suicidalenby
waiting for the bus
- Feb 25, 2023
- 26
i have to wait so long to ctb. ive been waiting so long, bolted onto this roller coaster and i want off. but i have a job now so my plan is put into motion.
first steps are to save up enough to pay my roommate back for covering my rent. shes gotta get a surgery and shes been paying my rent while im unemployed. if i ctb now without saving up itd screw her over completely. i owe her 2000.
i also have to save up for my cremation, which just the cremation will be about 1500. if family and friends want a ceremony they can pay for it themselves, but im gonna at least cover the cremation. (they better not make it fucking religious, no shade to any religious people but i fucking cant.)
ill save up for the items i need, and do more research on my method of choice. im going to do carotid artery asphyxiation of some sort.
the total amount im going to need is around $3500, and saving that much with the income this job will get me will take about 5 months, give or take.
so, for the day. five months from now is april. may might be a better time to do it, simply because ill be certain to have the money by then. (fuck, everything in this damn fucked up world runs on money.)
if at all possible to pay off what i owe sooner than april, i will take agency to accelerate my plans.
something i still need to do is decide if and how i'm going to write and distribute my ctb notes. theres still a lot of loose ends, but i have time.
first steps are to save up enough to pay my roommate back for covering my rent. shes gotta get a surgery and shes been paying my rent while im unemployed. if i ctb now without saving up itd screw her over completely. i owe her 2000.
i also have to save up for my cremation, which just the cremation will be about 1500. if family and friends want a ceremony they can pay for it themselves, but im gonna at least cover the cremation. (they better not make it fucking religious, no shade to any religious people but i fucking cant.)
ill save up for the items i need, and do more research on my method of choice. im going to do carotid artery asphyxiation of some sort.
the total amount im going to need is around $3500, and saving that much with the income this job will get me will take about 5 months, give or take.
so, for the day. five months from now is april. may might be a better time to do it, simply because ill be certain to have the money by then. (fuck, everything in this damn fucked up world runs on money.)
if at all possible to pay off what i owe sooner than april, i will take agency to accelerate my plans.
something i still need to do is decide if and how i'm going to write and distribute my ctb notes. theres still a lot of loose ends, but i have time.
