Unattainable666
Enlightened
- Mar 31, 2023
- 1,346
I want to tell you a story. A very sad story that I've not told many people. It's the story of how my little girl was killed. Why I'm now off the hinge and why I'm going to do what I need to do to vindicate all of the good and kind people who have suffered at the hand of big corporations and hateful people. Chris was 12. She looked older and acted older. Her friends were a bit older. On a cold morning in October 1989, Chris was getting ready for school. I was running late for work and had to drop her little brother off at day care. I was in such a hurry I screamed down the hall Bye Chris see you later. After I dropped her brother off at daycare I thought to myself I didn;t give Chris a hug and kiss for the day so I went back home. I walked in the door and she was surprised to see me (I can still see her face). I apologized and told her I needed a kiss and hug for the day. So we kissed and hugged and I went off to work and Chris went off to school - or so I thought. She left me a note it said that she was sorry she didnt go to school but was skipping to go shopping with her friends. She asked me not to be mad at her, that she loved me and would be back by the time I got off work. I got home and she never showed up. About 9 pm there was a knock at the door. Two sheriffs stood there and asked to come in. I asked if Chris was hurt they said no. I asked if she was in trouble they said no. I said I didnt understand. They said, your daughter is dead. I didnt understand why they would lie to me. She wasnt dead she was hurt or in trouble. I immediately disassociated from myself. 30 some odd years later I am still disassociated. I met with the coroner the next day She told me the girls told her that they gave Christina some kind of drug and that she started having convusions. There were 5 other prople present (two guys ages 18 and 21; two teenage girls and Chris' step-father who I found out later had been screwing one of the 15 year old girls). Once Chris started convulsing they all got "bored" and they all left her in the motel room while she had seizures. No one called 911; no one called for help. They discarded her as if she were nothing. By the time they all got back she was dead. She died alone. My baby girl was gone. If someone had called 911 she would be here today. The coroner felt sorry for the girls. the sheriff couldn't find the two adult guys (they lived across the street from me) and I never knew her step-father was there until years later when I received a letter from one of the girls. No one was held accountable. These people went on to live their lives while my little girl was lowered into a cold hole in the ground. I've hated those people but tried to move on.
These feelings of being abused and feeling as if I don't matter as a human are back in full force. Now I'm going to ctb but it will be different this time. I will not go alone.
If you have anything negative to say dont reply it will only piss me off and at this point in time I'm unhinged and don't need any more pushing me over the edge.
For Christina and for me - suffering for those who destroyed us.
These feelings of being abused and feeling as if I don't matter as a human are back in full force. Now I'm going to ctb but it will be different this time. I will not go alone.
If you have anything negative to say dont reply it will only piss me off and at this point in time I'm unhinged and don't need any more pushing me over the edge.
For Christina and for me - suffering for those who destroyed us.
i cant possibly relate but my god your feelings are SO valid. i hope you find peace no matter what decisions you make 
