Is that Beethoven I can hear?

[BipolarGuy]

I have no idea how that stuff works. There was another user here who helped him with it, I'll try and dig around and see if i can establish who that was.

But ya Letzte was a total character throughout the whole thing. Gave a cheers to camera before he drank it like a whisky, sat back against the wall and lit a cigarette like he didn't give a single fuck what was happening.

Thank you.
Presumably I could just use my laptop webcam.
I wouldn't know how to set it up.
Presumably a discord room would be used?

BipolarGuy, I'm bipolar too. I get the impression that you're having a depressive episode now. If so, are you sure you want to go when you're not fully in your right mind? I mean, it is an important decision, arguably the most important one you'll ever make.

@Sensei
Yes I'm in a depressive episode.
I won't be doing this immediately as I need to order more SN - I won't say what I did with the free SN that was sent to me.

 

[MiseryLovesMyCompany]

Thank you.
Presumably I could just use my laptop webcam.
I wouldn't know how to set it up.
Presumably a discord room would be used?

A computer with a camera and internet access is all that's needed. The laptop is a perfect solution.
There are many programs that can be used, Discord should be fine.

 

[BipolarGuy]

A computer with a camera and internet access is all that's needed. The laptop is a perfect solution.
There are many programs that can be used, Discord should be fine.

Can you help with it?

 

[esse_est_percipi]

Yes I'm in a depressive episode.

I think I remember reading somewhere you started on a new medication. How is that?
I thought things were looking up for you when I saw all those pictures of your recent trip.
I'm sure you know this already but depressive episodes can heavily distort thought processes and perception of the world.

 

[MiseryLovesMyCompany]

Can you help with it?

I can help you with that, it does not take long with discord, and shouldn't be banned if you only invite those who you trust (as far as I'm concerned).
Although I'd be interested in what @LetzteAusfahrt's setup was.

 

[BipolarGuy]

I can help you with that, it does not take long with discord, and shouldn't be banned if you only invite those who you trust (as far as I'm concerned).
Although I'd be interested in what @LetzteAusfahrt's setup was.

Ok good, what would it actually take to set up?
Easy when you know!

 

[MiseryLovesMyCompany]

Ok good, what would it actually take to set up?
Easy when you know!

I guess it's better if we continue this in private and not flood this thread with it.

 

[BipolarGuy]

I have no idea how that stuff works. There was another user here who helped him with it, I'll try and dig around and see if i can establish who that was.

But ya Letzte was a total character throughout the whole thing. Gave a cheers to camera before he drank it like a whisky, sat back against the wall and lit a cigarette like he didn't give a single fuck what was happening.

Thank you, @MiseryLovesMyCompany is going to help me with setup.
Do you know anything about how Letz set up his equipment?

 

[MiseryLovesMyCompany]

Discord wouldn't be the best solution for liability reasons that's for sure. Although that part is of little concern to me, as they can't prosecute a corpse lol.

 

[BipolarGuy]

I think I remember reading somewhere you started on a new medication. How is that?
I thought things were looking up for you when I saw all those pictures of your recent trip.
I'm sure you know this already but depressive episodes can heavily distort thought processes and perception of the world.

Last weekend was the best time I've had in years. I actually felt happy.
Not "less depressed", but happy.

Medication: I've stopped again.
Unfortunately the pills are not helping me with anything practical.

Discord wouldn't be the best solution for liability reasons that's for sure. Although that part is of little concern to me, as they can't prosecute a corpse lol.

@MiseryLovesMyCompany well I'm happy to be guided, but I don't want to over complicate it.

 

[mahakaliSS_MahaDurga]

Last weekend was the best time I've had in years. I actually felt happy.
Not "less depressed", but happy.

I felt happy too. I did my best to be there for you and genuinely cared for you. I wish you luck in whatever you decide, and my inbox is always open if you want to talk. Take care.

 

[BipolarGuy]

Discord wouldn't be the best solution for liability reasons that's for sure. Although that part is of little concern to me, as they can't prosecute a corpse lol.

I'm happy to do it on discord because I have made a discord account.
I will just need help with setting it up.
I've just read your PM by the way - I have no idea how to make a discord room?

 

[Wisdom3_1-9]

Am I the only person who doesn't know what Discord is?

 

[BipolarGuy]

Am I the only person who doesn't know what Discord is?

I didn't know until the other day when I spoke to a guy on there.

It's basically a place to chat, as far as I understand it.

 

[Wisdom3_1-9]

It's basically a place to chat, as far as I understand it.

Is it safe? I could use some friends. Don't have anyone to chat with these days.

