Story None of my friends realized

[maxoffline]

Today I finally spoke to my friends after at least four months of ghosting, and most of the responses I got were dry. Then in the middle of me talking one of them said " I didn't even realize you were gone "

And that hurt more than I thought it would. I planned to CTB before my 19th birthday so my memorial would say "Forever 18" because that just sounds sadder than "Forever 43" or something

But now my birthday is 5 days away and I'm tempted to give it another shot. Maybe make new friends since my old ones sucked.

Any advice/input?

 

[bluebus]

I'm so sorry that this happened to you. That is a horrible thing to say to someone. Those people were definitely not your friends, and you're better off with that knowledge. I'm 19 and planning to ctb soon. It's not that bad, trust me. I get that you want to be put of here before then, totally understandable. I wish I had some advice for you. At least now you know that those "friends" weren't worth your energy. You deserve better than them. I really hope that things brighten up for you.

 

[adrenalinejunkie]

Happy Birthday! That's a terrible thing for anyone to say. What did you tell them why you haven't been around? Do they know you're struggling?

 

[maxoffline]

Happy Birthday! That's a terrible thing for anyone to say. What did you tell them why you haven't been around? Do they know you're struggling?

Yeah, I did, and they know. Slowly, though after venting to my dad about it I feel a lot better honestly.

 

[bepop:$$]

I can completely relate it's hard to value yourself when it seems like no one else around does. I say give it another try.

 

[kaidatenn]

Kai dont know, most of my friends are distant and I knows that. Making new friends could help but dont know if it will ends the same or not. In my case its always the same, no one even notice if kai is there or not. So kai didnt bother to make friends anymore. But you should try. Best of luck and happy birthday

 

[BojackHorseman]

My mouth literally dropped when I read that. I'm so sorry they said that to you. That was so cruel and uncalled for! They are NOT your friends and never have been if they are speaking to you that way. Please try to move on and forget them because they are not worth your time or mental/physical energy. I know it can be hard, but maybe try to meet some different people. I'm glad you talked to your dad about it, sounds like you have a friend there, try to remember that. I wish you peace and happiness and that you find some *true* friends.

 

[Is0lated]

Today I finally spoke to my friends after at least four months of ghosting, and most of the responses I got were dry. Then in the middle of me talking one of them said " I didn't even realize you were gone "

And that hurt more than I thought it would. I planned to CTB before my 19th birthday so my memorial would say "Forever 18" because that just sounds sadder than "Forever 43" or something

But now my birthday is 5 days away and I'm tempted to give it another shot. Maybe make new friends since my old ones sucked.

Any advice/input?

If you still have at least a tiny bit of hope then I'd advice you to hold onto it. Maybe things will be better, you never know. But I'm not stopping you though

 

[morendo]

those friends r a bit iffy
hey i never 'fully bonded' with any of my year group throughout years of schooling, but i got along well with people outside
and im sure you've heard abt the thing of 'the weird kids groups'
basically a proof that no matter who you are, there r always people who u'll find to be with
sometimes the people you are with circumstantially, are just not the people for you
right place right time
and its a hard process esp if ur introverted, but sometimes u just have to push urself a little to find others (ofc im dumbing it down a bit, but its gud to be a bit more optimistic - never know when u get lucky)
there r some yt vids thatll explain processes much better than i do
best of luck finding ur people (:

 

[LoiteringClouds]

But now my birthday is 5 days away and I'm tempted to give it another shot. Maybe make new friends since my old ones sucked.

Any advice/input?

Happy Birthday @maxoffline!
Though now you might not be fine,
On this yearly special day,
"May you find new friends," I pray.

I can't cook you yummy dishes,
So I send you my wishes.
You are considering to stay -
Please know that you brightened my day!

In this cruel world full of fiends,
It's so hard to make new friends.
If you want to, please vent here.
I hope we can drown your fear.

My advice: give it a try -
This is a place you can cry.

(Are birthday wishes okay here? Sorry if I'm weird )

 

[VioletNight]

I hope you're doing alright. You deserve much better friends than that, and they're definitely in the wrong for saying such a cruel thing.

 

[maxoffline]

Happy Birthday @maxoffline!
Though now you might not be fine,
On this yearly special day,
"May you find new friends," I pray.

I can't cook you yummy dishes,
So I send you my wishes.
You are considering to stay -
Please know that you brightened my day!

In this cruel world full of fiends,
It's so hard to make new friends.
If you want to, please vent here.
I hope we can drown your fear.

My advice: give it a try -
This is a place you can cry.

(Are birthday wishes okay here? Sorry if I'm weird )

Oh my gosh thats so sweet, I'm amazed.. thank you, man

 

[estrangered]

hi hiyas, i would have been in a rlly similar situation i turned 19 a week ago hehe so i feel compelled to add something here, happy b day 2 u :)! i hope u r feeling a bit better now... it feels like the end of everything when people you have known 4 so long and considered the closest ppl in ur life just disappear, but in some ways despite a similar incident happening at the start of this yr 4 me ive managed to come out a lot fucking better! people are insanely weird and unpredictable! thats no fault of your own, just bad circumstance. this sounds so fucking cliche but theres a million people who would value you like you deserve out there, but it feels impossible to reach them sometimes.. theres no use desperately clinging onto people who arent worth it, even the best friendships can expire and sour like milk, its agony, but theres nothing that could have been done, some people show their true awful colours and some just have their own shit happening, and that shouldnt need to impact you so negatively.. your experience on this earth can be so much more fulfilling than any box you feel the need to box yourself in. i dont know if this paragraph makes any sense at all LOL. but i just think you should allow yourself to explore by yourself, and through that you could find more/ better/ and reconnect w people, im happy youre hanging in there! and best wishes in this confusing age, sending all my support x

 

[Lys_C15H25N3O_d3]

you re 3 days from this im 22 days from turnin 33 , when i was 16 was very eager to yknow, get out of here, but now , never been that serious about it, basically prepping the same as you, the question is " can i wait all those days? its like what am i am doing? just waiting for smt.

But thinking of what you just written: "would i have the courage to do through 10 years more like you did or would have the courage to say not even daring to it? i am sorry i can't say anything useful..

 

[mimig1805]

that's really crappy of them to say that:( I understand that all too well, suffering and no one noticing or asking if you're doing alright, it is hard to find people that you bond and care about mutually but if this helps at all I did, my bestfriend of 2 years now loves and cares about me a lot. It took so long to find her but it was worth it, she's everything I wanted in a friend. at the same time I had a group of friends about a year ago that didn't care about me that much, it was hard but choosing myself was for the best. I dont have that many friends now but the ones I do have are more genuine and understand me more. If making friends irl is hard you can always try finding online friends in communities you have shared interest with! best of luck to you<3

 

[Adûnâi]

...And here I am who can genuinely forget a person (unless I respect you, then I'll remember you forever lmao).

I have only started talking to people on Discord this year, being 25+, but just as before, I find it difficult to keep my whatever measly social connections I seem to have. It's fairly easy for me not to talk to a person at all for weeks - because I have no idea why or what about. So, I would be the anti-normie from your story - those people don't talk to you because they have too many friends, so you have to vie for attention.