No motivation for change

[Tionally]

I know life usually doesn't get better on its own. (that doesn't stop me from hoping that though) But I don't have any motivation to change anything. I feel empty/unmotivated all the time and I'm not happy. I'm at a uni that I don't want to be at (it's not that it's not in the line of my interests or something it's more with my lack of motivation), living in a dorm far from home, only seeing my friends and family on weekends (friends who I feel like don't care about me at this point and maybe I don't care too)

I don't care about anyone where I'm living right now. Sure I talk to people at uni etc but I don't even want to do that. I just do it cause being alone seems lame. I don't care about anything here. Only things in my old town interest me (though not much at this point)

I don't know if I even care about my friends anymore. Or anything..

I guess it's probably mostly because of derealization, depersonalization and anhedonia

Tbh I forgot the point of this post halfway though but anyway - I just feel empty/sad, I don't care and I don't have the strength to change anything cause it's too much effort

 

[catsrprettycuteman]

I feel the same way too, wish I could give some kind of advice for you but I'm lost myself. If you need someone to talk to about your situation, I'm here for you.

 

[WhatPowerIs]

I sadly don't have any advice to offer either other than saying that I completely understand. It is really difficult to wrestle with, but a lot of people recommend that you seek therapy, but they also admit that seeking a therapist who is compatible with you and your values is really hard work in and of itself, and this is the kind of work that an exhausted depressive finds incredibly difficult to do. I'm sorry. I don't care about anything anymore either, I just want to waste away...