Angel_of_nostalgia
Member
- Jan 25, 2023
- 5
It feels like i'm going crazy. I think this is the most depressed I've felt so far. For the past few days I have just been drinking, cutting, sleeping, and taking pills to stay asleep. I barely made it through work today. Called outta work a couple of days ago because someone in my family got scratched by my cat and threatened to kill her. I had a breakdown and knew I could not make it a full shift at work. I was already feeling really depressed before that but I think that's what sent me into a bad spiral. I know now he didn't mean it, but I know there are fucked up people in this world who would actually do that so I believed he would. I hate how fucked this world is. I am trying so hard to stay alive because I have a family and animals to take care of. I can't just leave them. I'm going to make an appointment with a therapist tomorrow, but I'm scared. Idk what all I should tell them, I don't want to be hospitalized or something. I really want to die though. It's so hard. Even though my life isn't terrible and other people have it way worse. It's just so exhausting to live. Sorry, this is all over the place if anyone even reads this. I just needed to let it all out and this is the safest space for me to do so. I love you guys... hope you are doing okay <3