It is sad how this website is not comforting anymore.

[rationaltake]

Either make it a forum that respects invalidating statements from either side, or a forum that doesn't tolerate invalidating statements from either side.

You haven't mentioned the option of a forum that respects invalidating statements from one side but doesn't tolerate invalidating statements from the other side.

This option could be seen as a form of positive discrimination. A reverse mirror of the rest of the world.

 

[9BBN]

You haven't mentioned the option of a forum that respects invalidating statements from one side but doesn't tolerate invalidating statements from the other side.

This option could be seen as a form of positive discrimination. A reverse mirror of the rest of the world.

Right, what I'm saying is that's how it is now, and it's discrimination, hence not pro-choice. A reverse mirror of a pro-life world would actually be pro-death, not "a form of positive discrimination" that gets to call itself pro-choice. In order for this forum to be pro-choice, it can't censor pro-life rhetoric and promote pro-death rhetoric. It has to invite both or leave out both.
As far as I'm concerned, Rain's last reply is attacking a strawman, since they're arguing as if I am talking about FC when I made it clear I'm talking about OceanBlue.
The bottom line: if a forum exclusively lets one side invalidate the other, it is not pro-choice.

 

[the_town_manager]

If this forum has a pro-death bias in being more tolerant of negative pronouncements on the overall worth of life, it still also has a pro-life side to it as well. You can't say "I hope you will kill yourself" in any situation, but you can definitely say "I hope you will continue to live" in plenty of situations. I'm not saying that this is something I have a problem with. It's as it should be. But it's nevertheless an example of a clear pro-life bias. Is this also a problem? Both of these biases make sense to me, and I don't think anything has to be changed about either of them, and neither of them makes this place not pro-choice.

 

[9BBN]

If this forum has a pro-death bias in being more tolerant of negative pronouncements on the overall worth of life, it still also has a pro-life side to it as well. You can't say "I hope you will kill yourself" in any situation, but you can definitely say "I hope you will continue to live" in plenty of situations. I'm not saying that this is something I have a problem with. It's as it should be. But it's nevertheless an example of a clear pro-life bias. Is this also a problem? Both of these biases make sense to me, and I don't think anything has to be changed about either of them, and neither of them makes this place not pro-choice.

First of all, a pro-death bias is not the same as a life-invalidating statement. What I'm confronting is not simply a pro-death bias like "I want to die," or even "I like the idea of death because there is no pain," it's: "It's a fact that if we choose to continue living we are delusional."

Secondly, just because this forum has to exclusively allow life-encouraging does not give it a free pass to exclusively allow life-invalidating. A truly pro-choice forum wouldn't do that.

Lastly, a truly pro-choice forum would not even accept encouragement toward either side (death or life), but instead accept only the empowerment of choosing either side. So yes, to answer your question it is also a problem, because the example you give is not just a "pro-life bias" but actually an encouraging statement.

EDIT: JUST TO BE CLEAR TO THOSE WHO ARE NOT FOLLOWING THIS IS ABOUT OCEANBLUE NOT FUNERALCRY

 

[Feeding Pigeons]

@FuneralCry I hope it wasn't a thread that recently got locked that made you post this. I always thought it was nice having you around this forum, but thats just me.

 

[whatevs]

I get the feeling this place used to be a giant nihilistic circle jerk!

It never stopped being one. Efilists are just butthurt because a few people in the forum are not sure about ending their lives, and can't fathom how calling people that are enjoying themselves delusional is ineffective, since everything we do is for minimizing suffering and feeling content. Normal people are delusional in many ways, but not in the sources of their joy. They have real reasons to enjoy life, go and observe them.

Also I don't respect people like Schopenhauer that speak endlessly about the horrors of existence but never try to leave it, be it by asceticism or more abrupt means (which I understand spiritually shouldn't work, but still). Your actions have to be aligned with your words.

I choose to exist for now but I want to have a choice to end it on my terms and consider suicide one of the most defiant and autonomous action one can take

 

[the_town_manager]

First of all, a pro-death bias is not the same as a life-invalidating statement. What I'm confronting is not simply a pro-death bias like "I want to die," or even "I like the idea of death because there is no pain," it's: "It's a fact that if we choose to continue living we are delusional."

Secondly, just because this forum has to exclusively allow life-encouraging does not give it a free pass to exclusively allow life-invalidating. A truly pro-choice forum wouldn't do that.

