Venting Need someone to talk to before ctb does anyone feel like this?

[reignerreigns]

I didnt even know the concept cucking...i met someone online with whom i believed i was gonna be able to achieve my dream, just have gf in real life, thats it. She left cause of someone else when she deliberately and constantly used to say she loved me, shed say she would never leave for anyone else, shed reassured me...i had never been the jealous type, i never even cared if a guy talked to the woman i like...but now, its like she developed the cuckold trauma in me and i realized, ive always been a cuckold...from seeing couples of the streets, seeing my cousins getting hit on by women, seeing idiots that never respect other getting laid, while ive been here working hard to be a better version of me, never to any avail..the universe despises me, its like what the hell was i given a penis if i cant use it? Why come into this world if i cant be normal?
I must remember all this tomorrow when my time comes, the only deterrent i feel now is my mother, maybe shell be hurt but i just dont wanna live like this. People tell me i dont love myself...i do, thats why i wanna ctb, cause i deserve better but this life just wont give it to me no matter my efforts. This is the only solution

 

[roommate]

I also get to see others pick-up girls while I mostly get made fun of.
I know that feeling.

But honestly, there is more in life then just a relationship, most relationships aren't even good.
Hope you find your way.

 

[reignerreigns]

I also get to see others pick-up girls while I mostly get made fun of.
I know that feeling.

But honestly, there is more in life then just a relationship, most relationships aren't even good.
Hope you

Youve obviously been in relationships, id kill to be in your place

 

[roommate]

Youve obviously been in relationships, id kill to be in your place

My longest and only one lastest 3 days and it was only troublesome so I had to cut it.
I can't even be in a relationship with my current state of mind.

I'm just not trying to sugarcoat relationships lol.

 

[Higurashi415]

Ehh I think you're overestimating relationships brother, not joking. You may not believe me, but you'll find out pretty quickly that relationships don't fix anything in and of themselves. Other than maybe sex, but you could argue that a sex worker would be better at sex than your girlfriend in all likelihood. If you wanna go that route, work out, get a good job, fix your mental health but above all else get a good job etc etc. Being a decent human being and treating females the same way you treat males will put you ahead of most guys.
What you'll find is that in the end it doesn't matter. But if you wanna find out yourself, go ahead.

 

[reignerreigns]

Ehh I think you're overestimating relationships brother, not joking. You may not believe me, but you'll find out pretty quickly that relationships don't fix anything in and of themselves. Other than maybe sex, but you could argue that a sex worker would be better at sex than your girlfriend in all likelihood. If you wanna go that route, work out, get a good job, fix your mental health but above all else get a good job etc etc. Being a decent human being and treating females the same way you treat males will put you ahead of most guys.
What you'll find is that in the end it doesn't matter. But if you wanna find out yourself, go ahead.

Im sorry but i cant you believe fully...maybe youre right about sex, trust me if i could at the very least get that id be better with myself, but i cant...you tell me to workout, i do, ive been doing it for almost 4 years now, i work, it could be a better job but its ok, i have hobbies, i do like my solitude, but feeling like a weirdo that cant even get laid or a gf? Like whats wrong with me? Its got to the point where it no longer fills me with sadness but rage, rage at me...break ups? I dont care about it, yes they hurt and all, people come and go, its the fact that i cant get a real relationship, i dont deem myself a bad person, not even bad looking, im different than the rest and thats ok with me, i like being and introvert, i like being a good guy not matter all the bs online telling you how to become an alpha or whatever, i am who i am and i love that but the sole part of me thats different, cant change and i wont accept is not being able to have a gf like most people do. Im gonna ctb out of sheer rage, im sick of waiting and things are gonna work out one way or another, id rather be the guy who ctbed at a young age than to die a 30 plus virgin guy