nootthenoot
Your local cat lover
- Oct 11, 2022
- 50
Huh...this week went by rather quickly. I'm actually excited to ctb tonight. I've lied to the one person who cares about me so they won't worry. I've charged my smartwatch up, and I'm going to set it to go off at the right time. It will rain, but I'm okay with it because I love the rain. Only other thing I'm worried about is the cold and the fear of the water. But it's fine, it's what I want. No one in my life really cares enough to help me, but that's okay. I'm lonely and it's not like my current situation will help that. I want to ctb, I want to end this misery. I sure as hell hope I don't chicken out. I have so many emotions going on inside of me. Excited, upset, determined, afraid...It's so surreal. I'm going to leave...I'm going to be free. I've tried everything possible to help but it isn't working. This is my last hope. Whenever I reach out to professionals or go to the hospital, they turn me away as if I'm just overreacting. Whenever I tell my parents theg just scream at me. My friends see this as a joke, and I have no where to turn to at this point. Yesterday was the most miserable moment of my life, cause it felt that no one took me seriously. I'm done with feeling this way. Everything is set into motion, and no one can ever stop me. I hope I don't postpone this or get caught. Please wish me luck on this.
