Limerance object dilemma

[Sadmonster98]

I have a friend for whom i've developed feelings limerance in fact, i've discussed it in my previous posts also. She blocked me when i disclosed my feelings but later started talking again when i get better at managing limerance. She told me she cherishes our friendship. I told her about my limerance too.
She was inconsistent in friendship but appreciate how i help her during her tough times, she's a trauma survivor whenever she feels down or suicidal it's me she relies on and after her condition improves she disappears.
4-5 months ago she started being consistent and asked me if i still likes her to which i said i don't know and then she asked me would you date me if i asked you out to which i said maybe we should know each other better. Then i thought maybe maybe everything is falling in place but then she disappeared again. 2 months ago i got to know she got a bf, i felt bad but i was also relieved maybe she won't rely on me much and maybe i can fully get over my limerance with no contact. But these days it's she who starts texting and i can't stop the urge to ignore her. Even this week she talked to me when she was feeling suicidal then disappeared for the next 2-3 days, i kept texting her whether she was okay or not. She replied yesterday that she was okay just too drained to reply me back. Guys this has been her whole pattern everytime she feels suicidal.
I've been suicidal for years and i knew the feelings that's why i'm always available for her but my main dilema is it keeps my limerance alive by being in contact with her. Whenever I don't text her or she's late to reply my texts i stalk her social media to check whether she's okay or not and i keep on repeating it again and again. I've heard cutting off all contacts with limerance object is the only way you can get through it but there's dilemma in me disappearing from her life as she've always talked about i'm the only one she can rely on during her tough times.
My friends told me she's being selfish and you should be too.
But talking to her makes me feel alive again and when she's being consistent i'm out of this world, i'm no more seeking any relationship from her in return and don't want her to like me back.
But when she's inconsistent it increases my suicidal thoughts.
What should i do? Honest answer please?

 

[WhiteRabbit]

She doesn't sound like a very good friend, and it doesn't seem like she cares about you. I hate when people use TRUMA to be shitty. Block her and move on.

 

[Sadmonster98]

She doesn't sound like a very good friend, and it doesn't seem like she cares about you. I hate when people use TRUMA to be shitty. Block her and move on.

Thank you so much for replying but it's so hard to block her you know the guilt.
I hate how treats me, I've contemplated about blocking her but failed
What other options do you think i can take?

 

[WhiteRabbit]

Thank you so much for replying but it's so hard to block her you know the guilt.
I hate how treats me, I've contemplated about blocking her but failed
What other options do you think i can take?

Dude, block her. She isn't a good person. She only keeps you around when she needs you for something. People like this will always find someone else to use. She can discuss her troubles with her boyfriend.

 

[Dot]

If sh/ ds nt appreci8 u spportng hr whn sh/ = mst vulnrble & ds nt rspect u in rturn thn u nd 2 cre8 a boundry fr urslf - espclly whn sh/ = worsnng ur own suicdl feelngs

Imo snd hr sme info fr suicdl spport rsourcs & lke WR sd - blck hr & mve on fr ur own santy & wll--bein

 

[Sadmonster98]

Dude, block her. She isn't a good person. She only keeps you around when she needs you for something. People like this will always find someone else to use. She can discuss her troubles with her boyfriend.

Thank you so much for being honest.
I really appreciate it

If sh/ ds nt appreci8 u spportng hr whn sh/ = mst vulnrble & ds nt rspect u in rturn thn u nd 2 cre8 a boundry fr urslf - espclly whn sh/ = worsnng ur own suicdl feelngs

Imo snd hr sme info fr suicdl spport rsourcs & lke WR sd - blck hr & mve on fr ur own santy & wll--bein

Thank you. I really appreciate your honest advice.

 

[Forever Sleep]

I'm pretty sure I suffer with limerence too. Honestly, I was wincing reading your post because I feel sure I'd struggle just the same in your position. Really that any contact from them is so welcome but then- you know yourself what this is doing to you. It's especially complicated that it seems like she needs you at times. So, you want to be a caring and supportive friend, hopefully more.

