vent, or just someone with whom to share the weight. Bad days have a way of piling up, but sometimes when we take things just a moment at a time, they inch along a bit easier. Who knows? Perhaps something tiny will make tomorrow a little bit more bearable.

I hear you with regard to neck pain; that does sound really tough. I can only imagine it adds to everything else you're feeling. Is there anything that helps blunt it, even just a little?

I'm on this site just to help people who feel lost regarding decisions about their life, like I once did. I really hope you live long enough to look back at this interaction and all the ones we'll keep having to find some strength to pass on to someone else who needs it.

You are strong, so please do stay strong.

Thank you <3

 

[Marco77]

Have a good trip. Are you still among us?

 

[helppls//]

Have a good trip. Are you still among us?

Sadly yes, I did end up trying but I always feel like my head will explode and end up having to stop haha