Lastly, a truly pro-choice forum would not even accept encouragement toward either side (death or life), but instead accept only the empowerment of choosing either side. So yes, to answer your question it is also a problem, because the example you give is not just a "pro-life bias" but actually an encouraging statement.

EDIT: JUST TO BE CLEAR TO THOSE WHO ARE NOT FOLLOWING THIS IS ABOUT OCEANBLUE NOT FUNERALCRY

So would you take issue with, for example, people congratulating someone on their decision to give life one final shot? There's clearly differences in what level of encouragement or enthusiasm can be shown in reacting to someone's decision to either live or die. That's a bias if you're after completely equal treatment of all choices. Yet I doubt you actually have a problem with it. Similarly, I don't get what the problem is with someone saying that you have to be delusional to want to live either. I don't agree, but it's trivial to just shrug it off in a world where every place but this one has a default pro-life bias. There's zero reason to censor such a fringe opinion. You can obviously call it out if you disagree. But nothing more should be done imo.

 

[Pluto]

It never stopped being one.

There seem to be two interrelated elements to this.

1) While I won't use a trigger word starting with 'a', the bulk of young people were not raised in any substantially religious setting, hence the completely materialistic interpretation of life is all that they would know.

2) There is a strong desire for a confirmation bias in favour of the said philosophy (i.e., no purpose to life, no bigger picture perspective, etc.) given that it would help overcoming SI by providing a tidy world-view that is totally compatible with suicide. This can lead to a somewhat abrasive relationship with those who are actively exploring a greater variety of perspectives.

 

[Pain In The Ass]

It never stopped being one. Efilists are just butthurt because a few people in the forum are not sure about ending their lives, and can't fathom how calling people that are enjoying themselves delusional is ineffective, since everything we do is for minimizing suffering and feeling content. Normal people are delusional in many ways, but not in the sources of their joy. They have real reasons to enjoy life, go and observe them.

Also I don't respect people like Schopenhauer that speak endlessly about the horrors of existence but never try to leave it, be it by asceticism or more abrupt means (which I understand spiritually shouldn't work, but still). Your actions have to be aligned with your words.

I choose to exist for now but I want to have a choice to end it on my terms and consider suicide one of the most defiant and autonomous action one can take

Maybe the forum needs more subforums - those considering, those 100%, those who want to create a 'kit' in case they need it in the future, those who are mentally ill and can't cope with debate, those who aren't who are just here for a debate about life and death - some kind of way we can avoid the people we have conflict with

I love Kierkegaard - he hates these people, like Schopenhauer, whose careers consist of establishing and writing about their philosophy all day long, but never actually live it out in any way

personally, I love life at times, I generally like it more often than not, and hate it every so often, usually whilst dealing with the consequences of doing one of those things I know I shouldn't do, but did anyway! Right now I'm in pain, but it's the pain I hate, not life - I'm devastated because I don't actually want to die.

 

[whatevs]

Maybe the forum needs more subforums - those considering, those 100%, those who want to create a 'kit' in case they need it in the future, those who are mentally ill and can't cope with debate, those who aren't who are just here for a debate about life and death - some kind of way we can avoid the people we have conflict with

I love Kierkegaard - he hates these people, like Schopenhauer, whose careers consist of establishing and writing about their philosophy all day long, but never actually live it out in any way

personally, I love life at times, I generally like it more often than not, and hate it every so often, usually whilst dealing with the consequences of doing one of those things I know I shouldn't do, but did anyway! Right now I'm in pain, but it's the pain I hate, not life - I'm devastated because I don't actually want to die.

I actually dislike life in an abstract way, it seems like a constant stream of needs, demands, obstacles, urges, fighting, and then the constant threat of horrible physical and psychological pain.

But attending to how my life USED TO BE, I know for a fact it can be enjoyable. I'm just not there anymore, so I ended in this fucking place.

So my position is simply that, on the whole and from outside, life looks like something that only exists for now, it's imperfect and suffering, but many people live this struggling experience and still obtain from it something that makes every day worthwhile. But you can also very easily fall through the cracks of life and end up in the gutter, in sheol, where you can hear the laughter and activity from above but you are stuck in the shadows, stumbling across sharp objects in the darkness and trying to survive drinking fetid water and the spoils that fall from above. You're not delusional and neither are they, you're just experiencing a part of reality they can't and don't want to see.