You do have to think of you though. Plus, consider that it's always on her terms. That's not to blame her exactly. Maybe she really was too overwhelmed to let you know she was ok. But, I think you have to question if that's really want you want from any kind of relationship.

Plus, it's hard to let limerent feelings slide. In the past, I used to think- I hope I'll still be friends with them but really, I think it would have been too difficult.

I think you probably do have to make your mind up one way or another. If you can see this dominating your life for some time, I think it's perfectly reasonable to withdraw.

Rather than just ignore the messages though, I'd imagine you'd need to do something more definitive. Not rude of course. You can say that you do care about her well being a great deal.

However, you're struggling yourself at the moment and, you don't think you can be the support she needs anymore. Seeing as you've told her about the limerence- which was a brave move I think, I think you could say that that is getting to you and you really need to be able to move on.

It does sound like she's got you dangling on a string like a yo yo. Really, out of respect for you and your well being, she ought to understand that it's really distressing for you.

I've witnessed it with other people though, to be honest. I suppose their own feelings are muddled to some extent and, they have deep emotional needs. But, they seem to have little regard as to whose heart strings they pull at. As long as they feel supported. It just seems so insensitive really. It kind of makes me angry actually because I've known really sentive people get hurt so casually by others who just mucked them about. Maybe they were just confused but, they ought to have seen what it was doing to the people around them. I really hope you can resolve this.

I finally shook my limerent habits 10 or so years ago but, they dominated a good 13 maybe years of my life. I used to get myself in such a mess over my crushes. I'm sorry. It's tough.

 

[Sadmonster98]

I'm pretty sure I suffer with limerence too. Honestly, I was wincing reading your post because I feel sure I'd struggle just the same in your position. Really that any contact from them is so welcome but then- you know yourself what this is doing to you. It's especially complicated that it seems like she needs you at times. So, you want to be a caring and supportive friend, hopefully more.

You do have to think of you though. Plus, consider that it's always on her terms. That's not to blame her exactly. Maybe she really was too overwhelmed to let you know she was ok. But, I think you have to question if that's really want you want from any kind of relationship.

Plus, it's hard to let limerent feelings slide. In the past, I used to think- I hope I'll still be friends with them but really, I think it would have been too difficult.

I think you probably do have to make your mind up one way or another. If you can see this dominating your life for some time, I think it's perfectly reasonable to withdraw.

Rather than just ignore the messages though, I'd imagine you'd need to do something more definitive. Not rude of course. You can say that you do care about her well being a great deal.

However, you're struggling yourself at the moment and, you don't think you can be the support she needs anymore. Seeing as you've told her about the limerence- which was a brave move I think, I think you could say that that is getting to you and you really need to be able to move on.

It does sound like she's got you dangling on a string like a yo yo. Really, out of respect for you and your well being, she ought to understand that it's really distressing for you.

I've witnessed it with other people though, to be honest. I suppose their own feelings are muddled to some extent and, they have deep emotional needs. But, they seem to have little regard as to whose heart strings they pull at. As long as they feel supported. It just seems so insensitive really. It kind of makes me angry actually because I've known really sentive people get hurt so casually by others who just mucked them about. Maybe they were just confused but, they ought to have seen what it was doing to the people around them. I really hope you can resolve this.

I finally shook my limerent habits 10 or so years ago but, they dominated a good 13 maybe years of my life. I used to get myself in such a mess over my crushes. I'm sorry. It's tough.

Omg thank you so much it's really the best advice i've received in this post. I really appreciate how you thoroughly covered every point instead of blaming that person. I'm really sorry for what you went through. It really feels like a loop. I'm in this loop for more than a year

 

[Kali_Yuga13]

Block and ghost followed by no contact ever again. The red pill definition of this dynamic is "emotional tampon". She gets to use you as an emotional crutch and once she feels better she rewards her bf with sex, intimacy and actual companionship. She's regulating her emotions through you so she can be a stable gf to the other dude.

It's of no use to explain this to her nor how it makes you feel. It will only make her better at using you. It may not even be conscious for her, your availability is just something she's learned she can take advantage of for practical purposes. Limerence is an itch that shouldn't be scratched. There is no pot of gold at the end of that rainbow.

