Venting i’ve made up my mind

[bae]

i'm either going to ctb by poison or od or fentanyl. or try all the drugs that i want. i've had enough. if i don't get any sort of job opportunity out of this meeting that i have today, then i quit. i fucking quit. i'll spend the next two months prepping for my funeral/cremation or some shit. or throwing my life away. because i'm tired. i'm fucking tired of this.

i'm tired of waiting for something that won't change. My life will never fucking change.

i don't want to settle down. i just want to die. and that's how my life has always been. i'm 20. i don't have a job. i don't want a job. i just quit therapy. she was pissing me off. and now i don't have anything. to do.

i don't wanna go to school anymore. i have a class that starts september 24. but fuck that. honestly i could barely even do it. then i have some university im supposed to visit on saturday. but if this doesn't go through, then i will simply kill myself in the long run. because i'm done. i don't want to do anything except drugs. if i don't get what i want i will fucking kill myself.

it's either that or im going to go down a very, very dark path, one where you all will likely never hear from me again. where i won't die but it won't be pretty. or i die. i don't know. i don't feel anything. i don't want anything except for drugs
it's a miserable existence living like this. i just want to die. but i cant. because i just want. i wanna pop percs n shit that's literally it i'm so bored

 

[darksoul999]

Fentanyl is the way i plan to go and its super peaceful. sorry things are not working out for you man. wish you the best of luck and peace.

I plan to CTB this friday. I am 26.

and yea, fuck wage slavery.

BTW, percs was my thing too. Love me a perc lol...

 

[Somewhat Suicidal]

Please don't try all the drugs you want without researching potential potentialisation and interactions.
You might end up with some horrible shit like serotonin syndrome (any of the group of Amphetamins incl. MDMA + monoamine oxidase inhibitors) or worse
Ketamine and alcohol also has some nasty interaction that won't kill you but you will feel like utter shit and you certainly will wish you were dead.

a good resource to check for interactions is http://www.erowid.org

In case you want to do Fent, Benzos are a good option to combine.

Anyway, please do your research and maybe think through before you do anything you might regret after all.

Be safe and best of luck whatever you decide