 

[Pain In The Ass]

I actually dislike life in an abstract way, it seems like a constant stream of needs, demands, obstacles, urges, fighting, and then the constant threat of horrible physical and psychological pain.

But attending to how my life USED TO BE, I know for a fact it can be enjoyable. I'm just not there anymore, so I ended in this fucking place.

So my position is simply that, on the whole and from outside, life looks like something that only exists for now, it's imperfect and suffering, but many people live this struggling experience and still obtain from it something that makes every day worthwhile. But you can also very easily fall through the cracks of life and end up in the gutter, in sheol, where you can hear the laughter and activity from above but you are stuck in the shadows, stumbling across sharp objects in the darkness and trying to survive drinking fetid water and the spoils that fall from above. You're not delusional and neither are they, you're just experiencing a part of reality they can't and don't want to see.

yeah, I do believe that the most sane, rational thing for everyone to do is to kill themselves - why do all this, when it will end, and likely hurt a lot at times throughout?! It makes no sense. But I still knowingly reach for my moment of glory, even that it will only last a short period, and then become a memory. A poster on a wall from the festival I played at 5 years ago. it makes so sense, but i still keep trying, because I'm insane!

 

[Dot]

 

[whatevs]

I think this thread touches upon the most important question in SaSu: when you weigh in everything, is dying preferable to living?

Normally for us this is a personal matter, as I said I've experienced an acceptable life in which suicide wasn't considered, and now that it isn't I feel slowly forced to see it as possible, but it's interesting to discuss what we think about the value of life in absolutes.

 

[Dot]

I think this thread touches upon the most important question in SaSu: when you weigh in everything, is dying preferable to living?

Normally for us this is a personal matter, as I said I've experienced an acceptable life in which suicide wasn't considered, and now that it isn't I feel slowly forced to see it as possible, but it's interesting to discuss what we think about the value of life in absolutes.

Yh thnk = nt abslute qustn
Sme ppl wn2 liv & sme ppl wn2 di
Sme ppl wn2 liv bt bt lfe = 2 dffclt & thy cnsidr c.t.b 2 b only optn evn if thy nt wnt rlly wn2
Evry1 hs thr own exprnces & feelngs of lfe & thy r all as valid as ech-othr i.m.o
No1 = dlusnl eithr wy bcse every1 = livng dffrnt realty 2 evry1 els

 

[whatevs]

Yh thnk = nt abslute qustn
Sme ppl wn2 liv & sme ppl wn2 di
Sme ppl wn2 liv bt bt lfe = 2 dffclt & thy cnsidr c.t.b 2 b only optn evn if thy nt wnt rlly wn2
Evry1 hs thr own exprnces & feelngs of lfe & thy r all as valid as ech-othr i.m.o
No1 = dlusnl eithr wy bcse every1 = livng dffrnt realty 2 evry1 els

I think we all share part of reality though. But when it comes to whether life is worth it or not, I agree that it seems to be a completely subjective and temporary sentiment.

 

[rationaltake]

So my position is simply that, on the whole and from outside, life looks like something that only exists for now, it's imperfect and suffering, but many people live this struggling experience and still obtain from it something that makes every day worthwhile. But you can also very easily fall through the cracks of life and end up in the gutter, in sheol, where you can hear the laughter and activity from above but you are stuck in the shadows, stumbling across sharp objects in the darkness and trying to survive drinking fetid water and the spoils that fall from above. You're not delusional and neither are they, you're just experiencing a part of reality they can't and don't want to see.

Exactly! Brilliant exposition. It was worth coming to this thread just for this.

 

[9BBN]

So would you take issue with, for example, people congratulating someone on their decision to give life one final shot? There's clearly differences in what level of encouragement or enthusiasm can be shown in reacting to someone's decision to either live or die. That's a bias if you're after completely equal treatment of all choices. Yet I doubt you actually have a problem with it.

You still haven't addressed my second point, only my weakest third. I was upfront about acknowledging the fact that this forum can only exclusively allow encouraging life. But I stand by my earlier second point that this is no excuse to exclusively let the pro-death side invalidate the other. Logic like this is arbitrary, and invalidating opinions are stronger than encouraging opinions so it's overkill, perhaps quite literally.