 

[Sadmonster98]

Block and ghost followed by no contact ever again. The red pill definition of this dynamic is "emotional tampon". She gets to use you as an emotional crutch and once she feels better she rewards her bf with sex, intimacy and actual companionship. She's regulating her emotions through you so she can be a stable gf to the other dude.

It's of no use to explain this to her nor how it makes you feel. It will only make her better at using you. It may not even be conscious for her, your availability is just something she's learned she can take advantage of for practical purposes. Limerence is an itch that shouldn't be scratched. There is no pot of gold at the end of that rainbow.

I knew no contact is the best option but the guilt on my part is getting me.
I also feel there's no point explaining her as she often misunderstood things when i try to explain
But the thing is i deeply care about her the only thing i hate is the way she treats me.

 

[Kali_Yuga13]

I knew no contact is the best option but the guilt on my part is getting me.

I commend you for your bravery and openness for posting this. I never heard of limerence until a relationship wrecked me and I did tons of research to figure what the heck actually transpired. I'm all too familiar with the soul crushing guilt that comes with not doing something as inconsequential as not sending a text back right away lol.

she often misunderstood things when i try to explain

Maybe but you'll never know if she does understand but is just playing dumb and that is a possibility. As the limerent you're likely viewing her with a halo she doesn't possess. If you find yourself having to explain what common decency is to a grown adult, know you are dealing with a player.

But the thing is i deeply care about her the only thing i hate is the way she treats me.

What is there even real about this scenario? Some breadcrumbs of attention? Does her bf know about you? Do you do things together? Have you ever moved in for a kiss? What is the basis for "deeply caring"?

But when she's inconsistent it increases my suicidal thoughts.

Look up "intermittent reinforcement" as it pertains to emotional abuse and limerent relationships. To the average normie, saying that someone inconsistently communicating with you increases your suicidal thoughts sounds batshit crazy. The truth is that it wrecks your nervous system to go through all the highs and lows. Intermittent reinforcement is a researched and proven mental torture technique to keep the target unstable.

Your present advantage is that you are knowledgeable about your own limerent tendencies. That is your armor for now. You just need your behavior to follow which may seem hard since by behavior it means no contact which is mostly a non-behavior and feels counter-intuitive.

The other part is healing your core issues so you don't keep falling for these types. A heathy male would give this person zero second thought. For a limerent I know that may sound practically abusive but it's not. For those without heathy self-esteem, confidence and assertiveness is often seen as aggressive but it isn't. It's likely she has a harem of orbiters willing to be her emotional support human and she'll be fine.

I have faith you know what to do and are able to do it but if you stumble along the way we're here.

 

[Sadmonster98]

I commend you for your bravery and openness for posting this. I never heard of limerence until a relationship wrecked me and I did tons of research to figure what the heck actually transpired. I'm all too familiar with the soul crushing guilt that comes with not doing something as inconsequential as not sending a text back right away lol.

Thank you so much for understanding my situation

Maybe but you'll never know if she does understand but is just playing dumb and that is a possibility. As the limerent you're likely viewing her with a halo she doesn't possess. If you find yourself having to explain what common decency is to a grown adult, know you are dealing with a player.

Tbh a friend of mine also said she's a player who only uses you for her trauma dumping

What is there even real about this scenario? Some breadcrumbs of attention? Does her bf know about you? Do you do things together? Have you ever moved in for a kiss? What is the basis for "deeply caring"?

Yes, she already told her bf about me. She also told her bf about me that i'm her good friend and i do understand her which makes things easier for her.
I need to be honest with you it's mostly long distance relationship. She planned to move to my city 3 times but cancelled at the end moment, 1st time she was unsure, 2nd time due to family emergency and 3rd time she wanted to disappear around her birthday but then her boyfriend planned birthday party for her that's why she was worried that they may get worried if she runs away around her birthday.
Most of our interaction are online basis.