 

[BipolarGuy]

Is it safe? I could use some friends. Don't have anyone to chat with these days.

I have absolutely no idea.

I think SS had a discord group at one point.
You can add and talk to me if you like. I will warn you though - my emotions are not under control at the moment and so this may not be a good idea.

 

[Wisdom3_1-9]

I'd want to be a support for you. I can tell this is a really shit time for you.

 

[BipolarGuy]

I'd want to be a support for you. I can tell this is a really shit time for you.

I've had better times, that for sure.
I should have committed suicide last weekend when I was happy for the first time in years, but as ever I thought it would get better.



It didn't and won't.

 

[MiseryLovesMyCompany]

Is it safe? I could use some friends. Don't have anyone to chat with these days.

Depends on what you want to use it for.

 

[Ghost2211]

Just promise you don't strip down naked like our buddy Letzte did! lol that was rather strange and unnecessary

Hate to hear you're feeling shitty bud, you aren't alone in that regard

Lol wow, that's amazing. His personality just keeps getting better. I really miss that dude.

@BipolarGuy as always much love and respect to you, but are you certain about ctb at this point in your life considering you're very much in crisis. Is it not worth trying a stabilizing med to see if it helps? You're one of the few people I say this to because I've seen how easy it is to make you happier. It just seems you're going pretty out of your way to force this on yourself.

 

[BipolarGuy]

Lol wow, that's amazing. His personality just keeps getting better. I really miss that dude.

@BipolarGuy as always much love and respect to you, but are you certain about ctb at this point in your life considering you're very much in crisis. Is it not worth trying a stabilizing med to see if it helps? You're one of the few people I say this to because I've seen how easy it is to make you happier. It just seems you're going pretty out of your way to force this on yourself.

Thanks @RoseyBird .
Unfortunately meds won't make my situation better.
What do you mean that I'm forcing it on to myself, sorry?

 

[Ghost2211]

Thanks @RoseyBird .
Unfortunately meds won't make my situation better.
What do you mean that I'm forcing it on to myself, sorry?

I mean if you change your mind that much, and feel a need to be on video for added pressure and commitment. It's not SI stopping you its loved ones and potentials of hope.

 

[MiseryLovesMyCompany]

Spot on as always, @RoseyBird

 

[BipolarGuy]

I mean if you change your mind that much, and feel a need to be on video for added pressure and commitment. It's not SI stopping you its loved ones and potentials of hope.

I think you're right, it is potential of hope.
I'm having trouble with how perturbative my life is currently. It's totally up and down, and it's taking its toll on me.

I'm having to accept that nothing will change - no matter how many times somebody says to me "things could change".

 

[Ghost2211]

I think you're right, it is potential of hope.
I'm having trouble with how perturbative my life is currently. It's totally up and down, and it's taking its toll on me.

I'm having to accept that nothing will change - no matter how many times somebody says to me "things could change".

That's the thing though if tangible things like a job and people that care are what makes things doable then things literally can change. If I wanted a specific job then I would get a random one while I looked for it, so it falls through life won't with it.

 

[BipolarGuy]

That's the thing though if tangible things like a job and people that care are what makes things doable then things literally can change. If I wanted a specific job then I would get a random one while I looked for it, so it falls through life won't with it.

It isn't working out.

I know it's easy to say that all I need to do is this or that.....but 'this' or 'that' just isn't happening for me, and frankly I don't have the energy, perseverance or resilience to continue.

 

[Ghost2211]

It isn't working out.

I know it's easy to say that all I need to do is this or that.....but 'this' or 'that' just isn't happening for me, and frankly I don't have the energy, perseverance or resilience to continue.

Ok friend. I can respect that. Much hugs and love.

 

[BipolarGuy]

Ok friend. I can respect that. Much hugs and love.

I'm sorry if it's frustrating talking to me.
I often talk to people on here and I know that "all that needs to happen is......".
But it takes things to work out.

 

[Ghost2211]

I'm sorry if it's frustrating talking to me.
I often talk to people on here and I know that "all that needs to happen is......".
But it takes things to work out.

It's not frustrating. I just need to respect your choice since it is your life. I know how annoying it can be for people to be like just try this or that since they are on the outside. I'll support whatever choice you make.

 

[Wisdom3_1-9]

I think @RoseyBird is one of the kindest people ever on this site - always thoughtful and caring.

There are a few people in my life like that, and I just can't bear talking to them about how I really feel. They care so much and want me to feel better, but ultimately there's nothing they can do, and I don't want them to feel worse. I've just stopped saying anything.