Similarly, I don't get what the problem is with someone saying that you have to be delusional to want to live either. I don't agree, but it's trivial to just shrug it off in a world where every place but this one has a default pro-life bias.

Calling people delusional is invalidating, but congratulating someone on a choice is only encouraging. It's strange that you can't tell the difference between an encouraging opinion and an invalidating opinion, when the first point of your post was that "There's clearly differences in what level of encouragement or enthusiasm can be shown." Also, it's irrelevant that every other place has a default pro-life bias, because this is the place that's claiming to be pro-choice. If this forum wants to call itself pro-choice, it has to act like it, not just point to other places and say, "we get to do this because they do that." A pro-choice cannot exclusively let one side invalidate the other.

There's zero reason to censor such a fringe opinion. You can obviously call it out if you disagree. But nothing more should be done imo.

Calling people delusional for wanting to live is not just a fringe opinion. You are clearly missing the point here. We are discussing whether this forum is an echo chamber by design. The corresponding pro-life statement is censored here.

 

[Al Cappella]

We are discussing whether this forum is an echo chamber by design. The corresponding pro-life statement is censored here.

I absolutely think it is. In fact, I bet I'm not the only one who feels the need to emphasize that I'm resolutely pro-choice, and that people absolutely have the right to terminate their being, before saying that I'm pro-life.

As far as these forums go, there certainly is an editorial slant/bias—but that's understandable, and there's nothing wrong with that. Some do take it to extremes, and become militant about it—that I don't care for.

Lastly, most Internet forums I've seen are echo chambers. They tend to create polarized, entrenched beaking at one another. In fact, if you work at being pragmatic, choosing reasonableness and the middle ground, you can bet no one will read your shit. Say something combative and confrontational, and you've got a thread with 100s of replies.

 

[9BBN]

As far as these forums go, there certainly is an editorial slant/bias—but that's understandable, and there's nothing wrong with that. Some do take it to extremes, and become militant about it—that I don't care for.

Lastly, most Internet forums I've seen are echo chambers. They tend to create polarized, entrenched beaking at one another. In fact, if you work at being pragmatic, choosing reasonableness and the middle ground, you can bet no one will read your shit. Say something combative and confrontational, and you've got a thread with 100s of replies.

Sure, but you get that the stakes are higher here, right? I was hinting at it previously when I called The_town_manager's argument "overkill." Do I need to say it explicitly? This forum has a stronger obligation than others to be even-sided due to the nature of the forum. It also has an obligation to be even-sided in order to legitimately call itself pro-choice.

 

[Al Cappella]

Sure, but you get that the stakes are higher here, right? I was hinting at it previously when I called The_town_manager's argument "overkill." Do I need to say it explicitly? This forum has a stronger obligation than others to be even-sided due to the nature of the forum. It also has an obligation to be even-sided in order to legitimately call itself pro-choice.

Sure. But even so, that doesn't mean it's going to happen, unfortunately.

 

[whatevs]

Sure, but you get that the stakes are higher here, right? I was hinting at it previously when I called The_town_manager's argument "overkill." Do I need to say it explicitly? This forum has a stronger obligation than others to be even-sided due to the nature of the forum. It also has an obligation to be even-sided in order to legitimately call itself pro-choice.

The forum is called 'Sanctioned Suicide' not 'Sanctioned Choice'. I think you demonstrated succinctly that there's a bias in that saying that people wanting to live are delusional is protected but saying that suicidal people are delusional would get you banned.

Having said that, I have seen good advice and encouraging words frequently in the forum, so I wouldn't place in the users any responsibility for what people decide to do. They never get encouraged to take their lives and that sort of thing. People do discuss their methods but is understood they have their mind set.

 

[WorthlessTrash]

Yeah, i have not seen anyone encourage suicide. Quite the opposite in fact where some people seemed (i use this word because i am not100% sure it was the actual intent, but i dont see why certain things would be brought up otherwise) to subtey attempt to change my mind on CTBing, even when I made it clear my mind is made up. If anything, some users actually (unintentionally or intentionally) go against the premis of pro choice on suicide here (when it comes to others).

But i have never seen someone say "yeah you should CTB" or the like.

