damn right no one listen; because:
https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/i-dont-care-about-you.102117/
even tho it may seem like angry words, sometimes ppl feel alone, hurt, empty and push other ppl away to escape pain. kindness to others, even ppl i maybe don't agree with or don't like, is always the least regrettable action. even if i want to go away myself.
This cruelty one dy sya listen listen see nobody all leave say wait nobody ther this real terrible, feel painful very this world cruel what do this give ,tell wait nobody answer all lie .all suffer lonely all alone other only pretend one tging happen all disappear , suffer black dark world all lone trauma damage everything vegetable nobody me all left alone, people fake say thing one happen nobody theee. Real tired not want human anymore
this really is a problem for me too, in my life. i was always 'different' but the sort that gets complimented. but the difficult parts, nobody wants to take that. just the good. so they left me with all the hardship, i guess thats how it happened. problem child or gifted child? decades sober or forever a useless drunk? beautiful or hideous? i can't see, never could. just know how it feels, and its bad when i like me but i don't like my experience in life, or something like that.
i stopped letting ppl say i love you a few years ago. it's always been a fuking lie, and a shiny distraction used to hide a cruel re/action. its much more honest for them to say it at all. and the few people i do care about, it makes me very uncomfortable for them to say nice things. not angry, but i can't directly accept it, unfortunately. and i know they do care, and i feel really sad that i might be abt to cause them a whole lot of trauma/pain by ctb. i could only trust them a little b/c they're broken too. i am so sorry to put anything else on top of their pile, but i can't find another way. i wish that didn't happen to you too CTB Dream, I like reading things you talk about. I wish people in your life were honest, kind, and accepting b/c you do deserve those good things. not fair.