I want my emotions to end

[trying ungracefully]

I wish there was a magical pill that stopped emotions. I don't care if the good ones are gone at this point I just want to stop feeling like shit over every little thing.

I want to stop feeling suicidal over shit I shouldn't even feel suicidal for. It can lead to it escalating which I hate because I just feel depressed.

I have to volunteer tomorrow and the only thing motivating me is that I have to progress my life. I really don't want to do it though and wish I didn't sign up because something always happens with my emotions the day before important things happen. I think it is my boyfriend unintentionally sabotaging me because a lot of times before important things or holidays he will get mean and fight with me.

It sucks but this time I am trying to not let it bother me because I have to grow up at some point and stop blaming others for my failutres even though they contribute.

 

[CuriousAboutThis]

I wish there was a magical pill that stopped emotions. I don't care if the good ones are gone at this point I just want to stop feeling like shit over every little thing.

I want to stop feeling suicidal over shit I shouldn't even feel suicidal for. It can lead to it escalating which I hate because I just feel depressed.

I have to volunteer tomorrow and the only thing motivating me is that I have to progress my life. I really don't want to do it though and wish I didn't sign up because something always happens with my emotions the day before important things happen. I think it is my boyfriend unintentionally sabotaging me because a lot of times before important things or holidays he will get mean and fight with me.

It sucks but this time I am trying to not let it bother me because I have to grow up at some point and stop blaming others for my failutres even though they contribute.

I can feel the same with some differences my suicidal feelings kind of ended well for now at least, now I just suffer from anger from what the people in my life did to me such as this one girl, AHM, can't type her full name well I can just not in the sense of making it seem like I'm doxxing so in this response I'll avoid naming her who I used to love set me up to get me raped by a police officer, now mind you I did attempt suicide because of it and attempted murder on my rapist the legal consequences have ended but deep down I still hate my rapist and also the girl I used to love, well I hate what she did to me, but I feel like I should forgive her or that is just the better side of me feels the worse side feels like everyone involved who led me down the path of nearly ending my life should suffer in my place, but sure the first suicide attempt was on me during my alcoholic stage in life, and I'm better now for the most part in my life but sometimes I don't want to feel human emotions.

 

[x9x99988]

I wish there was a magical pill that stopped emotions. I don't care if the good ones are gone at this point I just want to stop feeling like shit over every little thing.

I want to stop feeling suicidal over shit I shouldn't even feel suicidal for. It can lead to it escalating which I hate because I just feel depressed.

I have to volunteer tomorrow and the only thing motivating me is that I have to progress my life. I really don't want to do it though and wish I didn't sign up because something always happens with my emotions the day before important things happen. I think it is my boyfriend unintentionally sabotaging me because a lot of times before important things or holidays he will get mean and fight with me.

It sucks but this time I am trying to not let it bother me because I have to grow up at some point and stop blaming others for my failutres even though they contribute.

I experience emotions but rarely, i am just empty tbh. I dunno i just kinda feel nothing and nothing excites me anymore. Sometimes a wave of loneliness washes over me but then I don't care. I dunno I just can't bring myself to care about anything

 

[CuriousAboutThis]

I experience emotions but rarely, i am just empty tbh. I dunno i just kinda feel nothing and nothing excites me anymore. Sometimes a wave of loneliness washes over me but then I don't care. I dunno I just can't bring myself to care about anything

I wish I didn't care about anything sometimes, yet that isn't really possible for me sure there are times when I just don't care but later in life I'll end up caring about something or someone hopefully for the better and not for the worse.

 

[x9x99988]

I wish I didn't care about anything sometimes, yet that isn't really possible for me sure there are times when I just don't care but later in life I'll end up caring about something or someone hopefully for the better and not for the worse.

I hope things get better for you my friend

 

[CuriousAboutThis]

I hope things get better for you my friend

Me to I'll keep myself alive for as long as I can don't plan on making any attempts on my life, so that is a plus I use this website to discuss things I would not dare to talk to my therapist about.

 

[SweetChariot]

I wish there was a magical pill that stopped emotions. I don't care if the good ones are gone at this point I just want to stop feeling like shit over every little thing.

I want to stop feeling suicidal over shit I shouldn't even feel suicidal for. It can lead to it escalating which I hate because I just feel depressed.

I have to volunteer tomorrow and the only thing motivating me is that I have to progress my life. I really don't want to do it though and wish I didn't sign up because something always happens with my emotions the day before important things happen. I think it is my boyfriend unintentionally sabotaging me because a lot of times before important things or holidays he will get mean and fight with me.

It sucks but this time I am trying to not let it bother me because I have to grow up at some point and stop blaming others for my failutres even though they contribute.

well antidepressants usually can do that, once the effect starts kicking in after a few weeks you will experience a lower level of emotional response
this effect really varies between people though, some end up hate it because they end up feeling like a zombie unable to feel joy or sadness anymore, some like it because their previous state was so overwhelming that it helps them return to baseline again

 

[trying ungracefully]

I experience emotions but rarely, i am just empty tbh. I dunno i just kinda feel nothing and nothing excites me anymore. Sometimes a wave of loneliness washes over me but then I don't care. I dunno I just can't bring myself to care about anything

Have you ever experienced emotions? And would you prefer emotions or none

well antidepressants usually can do that, once the effect starts kicking in after a few weeks you will experience a lower level of emotional response
this effect really varies between people though, some end up hate it because they end up feeling like a zombie unable to feel joy or sadness anymore, some like it because their previous state was so overwhelming that it helps them return to baseline again

I can't have SSRI's and antipsychotics and mood stabilizers don't seem to have the same effect.