 

[Al Cappella]

Besides, I'm not going to begrudge a certain amount of bias, given that suicidal people genuinely shitty time of it anywhere else. Being able to talk about it without being shamed or worse does matter. So if someone vents about the world being shit, or whatever else, then have at it. But for me, using pro-lifer as a slur is a bit annoying. No matter, I'll live. Or not…

 

[9BBN]

Sure. But even so, that doesn't mean it's going to happen, unfortunately.

Yeah. Best we can do is stand up to the hypocrisy.

The forum is called 'Sanctioned Suicide' not 'Sanctioned Choice'. I think you demonstrated succinctly that there's a bias in that saying that people wanting to live are delusional is protected but saying that suicidal people are delusional would get you banned.

Thanks. I'm glad I'm understood.

Having said that, I have seen good advice and encouraging words frequently in the forum, so I wouldn't place in the users any responsibility for what people decide to do. They never get encouraged to take their lives and that sort of thing. People do discuss their methods but is understood they have their mind set.

It's definitely not the responsibility of the users, it's how the forum is run. And just because I disagree with some of how this place is run does not mean I don't appreciate most of what it offers. I can't know for sure, but I personally have confidence this place does more good than harm. The real motivation I have for pointing out hypocrisy is not to take the forum down, but to improve it and protect it from its opponents. As it stands, I think pro-lifers have a genuine case that this forum is an echo chamber, and that is not good considering this is a suicide forum that calls itself pro-choice.

 

[jawdropped123]

I think I did write about this months ago, but I feel like this even more now. I think that in the past, a long time ago, being on here did comfort me a bit, even know nothing could possibly ever make me feel better and I will always suffer no matter what. I feel like now, there has been too many pro life, harmful and insulting things on here. The last thing that suicidal people need is being made to feel worse. It is a shame how things turn out like this, but after all life is extremely disappointing. Things only seem to get worse.

I just think that in this world people will always be cruel and that is just the way that people are. At this point, it seems as though there is no peace or comfort in this life, there is only pain, and it is tiring trying to distract myself each day, having to deal with this miserable existence. Sometimes I do envy those who come on here for methods and just go. If euthanasia was legalised then this website would not even need to exist in the first place.

This life is so meaningless and temporary but at the same time so painful. I wish I never felt a need to write about this and I wish that I never felt a need to use the forum, if I was gone from this world I would not have to. I wish that I was gone more than anything, but of course dying is not easy. I envy those who have left this life as they are free from suffering, they do not have to deal with pointless life anymore. Non existence is all that I will ever want.

I think you are an amazing person, your comments are very sweet and i hope i could say the same about others on this platform. Unfortunately i havent been on here for long so i dont know how it was back then. I hope things get better for you because you really deserve it. How old are you? If i may ask.

 

[FuneralCry]

I think you are an amazing person, your comments are very sweet and i hope i could say the same about others on this platform. Unfortunately i havent been on here for long so i dont know how it was back then. I hope things get better for you because you really deserve it. How old are you? If i may ask.

Thank you. You seem very nice. Not all people have been so nice on here in the past but there are many kind people. I'm 21, but I feel like I have been alive for far too long at this point. I wish you the best.

 

[the_town_manager]

Calling people delusional is invalidating, but congratulating someone on a choice is only encouraging.

If this forum wants to call itself pro-choice, it has to act like it, not just point to other places and say, "we get to do this because they do that." A pro-choice cannot exclusively let one side invalidate the other.

And how is encouragement a milder thing than invalidation? It's the other way around, if anything. One is personal and the other is general. My point is that by your standards this place can never be pro-choice because there's forms of pro-life bias that you can't ever reasonably expect to be challenged. Unless you also take issue with that, your call for completely equal treatment rings hollow, and if by your standards it's inevitable that this place can't be pro-choice, the charge that it actually isn't pro-choice loses all its power.

At least that's part of my point. The second part is that just like there's some forms of pro-life bias that are inevitable and that there's no reason to try to root out, there's also forms of pro-death bias that there's no reason to censor here, or that should only be censored in specific circumstances. For example, you obviously shouldn't barge into someone's recovery thread and call them delusional for wanting to live. But expressing such an opinion on your own thread or a thread specifically about the questions of rationality of suicide seems totally fine to me. Context matters. Now that I think about it, I think even the opposite viewpoint should be allowed in such posts, I just don't get why someone who thought suicidal people are delusional would find their way to this website in the first place. But if they were still suicidal or somehow still thought suicide was valid despite it being delusional, I don't think such an opinion should be censored either in the right circumstances.

