My psychiatrist is delusional

[dust-in-the-wind]

My psychiatrist knows how severely depressed I am. I spend most of my time in bed and I've been hospitalized twice this year. Once voluntary and the 2nd time he called the cops on me saying I was a danger to myself. Hospitalization was useless both times. They just up ypur meds and send you on your way. Therapy consists of arts & crafts and chair yoga. Although I did try ECT the first time out of sheer desperation but it didn't help:( I've been. on at least 20 meds and combos for this current depressive episode. It's not budging. It's been over two years now. It's hopeless and I told my psychiatrist that this week. He told me to never give up and keep trying. He has no idea how mentally painful this disease is and thinks 'someday' I will get better. !Either he is delusional or just ethically has to tell me tthat.i. I'm 55 years old and so done with life and bs platitudes. God please give me the courage to end it.

 

[Edu Ardanuy]

So sorry you've been through all this, feeling helpless. You always give good advice to people in here, you deserve better, you are a good person.

 

[Hollowman]

They'll say anything to keep their customers coming back. I'm glad I finally gave up on their bs years ago.

 

[PI3.14]

Ethically they have to say that. In fact, I did discuss this with my therapist and he told me how they could lose their license if they don't follow "the rules". That's why their position is always "positive", they will never change that.

 

[dust-in-the-wind]

Ethically they have to say that. In fact, I did discuss this with my therapist and he told me how they could lose their license if they don't follow "the rules". That's why their position is always "positive", they will never change that.

I think he knows deep down some people like me are not fixable.

 

[PI3.14]

I think he knows deep down some people like me are not fixable.

Yeah I totally understand u. I'm in a similar position, my dead body is being dragged among the living.

 

[dust-in-the-wind]

Yeah I totally understand u. I'm in a similar position, my dead body is being dragged among the living.

Yes same here...the living dead

 

[ShatteredSerenity]

Hollow optimism in mental health drives me crazy. They talk as if every single disorder and person can be cured, and it messes up society because people end up believing that grandiose delusional bullshit.

I was just struggling with this in a conversation with my wife, because no matter what I say to her, she is stubbornly hopeful that new treatment will lift my depression. She has zero evidence for that hope. She saw me go through years of treatment while my mental health declined rather than improving. I sent her articles showing that only a small percentage of people with my disorder recover. I try to get across to her that I have a degenerative disorder that involves physical damage to the brain, so it will guaranteed get worse no matter how I treat it. I tell her how the meds cause horrible negative side effects for limited gains. None of that sinks in for her, she still insists I could improve.

That false hope is useless to me, because I have to live with the reality that I'm stuck in bed all day suffering horrible mental anguish with no hope of improvment. Even my dreams are depressing. I can barely interact with people, even my children, because my brain is permanently stuck on shame, loss, and sadness. I'm just a sad ghost langushing amongst the living, quietly preparing for my moment to die.

 

[WeDontKnowTheFuture]

You should quit psychiatry, they do not have an idea of what depression truly is, it is not a dysfonction in the brain as a gear where you just need to put a little oil. Like if some pill could magically heal you because it is only the brain the problems, why do you think the brain work in a certain way? Because of the context of course.
Depression is primarily caused by the person's condition : by the environment, the problems,traumas, loss, the contraste between the desire and what is, etc
we can overwhelm certain condition by changing ourselves but antidepressants change us in a bad way, making us insensitive, disconnected, sometimes euphoric for no reason and with a superficial after-feeling.
The body doesn't support these drugs and so the side effects come. ( like sexual dysfonction by exemple).
I'm an advocate of psylocibin as it is a molecule that can change us for the better.
Psychiatry is a company that has no legitimacy and solves no problems.
Did you try other things ? Like all the alternative medicine. There are a lot.

 

[SVEN]

I always liked the thought that "The delusional build castles in the air, the deranged inhabit them, whilst psychiatrists collect the rent."

 

[divinemistress87]

My Psych doc is the same way drives me nuts. They want us to keep being guniea pigs

 

[Gl1tch3d G1rl]

I feel you, I too are kept alive against my will. I'm exhaused both mentally and physically. Really just trying to make the best of it until I have everything sorted for ctb.

 

[dust-in-the-wind]

Hollow optimism in mental health drives me crazy. They talk as if every single disorder and person can be cured, and it messes up society because people end up believing that grandiose delusional bullshit.

I was just struggling with this in a conversation with my wife, because no matter what I say to her, she is stubbornly hopeful that new treatment will lift my depression. She has zero evidence for that hope. She saw me go through years of treatment while my mental health declined rather than improving. I sent her articles showing that only a small percentage of people with my disorder recover. I try to get across to her that I have a degenerative disorder that involves physical damage to the brain, so it will guaranteed get worse no matter how I treat it. I tell her how the meds cause horrible negative side effects for limited gains. None of that sinks in for her, she still insists I could improve.