Look up "intermittent reinforcement" as it pertains to emotional abuse and limerent relationships. To the average normie, saying that someone inconsistently communicating with you increases your suicidal thoughts sounds batshit crazy. The truth is that it wrecks your nervous system to go through all the highs and lows. Intermittent reinforcement is a researched and proven mental torture technique to keep the target unstable.

Your present advantage is that you are knowledgeable about your own limerent tendencies. That is your armor for now. You just need your behavior to follow which may seem hard since by behavior it means no contact which is mostly a non-behavior and feels counter-intuitive.

The other part is healing your core issues so you don't keep falling for these types. A heathy male would give this person zero second thought. For a limerent I know that may sound practically abusive but it's not. For those without heathy self-esteem, confidence and assertiveness is often seen as aggressive but it isn't. It's likely she has a harem of orbiters willing to be her emotional support human and she'll be fine.

I have faith you know what to do and are able to do it but if you stumble along the way we're here.

Tbh she's not my first limerant object. I also fell for a girl in 2020 but my limerance didn't lasted long as i got a caring and supportive gf but everything changed after she left in 2023, i fell for another girl in the next 6 month who was my relative living outside the country who returned to pursue her higher education and she showed great interest in me and all but i knew it wasn't right as she was my relative, on her part she got busy with college and we stopped interacting altogether then i met this girl in 2024 and started feeling the same since the first week. She showed great interest and everything and all since the beginning.
To get out of all this mess i started dating a girl and condition improved for a while even though that girl was inconsistent too and not commiting and at that same time this limerant girl asked me out of the blue do i still like her and would i date her if she asked me out? I told her i need to know her better then she said maybe we can know each other now. At that time she was consistent for a while
It created confusion in my mind as the girl i was dating was getting inconsistent day by day and she wasn't committing to anything at all.
And the girl i'm dating is so clumsy even though there's no physical intimacy between us. She just gets angry when i'm late to her replies and we fight a lot consistently making me feel i'm using her but she cares about me too. Constantly checks on me. You can say this girl is complete opposite of my limerant object.
My friends says that i'm way out of her league of the girl i'm dating that's why she's afraid i might leave her.
I'm someone who doesn't want to hurt anyone that's why i'm staying with this girl.
You can understand how fucked up the situation is.
Thank you so much. I told you everything because you seemed interested in helping me solve my dilemma.
I really appreciate how you're being so helpful to me even though i'm just a stranger
I met the best people here
Thanks a lot, i'd love to hear your response

 

[Kali_Yuga13]

also fell for a girl in 2020

When did you earn of limerence and ascribe it to yourself? Self taught or through a therapist or something?

she showed great interest in me

She showed great interest and everything and all since the beginning.

In addition to limerence, do you know about the dynamics of narcissistic abuse cycles? Without knowing the exact details of what 'showing great interest' means to you it's hard to say but it would be good to familiarize yourself with the concept of 'love bombing'.

I really appreciate how you're being so helpful to me even though i'm just a stranger

When I first learned about narcissism it explained so much about my life. I devoured books, youtube channels, blogs and reddit subs. I can and have run circles around therapists on the subject tbh. I believe limerence is a fawn trauma response similar to BPD's having a "favorite person".

I don't typically go around offering people advice as I don't want to step into a savior role or anything. But since you already have insight about what you're dealing with, it makes it easier to help. I wish this knowledge was as prolific as it is now when I was younger as I spent some of my best years heart broken over people form whom things would've never worked in retrospect and have little to show for it. As for me, I now my limerence came from my father's parenting style which feels totally icky when dealing with women. I have the hang-ups of someone that was sexually abused eventhough I wasn't, it was all mental.

I have a low opinion of people that go through the word exploiting other people's trauma so if my words can help someone starve an emotional vampire, all the better.

Another insight I've had has to do with the sociological aspect and what I call the "arena" or battlefield. Right now the prevailing social context (arena) for dating is secular culture. That means dating apps, random hook ups, one night stands, situationships and serial monogamy are normalized as healthy behavior. It's a super competitive battleground that feels like an ongoing job interview and a survivor reality tv show. This doesn't lend to "consistency" in any way, shape or form. Some people thrive on that but not me.

