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BobMorane

BobMorane

wizard
Apr 20, 2021
162
Just like the description says. I'm afraid I'll leave her totally devastated and that she will suicide too after I do it.
I know its nonsense but I don't want her to die I want her to have a good life. Im also afraid that she'll botch her suicide (she doesn't know about SS) and im not the one telling her about N or Sn.
So yeah im basically fuck... I have a human being life being threatened if I die. And I really need to go...
 
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Lawliet

Lawliet

b a n g
Sep 15, 2020
357
I have BPD and losss is extremely difficult on us. Thing you can do that is the kindest is leave her a note and explain very plainly that this is not her fault, and that you do not wish for her to take her life like you did. If you really feel that she will kill herself, what you could do is leave the name of the website so that she has resources. Don't encourage her flat out, that's not what this site is about. But be gentle and be human, show that you are sorry and that you care.
 
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M

mossyfox

Student
Aug 4, 2021
129
probably would be best to encourage or foster her relationship with another person before you go so she can lean on them for support. it will be devastating to handle. maybe set up a joint couple therapy and go to couple of sessions so she might keep going after, especially if you ask her to in your note?
 
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Mr2005

Mr2005

Don't shoot the messenger, give me the gun
Sep 25, 2018
3,621
Just like the description says. I'm afraid I'll leave her totally devastated and that she will suicide too after I do it.
I know its nonsense but I don't want her to die I want her to have a good life. Im also afraid that she'll botch her suicide (she doesn't know about SS) and im not the one telling her about N or Sn.
So yeah im basically fuck... I have a human being life being threatened if I die. And I really need to go...
Similar situation. She isn't bipolar but she will be devastated. It's a quandary. I wish I knew the answer. Minimise her pain anyway you can
 
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Alwaysbadtime

Alwaysbadtime

Enlightened
Jun 28, 2021
1,158
In my only experience bipolar is often misdiagnosed. Perhaps she is. I don't know. Just saying.

You really going?

I don't know what to say. Tell her about SS. Break up with her before you go. I don't know.

Sounds fucking hard. Perhaps don't go.
 
Sad.L0lly

Sad.L0lly

suicidal little girl
Feb 2, 2020
21
make her fall in love for someone else. Idk, show her some friend and try to her stay close to him till fall in love. When you leave, she will have this person at her side and she will try to forget you with this person. This isn't hurt you, will it? If you really NEED to go.
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
42,573
I'm sorry you are going through this. Suicide is a pain cycle, to end our pain, it passes it on to other people. Personally I would never be able to suffer just for the sake of others, it would be a painful existence. If you do decide to leave this world, I think a note could possibly help, maybe provide some closure but I appreciate it is a difficult situation. I wish you well.
 
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NearlyIrrelevantCake

NearlyIrrelevantCake

The Cake Is A Lie
Aug 12, 2021
1,630
In my only experience bipolar is often misdiagnosed. Perhaps she is. I don't know. Just saying.

You really going?

I don't know what to say. Tell her about SS. Break up with her before you go. I don't know.

Sounds fucking hard. Perhaps don't go.
Similar situation. She isn't bipolar but she will be devastated. It's a quandary. I wish I knew the answer. Minimise her pain anyway you can
BPD is boderline personality disorder, not bipolar disorder.
 
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return2dreamland

return2dreamland

₊✩‧₊ ˃ᴗ˂
May 16, 2021
58
i have bpd. best advice i have is to make sure she has someone there for her. she doesn't have to fall in love with someone else or whatever, she just needs someone so when you do go, it'll hurt a little less. wishing the best for both of you <3
 
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8evergo

8evergo

Mage
Oct 20, 2021
557
Menschen sich lieben gehen zusammen
 
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sadbadpsychogirl

sadbadpsychogirl

sonofabitch
May 29, 2020
725
In my only experience bipolar is often misdiagnosed. Perhaps she is. I don't know. Just saying.

You really going?

I don't know what to say. Tell her about SS. Break up with her before you go. I don't know.

Sounds fucking hard. Perhaps don't go.
the best thing to do (it sounds crazy) but try to make her think of you as "bad" that way she won't feel any guilt and will lavish in the attention from being a grieving spouse. (i know i'm gonna get a ton of shit for this). trust me, you won't have to try very hard.
 
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LittleJem

Visionary
Jul 3, 2019
2,644
You could distance yourself from her before you CTB - tell her you are too depressed to be in a relationship and then give it some time? Give her some time to process losing you?

I was worried my ex would blame himself, as he was trying to rescue me from depression, and I know that is not possible. I didn't want him blaming himself if I CTB. So I broke up with him a few months ago, as I was so depressed I could not walk down the street. I had spent so much time with him, while I was very depressed, often asking him to strangle me, and I just didn't want him going through more of it.

It's really hard because without him I am more alone. He is one of the few people I have ever felt really cared about and loved with and safe - so letting him go was hard. The chemistry had gone, and I was so ill - and those are the reasons I made that decision.

I am still here at the moment, don't know if I want to be...