Zer0
Nem sempre se pode ser Deus
- Sep 14, 2018
- 127
Recently I broke up a 3 year old relationship with a woman, we had an open relationship and everything was perfect for 2 year, we had dates with other people (both individually and as a couple), usually it was fine.
Last year she started seeing someone an it was ok at first, we talked about it as usual and everything was fine, but the guy started showing signs he was competing with me for her, that was uncomfortable but since our only connection was the girl, we didn't interacted with each other and I could just not care about him. Problems started when she was caring less about me day by day, when I visited her she just scrolled instagram in 100% of her free time. At first I tried to improve, in my mind she was just tired of her college classes and didn't have energy left by the end of the day.
In April of this year I started treatment for anxiety, the meds fucked me up and I isolated myself a lot. She accused me of not caring about her anymore and we daily fights that always ended in "there is nothing to do". I stopped my treatment (not because of her) and things kinda got better, but we got back to the point where we just were together but didn't enjoy each other, both of us promising to try to rebuild the relationship.
I finally had the balls to break up with her last month, she took it really bad but accepted it in the and, since I didn't asked her if we should break up, I informed her that it was what I wanted.
That was the context.
It was sad to break up but it actually made me feel better, things were pretty bad in the last month of our relationship and giving it a proper closure was the only thing I did right in my life. Of course I still miss her, she was one of the most important person in my life, but I'm dealing with it pretty good, I'm even proud of myself.
I haven't talked much to her, she sent me some stuff on instagram and I responded, it didn't made me feel bad. Today something different happened, she posted a picture of herself on instagram and it made me miss her but it was ok, I'm dealing with that, but in the comments was the guy she is dating giving her compliments and stuff like that. I went furious out of nowhere, I didn't feel that bad in months, but the weird part is that it was because of him, not her. I've seen pictures of her with other guys after we broke up, I felt kinda bad but moved on, but I can't stand him, I just want to tore him to pieces.
What annoys me the most is how stupid that is, I could understand if I felt bad about her being with other people, but I only feel bad about her being with him.
To make it clear: I don't want to get back with her, the way she treated me during my treatment and during our last month together made me resent her, I don't feel about her like I did in the beginning, I still "talk" to her because I'm trying to deal with the breakup the way I thing is right, she is not my enemy, she is a good person that made mistakes, we are both adults and should be able to deal with it like adults.
Last year she started seeing someone an it was ok at first, we talked about it as usual and everything was fine, but the guy started showing signs he was competing with me for her, that was uncomfortable but since our only connection was the girl, we didn't interacted with each other and I could just not care about him. Problems started when she was caring less about me day by day, when I visited her she just scrolled instagram in 100% of her free time. At first I tried to improve, in my mind she was just tired of her college classes and didn't have energy left by the end of the day.
In April of this year I started treatment for anxiety, the meds fucked me up and I isolated myself a lot. She accused me of not caring about her anymore and we daily fights that always ended in "there is nothing to do". I stopped my treatment (not because of her) and things kinda got better, but we got back to the point where we just were together but didn't enjoy each other, both of us promising to try to rebuild the relationship.
I finally had the balls to break up with her last month, she took it really bad but accepted it in the and, since I didn't asked her if we should break up, I informed her that it was what I wanted.
That was the context.
It was sad to break up but it actually made me feel better, things were pretty bad in the last month of our relationship and giving it a proper closure was the only thing I did right in my life. Of course I still miss her, she was one of the most important person in my life, but I'm dealing with it pretty good, I'm even proud of myself.
I haven't talked much to her, she sent me some stuff on instagram and I responded, it didn't made me feel bad. Today something different happened, she posted a picture of herself on instagram and it made me miss her but it was ok, I'm dealing with that, but in the comments was the guy she is dating giving her compliments and stuff like that. I went furious out of nowhere, I didn't feel that bad in months, but the weird part is that it was because of him, not her. I've seen pictures of her with other guys after we broke up, I felt kinda bad but moved on, but I can't stand him, I just want to tore him to pieces.
What annoys me the most is how stupid that is, I could understand if I felt bad about her being with other people, but I only feel bad about her being with him.
To make it clear: I don't want to get back with her, the way she treated me during my treatment and during our last month together made me resent her, I don't feel about her like I did in the beginning, I still "talk" to her because I'm trying to deal with the breakup the way I thing is right, she is not my enemy, she is a good person that made mistakes, we are both adults and should be able to deal with it like adults.