Help im lost,what do i tell my psychiatrist

[hex_id]

I failed my ctb with SN,due to the small dosage and the fact that i threw up in the first 5 mins.
After that i was left in a shock and couldnt do anything for 3 days,didnt eat didnt get out of my room i looked tired and i felt unreal
i think i developed a trauma after the failed attempt ..and after 19 years of life i finally opened up to my parents.I even told them i tried to ctb and that i have severe panic attacks and anxiety.
They told me some things that made me feel ok..i want to change my life around but i cant change the fact that i have this sort of trauma and my anxiety and everything
My mom told me i can try a psychiatrist and she supports me into this
I said yes,i want to be helped

But now i overthink about it,what happens if i go there?what do i tell her/him? That i wanted to ctb but failed?how do i tell someone that just like that?it took me so much to say it to my mom
How do i tell them i cant talk to any1 without overthinking,sweating and feeling like my heart its racing.
I want help but im scared.
Im scared to tell a psychiatrist how i feel..what i ve done.
What if they prescribe me some medication? im scared people will start treating me different when they ll find out i take medication for psychological problems

Im also scared of not knowing how to talk/describe my problems.
im scared ill just look like a dumb guy who is there to make time pass..

 

[Hardcore_Henry]

i think i developed a trauma after the failed attempt ..and after 19 years of life i finally opened up to my parents.I even told them i tried to ctb and that i have severe panic attacks and anxiety.

Man, that must have been cathartic.

one thing i can say is that bearing your true feelings and pains to someone you can trust is the most helpful thing you can do for yourself, and you've done that. the next step is talking to the psychiatrist.

now i have a little experience with being in therapy as i also have severe anxiety (though its been a while) and while it does have wildly varying results for people, for me it was incredibly helpful. it put things into prospective and i have a better relationship with my parents because of it. so have some comfort in knowing that it the concept does have merit for some.

as for how you're going to talk to the psychiatrist... i don't know, that's something you're going to have to figure out yourself. but what i did was have my parents sit in with me a couple times, it provided a level of comfort that wasn't there if i was alone. maybe you could consider that.

What if they prescribe me some medication? im scared people will start treating me different when they ll find out i take medication for psychological problems

Im also scared of not knowing how to talk/describe my problems.
im scared ill just look like a dumb guy who is there to make time pass..

i took medication on/off throughout my life, and while it does effect people in different ways people will not treat you differently, because its not their business anyway unless you tell them. and don't be scared to talk about your problems, you're not dumb for doing so, that's what you're there for!

 

[ForgottenAgain]

I know it can seem daunting but you should have nothing to worry about. I've been to 2 psychiatrists so far and it is just a matter of saying your symptoms, how you're feeling, and go from there. They're used to dealing with all kinds of people and psychological problems, it will be totally fine to say you attempted to ctb and anything else really.

If they prescribe medication I know it can be tough at first. We have our own ideas and preconceptions about psychiatric medication but, think about it, if it was about getting medication for a broken leg or diabetes you wouldn't think twice about it. This is the same thing, just a different body part.

Taking medication doesn't mean you're crazy or less than and it's amazing that your parents support you. You won't be a different person, you'll just be healing, and you don't have to tell people what you're taking medication for. I took meds while at school and never specified what for, just that I was taking meds and having side effects.

I hope your appointment with the psychiatrist goes well and brings you some calmness. Everything will be alright

 

[Final_Choice]

I've had some experience with talking to psychiatrists, though every psychiatrist is different. Generally so long as you're open to them and willing to try things it'll be ok. If you say you're going of your own volition the psych will more than likely note the CTB attempt (if you decide to say it) but won't lock you away in a psych ward or anything. I will say that some attempts are seen differently from others, like an OD attempt with any meds around will be seen more lightly compared to more planned out attempts. If you don't want to specify it you could just not and then say it was an OD if they ask again. They may give you some meds but no one has to know, it's illegal for the doctor to tell anyone besides patient (even parents) and no one needs to know. These days people are more open about using meds for stuff like this, so as long as they aren't an ahole people won't judge you for using meds if you decide to tell them. Just try to say whatever you feel safe telling them. There's no true way of explaining this stuff so the doctor will probably understand if you explain it in your own way, they might just ask for clarifications some times. I hope it all turns out well. :)