Venting In need of some support

[Shell]

I am doing terrible at my job and as both cause and consequence of this (it is quite a vicious circle) my boss and coworkerts are treating me like shit, creating hidden groups with me, my boss is block a request I made for autism accomodations, etc. My parents constantly seem to flip-flop about whether or not they would support me in case I leave or get fired. No friend seems to understand my issues, I just feel lke there is no hope anymore. There will be a perfomance review next week and in current state of shitty productivity I am gonna probably be thrown under the bus (perhaps this is what fhey plan in their hidden groups). Extra-misery points for having had a girlfriend whom I intended to marry who died of cancer 3 years ago and I never really recovered. I am really, really lost right now.
*without me
*blocking

Sorry for the typos.

 

[BunBun]

oh man, I wish I could tell you it's going to be okay, but I don't want to make you feel like your worries aren't unfounded.
I have been in your boat and it sucks, especially when you're trying so hard to be productive but you just stumble in such a cluster fuck way you don't even know where to begin to recover.
I might not know your situation fully, so I can only make an estimated guess. But I am guessing that your manager isn't doing a very good job in being a manager. It is their job to see you struggling and making adjustments, especially if you have accommodations/needs. I'm really sorry you are going through this stress