I always thought something was wrong with me for not liking the concept of dating. In retrospect, I would have fared much better seeking courtship for marriage in an environment where women also value that such as a church (as silly as that may sound to an atheist or secularist).

The thing with a limerent and their object is that it feels so "right" at the beginning. Almost like a missing puzzle piece. It makes the difficulties seem worth the effort. "If only they'd do XYZ everything would be perfect" but that day never comes. For a limerent, a heathy person is overlooked as uninteresting as they lack those initial sparks. But I've come to learn that it's the limerent condition itself that needs to be corrected to a certain degree in order to not be blinded.

Since you said this current woman is long distance, the best book I've read on how toxic people communicate over digital media such as text or email is Psychopath Free by Jackson MacKenzie. I felt like he must have been over my shoulder reading my text messages when writing it.

 

[dyingslowly]

I have a friend for whom i've developed feelings limerance in fact, i've discussed it in my previous posts also. She blocked me when i disclosed my feelings but later started talking again when i get better at managing limerance. She told me she cherishes our friendship. I told her about my limerance too.
She was inconsistent in friendship but appreciate how i help her during her tough times, she's a trauma survivor whenever she feels down or suicidal it's me she relies on and after her condition improves she disappears.
4-5 months ago she started being consistent and asked me if i still likes her to which i said i don't know and then she asked me would you date me if i asked you out to which i said maybe we should know each other better. Then i thought maybe maybe everything is falling in place but then she disappeared again. 2 months ago i got to know she got a bf, i felt bad but i was also relieved maybe she won't rely on me much and maybe i can fully get over my limerance with no contact. But these days it's she who starts texting and i can't stop the urge to ignore her. Even this week she talked to me when she was feeling suicidal then disappeared for the next 2-3 days, i kept texting her whether she was okay or not. She replied yesterday that she was okay just too drained to reply me back. Guys this has been her whole pattern everytime she feels suicidal.
I've been suicidal for years and i knew the feelings that's why i'm always available for her but my main dilema is it keeps my limerance alive by being in contact with her. Whenever I don't text her or she's late to reply my texts i stalk her social media to check whether she's okay or not and i keep on repeating it again and again. I've heard cutting off all contacts with limerance object is the only way you can get through it but there's dilemma in me disappearing from her life as she've always talked about i'm the only one she can rely on during her tough times.
My friends told me she's being selfish and you should be too.
But talking to her makes me feel alive again and when she's being consistent i'm out of this world, i'm no more seeking any relationship from her in return and don't want her to like me back.
But when she's inconsistent it increases my suicidal thoughts.
What should i do? Honest answer please?

Your d-mb ass told her the worst thing possible, I had a very similar situation; trust me the abuse won't go away. She 100pc knows this and is using YOU. She loves to take advantage by telling you that she is feeling suicidal. Suicidal people aren't going around making relationships and being a social butterfly. The amount of women I spoke with online almost all of them were faking being suicidal and wanted me to off myself since they knew after emotional and verbal abuse as a man I am more prone to actually doing it. She is making you dependent on her to control your suicidal thoughts and will someday she will drop connection so hard with you that she will expect you to do her the favor and off yourself; that's her goal. Btw I have a very easy solution for this all crap; get an appointment with a mental health professional ask them escitalopram 5 mg dose and xanax 0.5mg dose take these for a month (xanax when you are feeling crippling anxiety). Trust me you will loose sex appeal towards the opposite gender and any attachment and most importantly suicidal thoughts. That person will become an after thought, Tell her that you are going on a journey and will contact her again when the Universe will allow you to [women like these believe in stupid sht most of the time] (this will make her sure that you are nearing that stage meaning she will be happy); cut her off best if get a job move to a different state, place out of her saga.

 

[Kali_Yuga13]

...and wanted me to off myself since they knew after emotional and verbal abuse as a man I am more prone to actually doing it. She is making you dependent on her to control your suicidal thoughts and will someday she will drop connection so hard with you that she will expect you to do her the favor and off yourself; that's her goal.

