Nowhere else but six feet under (or maybe inside a shelf or on a table or smth)

[deviantblue]

my first thread here, i'm trying to look for the flair thing but i can't really find it so i'm sorry about that, but this should be under venting


i have nowhere else to go but six feet under the soil,
i can't turn to my parents, i don't want to talk to my siblings, my friends aren't always available either

i'm not in a good position at uni either, even applying for a leave of absence needs a "good student with average grades"
but hell the reason why i'm doing so much worse is because of your shitty staff and students, and i've tried to hard to fit in every time

i plan to proceed with a 3-4 month break pursuing whatever creative thing i love into a potential career, anything that can flow continuously and land me something everything
and yes, i know, making a livelihood out of the arts (drawing or singing or acting or whatever) is a VERY, like VERY hard task to complete.
but i'd rather risk it all now
i'd rather have tried everything until a set date and ctb if i fail rather than live the rest of my 30-50 more years living life like my deadbeat dad and splurging mom

i feel bad for the very few friends that i might leave behind, my sisters who i have only been close to since 3 years ago, and all the stories and characters i made for possibly leaving them unfinished.

if i must go, i'd rather head out with a bang

 

[.idiot]

You said you don't wanna talk to your siblings, but also that you have been close to your sisters for three years now. Is it because you feel like opening up to them about your issues would just annoy them and bog them down?