Venting My scars are healing and it sounds weird but I don't want them to heal anymore

[guineapiglover8503]

I haven't cut in like 6 days because ive been too busy to get emotional and relapse and my thigh has started to heal really well even tho most of them hit styro (the scars will be there for a very long time but arent too visible) but I don't want them to go. I have scars on my arm and they are so soothing to me and so are the ones on my leg and they help calm me down. They also are a great motivator for me to try and care for myself and I don't want that to leave. I am still thinking a lot about how recently I almost CTB and it wasnt even my method I just kinda had a breakdown and thats like a good reminder and helps me feel better idk i just find the texture so soothing