Most people cannot reconcile their sweet object of affection as a vector of an evil and murderous heart. But it's true. I knew one girl, she strung my neighbor along, used him for a place to live etc until she dropped him. He bounced back thankfully after moving out of state. She went on to get an "abusive" boyfriend and use another friend as her shoulder to cry on. It was clear he wanted more. He also worked for that same boyfriend. The guy killed himself and I'm pretty sure it was over her. She was on facebook for weeks gushing about what a great "friend" he was blah blah blah making his death all about her to cringe worthy levels clearly reveling in self importance at having a man die over her. Many such cases.

 

[Sadmonster98]

When did you earn of limerence and ascribe it to yourself? Self taught or through a therapist or something?

I learnt it around 8 months ago after watching videos of few psychologists and analysing my behaviour pattern since the 2020.

In addition to limerence, do you know about the dynamics of narcissistic abuse cycles? Without knowing the exact details of what 'showing great interest' means to you it's hard to say but it would be good to familiarize yourself with the concept of 'love bombing'.

Yeah i know about the narcissistic abuse. In fact she talks about narcissistic abuse a lot. She told me her ex boyfriend was narcissistic. In fact she's a psychologist herself although not practicing. I wonder sometimes maybe she's using all her knowledge to exploit others

When I first learned about narcissism it explained so much about my life. I devoured books, youtube channels, blogs and reddit subs. I can and have run circles around therapists on the subject tbh. I believe limerence is a fawn trauma response similar to BPD's having a "favorite person".

I don't typically go around offering people advice as I don't want to step into a savior role or anything. But since you already have insight about what you're dealing with, it makes it easier to help. I wish this knowledge was as prolific as it is now when I was younger as I spent some of my best years heart broken over people form whom things would've never worked in retrospect and have little to show for it. As for me, I now my limerence came from my father's parenting style which feels totally icky when dealing with women. I have the hang-ups of someone that was sexually abused eventhough I wasn't, it was all mental.

I have a low opinion of people that go through the word exploiting other people's trauma so if my words can help someone starve an emotional vampire, all the better.

Another insight I've had has to do with the sociological aspect and what I call the "arena" or battlefield. Right now the prevailing social context (arena) for dating is secular culture. That means dating apps, random hook ups, one night stands, situationships and serial monogamy are normalized as healthy behavior. It's a super competitive battleground that feels like an ongoing job interview and a survivor reality tv show. This doesn't lend to "consistency" in any way, shape or form. Some people thrive on that but not me.

I always thought something was wrong with me for not liking the concept of dating. In retrospect, I would have fared much better seeking courtship for marriage in an environment where women also value that such as a church (as silly as that may sound to an atheist or secularist).

The thing with a limerent and their object is that it feels so "right" at the beginning. Almost like a missing puzzle piece. It makes the difficulties seem worth the effort. "If only they'd do XYZ everything would be perfect" but that day never comes. For a limerent, a heathy person is overlooked as uninteresting as they lack those initial sparks. But I've come to learn that it's the limerent condition itself that needs to be corrected to a certain degree in order to not be blinded.

Since you said this current woman is long distance, the best book I've read on how toxic people communicate over digital media such as text or email is Psychopath Free by Jackson MacKenzie. I felt like he must have been over my shoulder reading my text messages when writing it.

Thank you so much for sharing your story. It's really heart breaking to hear what you went through. I loved your suggestions and insights. I'm in fact lucky to have all the knowledge and resources that wasn't available to you at that time. I really appreciate you explaining everything in great detail.
I will try to follow your advice.

