I really don't know how to start this or if it even needs to be explained. I have been struggling with depression (undiagnosed, google told me I have depression based of my symptoms 
) for a long while. I have times of feeling good, but for the most part I have always felt sad, alone, unwanted and wishing I could just disappear. I guess all that wish I could disappear worked, now I don't even feel anyone sees me. I struggle to communicate and I'm terrified to talk to people. I also struggle to look at people mainly, I usually just keep my head down and try to avoid people or any type of interaction. This has lead me to be extremely lonely and to feel unwanted. I'm tired and want to go to sleep and never wake up again.
Which is the question I have at hand. What method would be best and the easiest to have a painless way of going out in a sleep like state?
I have read carbon monoxide is great way to go, but the only method I have seen in movies are with a car exhaust. I feel like my SI would kick in and not allow me to do that. Another option I have heard that is peaceful is a fentynal overdose. The problem I have is I don't do drugs, and I have no friends or social skills so I have no way finding a way to get my hands on drugs. The option I wanted to use is the SN method. I have looked around and it seems extremely hard to get or find SN in the United States and it seems you need a bunch of other prescription required meds to help keep the SN down.
So, does anyone know a way to get SN or another method similar to SN that is accessible? I wish there was some OTC drugs I could use or even prescription drugs if there's an easy story to tell a doctor to get a certain prescription to overdose on.
) for a long while. I have times of feeling good, but for the most part I have always felt sad, alone, unwanted and wishing I could just disappear. I guess all that wish I could disappear worked, now I don't even feel anyone sees me. I struggle to communicate and I'm terrified to talk to people. I also struggle to look at people mainly, I usually just keep my head down and try to avoid people or any type of interaction. This has lead me to be extremely lonely and to feel unwanted. I'm tired and want to go to sleep and never wake up again. Which is the question I have at hand. What method would be best and the easiest to have a painless way of going out in a sleep like state?
I have read carbon monoxide is great way to go, but the only method I have seen in movies are with a car exhaust. I feel like my SI would kick in and not allow me to do that. Another option I have heard that is peaceful is a fentynal overdose. The problem I have is I don't do drugs, and I have no friends or social skills so I have no way finding a way to get my hands on drugs. The option I wanted to use is the SN method. I have looked around and it seems extremely hard to get or find SN in the United States and it seems you need a bunch of other prescription required meds to help keep the SN down.
So, does anyone know a way to get SN or another method similar to SN that is accessible? I wish there was some OTC drugs I could use or even prescription drugs if there's an easy story to tell a doctor to get a certain prescription to overdose on.