Or how about the people here that are only selectively pro-choice? The ones that think that you need to reach some specific threshold of age or be in some specific life circumstances before it's valid to commit suicide. You see these opinions around as well. I don't think they're disallowed unless you, again, go barging into someone else's thread and telling them what they should or should not do. Does allowing such opinions to be expressed in some contexts make this place not pro-choice? It obviously doesn't. The overall ethos of this place is clearly pro-choice, and it's a total over-reaction to claim otherwise, for either the people that see this place as too pro-life or too pro-death.

 

[9BBN]

And how is encouragement a milder thing than invalidation? It's the other way around, if anything. One is personal and the other is general. My point is that by your standards this place can never be pro-choice because there's forms of pro-life bias that you can't ever reasonably expect to be challenged. Unless you also take issue with that, your call for completely equal treatment rings hollow, and if by your standards it's inevitable that this place can't be pro-choice, the charge that it actually isn't pro-choice loses all its power.

That's true, and I do take issue with it (I see it as something you can't do much about, but there are mitigating steps), but my point is that's no excuse to exclusively let the pro-death side invalidate the other. I don't think you get to say, "look at this pro-life thing (encouragement) we can't do anything about, this means we get to do this pro-death thing (invalidation) as recompense."

I'm also arguing it's not just recompense, it's overkill. The reason invalidation is worse than encouragement is because of the subtext that this forum is an echo chamber. Invalidation creates an echo chamber, whereas encouragement can merely rail against it. And if the invalidation is strong enough, it tunes out not just encouragement but also reason. Call people delusional and nobody will listen to anything they say. Encouragement doesn't do that. Encouragement still compromises free choice, but it doesn't go that far.

Now that I think about it, I think even the opposite viewpoint should be allowed in such posts, I just don't get why someone who thought suicidal people are delusional would find their way to this website in the first place.

What's problematic is that you're talking about this like it's just a "viewpoint." Invalidation goes beyond a viewpoint; it's insisting someone else's reality. There's a reason calling suicidal people delusional is invalidating, not just a "viewpoint:" it literally negates the other person's autonomy and denies their reality. That is different from expressing a "viewpoint," which is merely expressing the perception of a different reality, not also insisting it on others.

A simple example of the contrast might be, "I don't see it that way" or even "nobody else sees it that way," versus, "you are deluded." Maybe it would be helpful to remind you this all started with an OceanBlue post that Rain 'Liked' that said this: "It's a fact that if we choose to continue living we are delusional."

Or how about the people here that are only selectively pro-choice? The ones that think that you need to reach some specific threshold of age or be in some specific life circumstances before it's valid to commit suicide. You see these opinions around as well. I don't think they're disallowed unless you, again, go barging into someone else's thread and telling them what they should or should not do. Does allowing such opinions to be expressed in some contexts make this place not pro-choice? It obviously doesn't. The overall ethos of this place is clearly pro-choice, and it's a total over-reaction to claim otherwise, for either the people that see this place as too pro-life or too pro-death.

Again, what you're missing is the distinction between an opinion and an invalidating statement. I have no problems with opinions. I do think invalidation should be disallowed even from selectively pro-choicers.

 

[rationaltake]

I just don't get why someone who thought suicidal people are delusional would find their way to this website in the first place.

I can understand your point.

Although Buddhists don't condemn suicide across the board they consider that it is delusional to resort to suicide as an escape from suffering. They believe that the suffering will continue in the next life and the real solution is to deal with the suffering in this life.

Someone who subscribes to this belief could nevertheless find their life so unbearable that they are contemplating suicide.

I'm not playing Devil's advocate btw.

 

[whatevs]

I can understand your point.

Although Buddhists don't condemn suicide across the board they consider that it is delusional to resort to suicide as an escape from suffering. They believe that the suffering will continue in the next life and the real solution is to deal with the suffering in this life.

Someone who subscribes to this belief could nevertheless find their life so unbearable that they are contemplating suicide.

I'm not playing Devil's advocate btw.

This is basically my position. I know in my bones killing myself would be a spiritual failure but it would even worse to never advance spiritually and have to live a life of resentment, frustration and boredom. So I either get out of this rut or I will end it. I don't want to live as someone that proclaims the world is in the wrong but cannot produce goodness.