Your d-mb ass told her the worst thing possible, I had a very similar situation; trust me the abuse won't go away. She 100pc knows this and is using YOU. She loves to take advantage by telling you that she is feeling suicidal. Suicidal people aren't going around making relationships and being a social butterfly. The amount of women I spoke with online almost all of them were faking being suicidal and wanted me to off myself since they knew after emotional and verbal abuse as a man I am more prone to actually doing it. She is making you dependent on her to control your suicidal thoughts and will someday she will drop connection so hard with you that she will expect you to do her the favor and off yourself; that's her goal. Btw I have a very easy solution for this all crap; get an appointment with a mental health professional ask them escitalopram 5 mg dose and xanax 0.5mg dose take these for a month (xanax when you are feeling crippling anxiety). Trust me you will loose sex appeal towards the opposite gender and any attachment and most importantly suicidal thoughts. That person will become an after thought, Tell her that you are going on a journey and will contact her again when the Universe will allow you to [women like these believe in stupid sht most of the time] (this will make her sure that you are nearing that stage meaning she will be happy); cut her off best if get a job move to a different state, place out of her saga.

Thank you so much for your kind advice. I'm really sorry for what women in your life made you go through.
My friend also said the exact same thing about that girl but i didn't believed him cuz he's bit too conservative and narrow minded, i think your insight can be helpful to me.
I'm taking Xanax 0.5 mg to 1 mg to fall asleep. Honestly I can't afford an appointment of a professional.
The best thing is she's living in different city and i've applied for jobs maybe in a month or two i might get a job then change my number and cutoff her off
and then seek some professional help too.
Thanks

Your d-mb ass told her the worst thing possible, I had a very similar situation; trust me the abuse won't go away. She 100pc knows this and is using YOU. She loves to take advantage by telling you that she is feeling suicidal. Suicidal people aren't going around making relationships and being a social butterfly. The amount of women I spoke with online almost all of them were faking being suicidal and wanted me to off myself since they knew after emotional and verbal abuse as a man I am more prone to actually doing it. She is making you dependent on her to control your suicidal thoughts and will someday she will drop connection so hard with you that she will expect you to do her the favor and off yourself; that's her goal. Btw I have a very easy solution for this all crap; get an appointment with a mental health professional ask them escitalopram 5 mg dose and xanax 0.5mg dose take these for a month (xanax when you are feeling crippling anxiety). Trust me you will loose sex appeal towards the opposite gender and any attachment and most importantly suicidal thoughts. That person will become an after thought, Tell her that you are going on a journey and will contact her again when the Universe will allow you to [women like these believe in stupid sht most of the time] (this will make her sure that you are nearing that stage meaning she will be happy); cut her off best if get a job move to a different state, place out of her saga.

Thank you so much for your kind advice. I'm really sorry for what women in your life made you go through.
My friend also said the exact same thing about that girl but i didn't believed him cuz he's bit too conservative and narrow minded, i think your insight can be helpful to me.
I'm taking Xanax 0.5 mg to 1 mg to fall asleep. Honestly I can't afford an appointment of a professional.
The best thing is she's living in different city and i've applied for jobs maybe in a month or two i might get a job then change my number and cutoff her off
and then seek some professional help too.
Thanks

Most people cannot reconcile their sweet object of affection as a vector of an evil and murderous heart. But it's true. I knew one girl, she strung my neighbor along, used him for a place to live etc until she dropped him. He bounced back thankfully after moving out of state. She went on to get an "abusive" boyfriend and use another friend as her shoulder to cry on. It was clear he wanted more. He also worked for that same boyfriend. The guy killed himself and I'm pretty sure it was over her. She was on facebook for weeks gushing about what a great "friend" he was blah blah blah making his death all about her to cringe worthy levels clearly reveling in self importance at having a man die over her. Many such cases.

I hate how often kind and good hearted people are abused until their breaking point. This world is so cruel to naives.

 

[dyingslowly]

Most people cannot reconcile their sweet object of affection as a vector of an evil and murderous heart. But it's true. I knew one girl, she strung my neighbor along, used him for a place to live etc until she dropped him. He bounced back thankfully after moving out of state. She went on to get an "abusive" boyfriend and use another friend as her shoulder to cry on. It was clear he wanted more. He also worked for that same boyfriend. The guy killed himself and I'm pretty sure it was over her. She was on facebook for weeks gushing about what a great "friend" he was blah blah blah making his death all about her to cringe worthy levels clearly reveling in self importance at having a man die over her. Many such cases.

I agree the only women I have encountered are no less than parasites, similar to this