That false hope is useless to me, because I have to live with the reality that I'm stuck in bed all day suffering horrible mental anguish with no hope of improvment. Even my dreams are depressing. I can barely interact with people, even my children, because my brain is permanently stuck on shame, loss, and sadness. I'm just a sad ghost langushing amongst the living, quietly preparing for my moment to die. Nobody normal wants anyone to die so they will pump them up with toxic positivity. While maybe someday there may be a treatment for it, but probably not any time soon. No one knows what it's like to live in your head so they just telling you to keep holding on. I'm so sorry you have come to this point and find yourself on here.

Hollow optimism in mental health drives me crazy. They talk as if every single disorder and person can be cured, and it messes up society because people end up believing that grandiose delusional bullshit.

I was just struggling with this in a conversation with my wife, because no matter what I say to her, she is stubbornly hopeful that new treatment will lift my depression. She has zero evidence for that hope. She saw me go through years of treatment while my mental health declined rather than improving. I sent her articles showing that only a small percentage of people with my disorder recover. I try to get across to her that I have a degenerative disorder that involves physical damage to the brain, so it will guaranteed get worse no matter how I treat it. I tell her how the meds cause horrible negative side effects for limited gains. None of that sinks in for her, she still insists I could improve.

That false hope is useless to me, because I have to live with the reality that I'm stuck in bed all day suffering horrible mental anguish with no hope of improvment. Even my dreams are depressing. I can barely interact with people, even my children, because my brain is permanently stuck on shame, loss, and sadness. I'm just a sad ghost langushing amongst the living, quietly preparing for my moment to die.

It's hard for anyone normal to think death may be the best choice. They want you to hold out for a miracle cure, but have no idea the struggle every day just to exist. Sometimes there is no hope but no one wants to admit that. We live in an environment of toxic positivity. I am so very sorry for your situation. I don't know if you tried ECT but it can help bipolar. I tried it because I was desperate. It didn't work for me but it does have a 60%-70% success rate, so they say.

Hollow optimism in mental health drives me crazy. They talk as if every single disorder and person can be cured, and it messes up society because people end up believing that grandiose delusional bullshit.

I was just struggling with this in a conversation with my wife, because no matter what I say to her, she is stubbornly hopeful that new treatment will lift my depression. She has zero evidence for that hope. She saw me go through years of treatment while my mental health declined rather than improving. I sent her articles showing that only a small percentage of people with my disorder recover. I try to get across to her that I have a degenerative disorder that involves physical damage to the brain, so it will guaranteed get worse no matter how I treat it. I tell her how the meds cause horrible negative side effects for limited gains. None of that sinks in for her, she still insists I could improve.

That false hope is useless to me, because I have to live with the reality that I'm stuck in bed all day suffering horrible mental anguish with no hope of improvment. Even my dreams are depressing. I can barely interact with people, even my children, because my brain is permanently stuck on shame, loss, and sadness. I'm just a sad ghost langushing amongst the living, quietly preparing for my moment to die.

My Psych doc is the same way drives me nuts. They want us to keep being guniea pigs

It's all a crapshoot with these meds and combinations. I have had success for years on meds, until they just stop working.

You should quit psychiatry, they do not have an idea of what depression truly is, it is not a dysfonction in the brain as a gear where you just need to put a little oil. Like if some pill could magically heal you because it is only the brain the problems, why do you think the brain work in a certain way? Because of the context of course.
Depression is primarily caused by the person's condition : by the environment, the problems,traumas, loss, the contraste between the desire and what is, etc
we can overwhelm certain condition by changing ourselves but antidepressants change us in a bad way, making us insensitive, disconnected, sometimes euphoric for no reason and with a superficial after-feeling.
The body doesn't support these drugs and so the side effects come. ( like sexual dysfonction by exemple).
I'm an advocate of psylocibin as it is a molecule that can change us for the better.
Psychiatry is a company that has no legitimacy and solves no problems.
Did you try other things ? Like all the alternative medicine. There are a lot.

I've tried oral ketamine but it didn't work. Just got high for an hour. I might try the IV ketamine but it is a lot of $$$

 

[spoonfed]

My last shrink tried so hard to persuade me that ending it all was not an option, we came to an agreement that I wouldn't be taking that idea off the table as an option under any circumstance. She reluctantly gave in and we moved on to trying to deal with the problems, because if we worked on those things maybe things do go better but it's still my choice on whether I call time on things, if ending it is the solution (in our minds) then it makes sense to work on the problems that way we change our outlook and maybe the solution is not as final. That's my point of view what would I know, I earlier on another thread described myself as a suicide survivor but in reality I'm a suicide failure as it was 100% intentional just found to soon.

 

[dust-in-the-wind]

That's a good shrink based on the reality of your situation. I hope you are able to lessen the burden of your problems and keep on living.

 

[Electra]

I always liked the thought that "The delusional build castles in the air, the deranged inhabit them, whilst psychiatrists collect the rent."

That's such an interesting thought tho. But the rent is probably collected by more than just psychiatrists lol