I’m waiting for the tide (goodbye yall)

[theboiwhostilllived]

Checked in, 6.5 hours to go

 

[bigdog]

Brave
You think paracetamol will be enough for pain?

 

[theboiwhostilllived]

Brave
You think paracetamol will be enough for pain?

That's all I can do, paracetamol for possible headaches.

 

[bigdog]

Are you in the hotel already?
Shit I wish I would as brave as you are. I am afraid to do it without strong sedation

 

[theboiwhostilllived]

Are you in the hotel already?

Yes, 6h remaining is a long time.

 

[Wisdom3_1-9]

Brave
You think paracetamol will be enough for pain?

It should be enough. Stan's guide recommends the usual 1000 mg dose.

 

[theboiwhostilllived]

Remember, you don't have to if you don't want to. If you're having doubts, it may mean that you're still not ready; that there's still more of life you want to experience. I've backed out twice. There's no shame in backing out. Do what's right for you. Sending you virtual hugs and positive vibes.

Thank you for your kind reminder. When I think of backing out, I just don't know what I will do next if I want to stay alive. It seems like suicide is my only conclusion. Because there is plenty of time before midnight, I will vent abit.
I'm 25 years old guy living in a developing country that I don't like much, I have good family and friends but a rotten complicated mind. I'm too childish and unrealistic.
I'm too hungry, can I drink milk or yogurt? (It's not time for liquid fasting yet)

 

[theboiwhostilllived]

2h30m to go, feeling sad for leaving my family.

 

[Wisdom3_1-9]

Wish I could be there to give you strength. You seem like a Harry Potter fan. Would have loved to chat about the books and movies with a fellow Potterhead. ^_^

 

[InterstateFlowers]

Hello! I just want to say I wish you the best and I hope this comes out okay! Sorry, I'm not good at words. The point is that I hope everything goes well. I don't want you to feel like nobody's watching and doesn't care, if that makes sense! <3

 

[theboiwhostilllived]

Wish I could be there to give you strength. You seem like a Harry Potter fan. Would have loved to chat about the books and movies with a fellow Potterhead. ^_^

Yes, thank you for your kind words.

Hello! I just want to say I wish you the best and I hope this comes out okay! Sorry, I'm not good at words. The point is that I hope everything goes well. I don't want you to feel like nobody's watching and doesn't care, if that makes sense! <3

I understand, wish you all the best too!

 

[Soul]

@theboiwhostilllived, I hope this works out the very best way for you. I hope you don't feel pressured and that you'll put this on a back burner if you want to x

 

[theboiwhostilllived]

@theboiwhostilllived, I hope this works out the very best way for you. I hope you don't feel pressured and that you'll put this on a back burner if you want to x

Thank you
1h50min to go

 

[restingspot]

Just having hopefully my last meal (rice with seaweed and jelly). Start fasting. I don't know if I can go through it, feeling weird.View attachment 40045

If you're having doubts, you can stop. It's not a contest or a challenge. I know you said you HAD to do this, but is your situation unrepairable enough that there isn't an alternative method you can take? I'm not trying to force you to stop by the way, because at the end of the day this is YOUR body and YOUR mind, therefore it's YOUR choice, and I can't wrangle you from Vietnam all the way from the US

Whatever you choose to take you'll have support from us all the way.

 

[Remark]

Делай что должен. И будь что будет.

 

[theboiwhostilllived]

Honestly, I'm abit curious and excited about the experience which will come next.

 

[puppy9]

@theboiwhostilllived hey man. I love you.

Doraemon will be by your side.

 

[Deleted-User-0]

All the best but you don't have to do it if you are not sure about it. No one is going to judge you

 

[LetzteAusfahrt]

Honestly, I'm abit curious and excited about the experience which will come next.

I am happy for you that you will have these experiences soon.

We will all be with you, you are not alone on your way.
And should you still turn around, then that's no problem. You can make the way at any time

 

[theboiwhostilllived]

It's 11h10 PM here, I would like to say thank you all again for your support and kindness

 

[LetzteAusfahrt]

That goes without saying, you would also do it for us
How do you feel ?

 

[theboiwhostilllived]

I feel calm and determined. There is no way out, I will go through this.

 

[LetzteAusfahrt]

It is good that you are calm, then it is right for you and it is not an obligation, it is your decision.

 

[Sensei]

I expect you really do and are not like those who retract at the last minute.

Careful there. That can be interpreted as encouraging suicide which is strictly against the forum rules.

 

[Empty77]

I'm currently on 48h-regime and will drink SN at midnight tomorrow. I create this thread to say goodbye and thank you to SS community. I've visited SS in 2018 and at that time I didn't acknowledge SN method, I tried hanging but failed miserably. Now in 2020 I've gathered everything I need (after quite a long time) for SN method and booked a hotel room. Thank you SS community for helping me with the method and being my last resort in my final days.

If you ask me whether I have doubts I would say suicide is not something I want to do, but something I have to do. I'm used to think that I was blessed in life and have many privileges but now I just cannot find the will to live on. I lost everything due to depression, anxiety and BPD.

I will keep updating my experience with SN here as long as I can.

(Sorry for my English)


View attachment 39982
View attachment 39986

View attachment 39987

Wow! I don't often find myself short of superlative, but after reading that, I do today. I'm really sorry to read about the pain you're in right now. I can only say this, from someone who's been there; hold on! Think about something you've achieved in the past and all the hard work and commitment it took to get there. I could be wrong, but reading between the lines, I can see someone strong, intelligent, kind and honest. I'll pray that you find that strength again. If things really do get that bad where you've done something daft, get help, stat! Reach out, get the support you need and rebuild one day at a time. I'll pray for you. Good luck!

 

[theboiwhostilllived]

Start mixing SN with propranolol

 

[Deleted-User-0]

I expect you really do and are not like those who retract at the last minute. I wish you a lot of success with your "trip"

You better keep quiet ...

 

[puppy9]

I expect you really do and are not like those who retract at the last minute. I wish you a lot of success with your "trip"

Shut it troll. I don't know what you're up to. I smell something fishy.

 

[LetzteAusfahrt]

I recently wanted to write to you about something, but I don't know what anymore

Then it has to wait another 2 months before I leave also. We'll see each other soon, so I can still ask you.

 

[theboiwhostilllived]

Drank it, salty af
Warm, crazy, cough
Vomited