forum user JJ 23/34

forum user JJ 23/34

defunct account, working on recovery
Jun 22, 2023
44
Looking after little cousin right now.
Had to hold to get him to sleep just like my own father did.

I know some people have truly awful parents.

I just think the narrative my psychiatrist / Freud pushed for that my father and mother had through trauma somehow made me experience the mental illness. 1) that's obviously bullshit. If I lived better I wouldn't have had those problems. Takes away accountability from yourself. Side note: a really smart really beautiful girl argued with me on this. I hope I at least date that girl in this lifetime 2) that kind of idea is very damaging for everyone.

My exam results come out in a few days. If they are good, my father and mother can be praised and feel they did a good job. I can feel hopeful for the future.

If they are bad, ie a 5 mark difference, then I am now a failure, my life is miserable, and my parents feel ashamed.

Title: was going to my question but I realise now it's stupid. Obviously my parents would rather me be a alive and dead.

Would post this on reddit but I've been banned for telling people not to kill themselves lmao. Imagine I might soon get banned from here for the same reasons.
 

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